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TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: Mike, Mikey, Mick...the list is endless
Birthday: 17/02/1977
Birthplace: Portsmouth
Current Location: Hayling Island
Eye Color: Hazel with a hint of green
Hair Color: Dark Brown
Height: 6 feet 1 inch
Right Handed or Left Handed: Right
Your Heritage: I tell most people my mum had a brief affair with Elvis during his 'gutbuster' sandwich years.
The Shoes You Wore Today: I was a bare-footed hippy today.
Your Weakness: A nice round bottom
Your Fears: That'll end up alone, living with a selection of stinking pets and gasp my last choking on a regurgitated kebab and stella mix.
Your Perfect Pizza: Barbecue, with as many dead animals, onions and and peppers on as possible. Jalapenos are good.
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: Move out.
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: Fuck you!
Thoughts First Waking Up: Bacon.
Your Best Physical Feature: Changed my mind about this - definately my lower arms
Your Bedtime: What's that then?
Your Most Missed Memory: What?Is it me or does that not make any fucking sense whatsoever. You probably mean 'most missed life event from the past'. You can't miss a memory because its a memory - it's always with you. If you've missed it, you've forgotten it.(God, I was so angry when I wrote this)
Pepsi or Coke: Coke, preferably cherry
MacDonalds or Burger King: Neither - KFC
Single or Group Dates: Single. I mean, who goes for all that kitsch, Americanised, Happy Days, double-dating clap-trap anyway?Life isn't cunting episode of friends is it? I don't plan to screw someone and then think 'Hey, better invite my mates along'(Disclaimer - I don't hate Americans, just the idealised utopian American dream crap)
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: I wouldn't be so fucking pretentious to drink it
Chocolate or Vanilla: I like a bit of both if you know what i mean
Cappuccino or Coffee: Coffee. Cappuccino is an invention of the lower middle classes so they can sound sophisticated in those crappy franchised coffee shops you find on nearly every dilapidated high street these days
Do you Smoke: I used to.
Do you Swear: No fucking way! (Oh, dear, did I really write something as tired and cliched as that?)
Do you Sing: If I want to keep the birds away
Do you Shower Daily: Yes, with the occassional lapse for tiredness.
Have you Been in Love: A couple of times. I invariably get hurt. I'm thinking of giving it up.(Update, Oh dear I'm in love again, the birds sound sweeter, the air is lighter and the woman loves me back.
***Wafts around romaticly as if on a cushion of air, smile beaming on his face, approaches the pavement and, without a care in the world, wonders into the middle of the road - SPLAT!
Do you want to go to College: Been there, done that, had the alcohol dependency problem to prove it.
Do you want to get Married: Not if it means 30 years of unrelenting nagging, no.
Do you belive in yourself: Yes, in the same way that I don't believe in fairies. I've checked with the public records office and they have confirmed I am for real.
Do you get Motion Sickness: From 3d computer games and drinking 10 pints of lager and doing that thing they do with the broom on club 18-30 holidays.
Do you think you are Attractive: Hell no!
Are you a Health Freak: Hmmm, let me think - NO
Do you get along with your Parents: Of course I don't, I live with them!!
Do you like Thunderstorms: Love 'em. In fact I regularly go out in them covered in tin foil, dancing in the street to satanic metal while profusely blaspheming.
Do you play an Instrument: I play with my organ regularly.
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: YES
In the past month have you Smoked: NO
In the past month have you been on Drugs: NO, but I wish I had.
In the past month have you gone on a Date: Sort of.
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: No, because I live in England currently. Given 6 months I expect to be dragged around many 'malls'
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: No comment and I want a breif.
Ever been Drunk: Which moron wrote this piece of shit honestly.
Ever been called a Tease: No, what should I do then, hitch up my jeans and show you my calves?input type='hidden' name='question53' value='Ever+bee
