Maggie profile picture

Maggie

bonafide hustler, making my name...

About Me

Maggie's Early Days and Subsequent Adoption by the Matteson Family... a Remembrance:This is the truth. Some people think I had it easy. Some people think I was born into this family. That couldn't be further from the truth. This is a real life rags to riches story. I came up from the streets, I worked and I scrapped. I can't say that I remember my mother... the bitch (not a swear word, remember, I'm a dog) left me shortly after birth, and I had to fend for myself on the mean streets of Fulton. You know what? I did it... I made it happen, I hustled when I had to. Am I proud of everything that happened? No, of course I'm not. But what is a puppy to do when she's left to fend for herself? I guess you could say I hit rock bottom when I went to the pound... people had given me up for dead, and I can't say that I blame them, things were looking bleak for Maggie. But, you know what? A family came, and they adopted me, and there I was, back in Fulton, a free mutt... things were starting to look up. If you don't know, I'm a strong ass pit bull/lab mix, and I don't mean to brag but I'm strong as hell. The family that adopted me has my eternal gratitude, but I'm too friggin' strong to be tied up. I broke countless leashes, and even chains. I was an escape artist, and growing up on the streets gave me that wanderlust. I soon proved too elusive for that family, they just couldn't go tracking me down all day. It looked like I had blown my big audition. Luckily, another opportunity opened up for me, but I was a bit nervous about my chances, would I blow this one as well, and end up back on the streets... or worse yet the joint again? At first I was hesitant, I didn't want to get my hopes up, I have been shuffled around too much to give my affection away at first. But, after a while, I started to see that this gig might be permanent! Man, I gotta tell you, my house is a real classy joint. At first my owners tried to not allow me to get up on the furniture... that soon changed though. They live back in the woods, where I can explore and wander with no consequences. And the neighbors have some pretty cool dogs... we run in a pack together, I'm the leader along with Big Chels... maybe she'll get a profile on here one of these days. Anyway, it's a pretty sweet hookup now. They've given me my own email address, and I basically just surf the web most of the day. But, that's my story... from the streets to the couch!

My Interests

Sleeping, licking myself, fetching things, walking around with my food dish in my mouth, rubbing up against furniture, dragging people's shoes into the middle of the floor (then feeling guilty when they see it), rolling in gross stuff, MILK-BONE treats, canned food, chasing birds away from our birdfeeder... they might yell at me now but that birdseed will come in handy!, Hanging out with my dogs Big Chels/Max/Max/Pooh Bear/White Shadow, letting Andy sleep on my bed (not the other way around as he thinks), going to football games and freaking out, sniffing others of my species, wandering in the woods, running really fast, eating cat food when the people can't see me, playing with my toys, not letting Big Chels play with my toys, that gross turkey leg thing I found and brought home and my family kept trying to hide from me.

I'd like to meet:

The guy who invented the frisbee.

Music:

Of Montreal, Guided by Voices, Animal Collective, Panda Bear, Fleet Foxes, Danielson, The Clash, Creedence Clearwater Revival, Olivia Tremor Control, The Beach Boys, Blackalicious, Skip James, The Microphones, Latyrx, Sleater-Kinney, Neutral Milk Hotel, Clap Your Hands Say Yeah, Wolf Parade, Miles Davis, Robert Johnson, The Kinks, Grand Buffet, The Ramones, Dave Brubeck, Lupe Fiasco, PJ Harvey, T.I., Big Bill Broozny

Movies:

many are the number of movies i love. a very incomplete list would be: american beauty, no country for old men, the last picture show, ordinary people, ghost world, the seventh seal, rushmore, the iron giant, hoosiers, night of the hunter, scarlet street, l.a. confidential.

Television:

Puppy Bowl, The Office, The Simpsons, Strangers With Candy, The Wonder Years, College Basketball, Freaks and Geeks, Crimson Tide football.

Books:

Currently reading: Everyday Math textbook...

Heroes:

The Matteson family!

My Blog

A Bad case of the Heartworm... is there any other kind?

Sorry I haven’t updated lately. I’ve had a bad case of heartworm. But, like I posed hypothetically earlier, I don’t think there is any such thing as a good case of heartworm.  A...
Posted by Maggie on Thu, 27 Mar 2008 08:00:00 PST

the sweet life of magnus (maggie) ver burninator

child one: third grade teacher in the hannibal central school district starting this year... child two: studying to be a doctor of pharmacy... child three: off to hobart to study and play colleg...
Posted by Maggie on Fri, 10 Aug 2007 09:03:00 PST

EXCITING NEWS

One of my masters, the 25, soon to be 26 year old (my myspace consultant) has landed a teaching position in the school district he was gunning for, along with the possibility of several lucr...
Posted by Maggie on Thu, 31 May 2007 07:59:00 PST

THE AWESOME POWER...

of the wilson ncode n4 model tennis racquet cannot be doubted nor denied. all shall perish to its wrath. kneel or suffer the consequences. also, i have started to eat too much grass and am consta...
Posted by Maggie on Thu, 03 May 2007 06:56:00 PST

New Necklace

I got a new Hobart necklace. Some people call it a collar... but i think that is degrading. Let's just call it a necklace. Also, I threw up in the yard today. My attempts to eat it again were thwarte...
Posted by Maggie on Tue, 24 Apr 2007 07:20:00 PST

WOO-HOO

I Freakin' love the Soviet national anthem.
Posted by Maggie on Fri, 01 Dec 2006 04:54:00 PST

Long Live X!!!!

The Sun never set on Xavier Nady...
Posted by Maggie on Mon, 04 Sep 2006 10:00:00 PST

he's not as stupid as he looks

yeah, so one of my masters has a live journal where he posts most of his thoughts/feelings. kind of sappy if you ask me. but, you probably didn't. cool.   http://loveboat4444.livejournal.com/...
Posted by Maggie on Tue, 22 Aug 2006 01:57:00 PST

Lyrics by the Microphones

I thought I felt your shape but I was wrongReally all I felt was falsely strongI held on tight and closed my eyesIt was dumb I had no sense of your sizeIt was dumb to hold so tightBut last night On th...
Posted by Maggie on Sun, 06 Aug 2006 07:23:00 PST

Kerouac

"The only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time, the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but b...
Posted by Maggie on Mon, 10 Jul 2006 08:47:00 PST