THE FETZ profile picture

THE FETZ

drummilingus

About Me

i hate the drums. i suck at life. end of story.
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My Interests

quasi-intellectual hob-nobbery, intense scrutiny of trivial minutiae, hyper-critical psychological introspection, self-effacing attempts at humor, over-hyphenating, puppies, ice cream, butterflies, flowers, death metal.

I'd like to meet:

not you. that's for sure. you're probably not very nice. even if you are, it doesn't matter because here, we are all just binary code.

Music:

is comprised of waves of sound at sustained frequencies known as "notes". These are arranged in intervals called "scales" which can be re-arranged into "melodies". Often these "melodies" are accompanied by complimentary sound vibrations forming what are known as "harmonies" and can be emphasized by percussive accentuations or dynamic shifts in note placement. These are commonly referred to as "rhythms".

Movies:

Slang term for "moving pictures". Movies feature people pretending to be other people, who pretend to be themselves in real life.

Television:

Invented in the mid-twentieth century by the Nazis and used for sadistic mind control and behavior modification experiments. Later adapted for civillian use and palced in homes worldwide. The emission of cathode radiation causes temporary hypnosis in viewers of television, or "T.V." as it's come to be known. In addition to sedative radiatory properties, televisions have been outfitted to receive transmissions of carefully selected programming designed to sub-consciously affect it's viewers. These transmissions are often designed to be thrilling and entertaining to the unsuspecting viewer, but almost always contain encrypted propaganda and subliminal messages designed to enslave the minds of the populace at large. Television is effective tool in controling the flow of information to the minds of its subjects, thereby enabling powers-that-be to regulate what the general public thinks, and how they behave.

Books:

are paper with words printed on them... very high in fiber.

Heroes:

Jesus

My Blog

i go to college now.

it's boring and it makes my butt hurt. kind of like prison, but with vending machines.
Posted by THE FETZ on Thu, 13 Sep 2007 11:23:00 PST

going to the zoo

Lissy and I went to the zoo yesterday. It was hilarious. There were eighty quadrillion grade school kids on field trips to see all the exciting animals.... who were all napping. If I was a zoo animal,...
Posted by THE FETZ on Thu, 31 May 2007 07:57:00 PST

UPCOMING SHOWS

VULNERATA. On a tuesday again... March 20th... station 4 again... then again on April 11th at THE ROCK in Maplewood. Under Eden is playing just before, so I get to warm-up for once. I might even play ...
Posted by THE FETZ on Fri, 16 Mar 2007 10:51:00 PST

KRISIUN is better than your band

And mine. All of the bands that I have ever been in can not equal the power of these three metal brothers. Sharing the stage with them was an honor and a privilage. Thanks to everyone who came ou...
Posted by THE FETZ on Wed, 14 Feb 2007 11:03:00 PST

ATTENTION RECORD LABELS!!!!!

Vulnerata needs a label to put our album out.   We have artwork and layout already formatted. 9 songs recorded. No money Many, many firearms.   Sign us or else. Or else go to www.myspace.com...
Posted by THE FETZ on Thu, 25 Jan 2007 07:46:00 PST

Upcoming Shows

Well... at least the "s" at the end of "shows"... Because really it's just one show...  KRISUN!!!!! With DEMONICON.  It is our aim to not only annihlate all of Christiandom, but also pu...
Posted by THE FETZ on Fri, 19 Jan 2007 11:19:00 PST

p. b. r.

for dinner? pabst. for breakfast?           asprin
Posted by THE FETZ on Sat, 23 Dec 2006 11:00:00 PST

my pussy hurts

Have you ever hit yourself in the knee cap as hard as you possibly can with a drumstick? That shit hurts. And continues to hurt. I'll probably be feeling that some rainy day when I'm 80 years old... &...
Posted by THE FETZ on Thu, 14 Dec 2006 09:27:00 PST

I fucking told you I was better at drums than you.

Do YOU have an interview in www.sickdrummer.com? Didn't think so, bitch. Www.sickdrummer.com has been blessed with my mighty presence, and has been allowed the privelage of using my award-winning name...
Posted by THE FETZ on Sun, 03 Dec 2006 09:51:00 PST

I'm better at drums than you.

And you know it. Just admit it. You'll never be as good as me. So give up. Better yet, just go put yourself out of your misery and commit suicide. But include me in your Last Will and Testament as the...
Posted by THE FETZ on Thu, 16 Nov 2006 11:14:00 PST