Jim

Jim Rules!! Jim's Page - WOO HOO! was previously living in the middle of b.f.nowhere japan (saiki, oita ken if you were wondering. see, told you so, b.f.nowhere) teaching english to elementary and junior high kids. having been there for three years (prison sentances are shorter) decided to return to good old blighty and continue my pre "enlightenment journey of dossing about for 3 years in japan" studies and become a lawyer. currently working at a law firm in worcester (if you're american or canadian, you may be an absolutely fantasticly nice chap/chapette, and hats off to you and all that, but please...don't even try to pronounce that last word...which one?...worcester....yes....that one.....). and once again, like the japanese, it seems i'm convincingly deceiving the other people at said law company in believing that i know what i'm doing. a veritable master of bullshit. i'm going to make a great lawyer........
also, as you may have realised by now, in my personal and humble opinion....rugby.....ROCKS! for the americans (canadians suprisingly understand the sport quite well....but i digress) out there, it's a bit like american football, except without the full plate armour, and you can't pass forwards. oh, and rugby players are, as a general rule, nowhere near the fitness level of football players (we drink a bit too much beer now and again....). in fact, most chess players have got a better physique than your average rugger boy. this, perhaps, should be noted when taking into account my "athletic" body type - i AM athletic....by rugby standards. therefore, although i am not a lard arse with a huge gut, the only six pack i have is in the fridge, waiting at home for me after a long day at work (shame it can't give me a blow job or i'd marry it). in fact, talking of beer and drinking, let us take a moment to think and reflect, and offer a prayer to beer, that elixier of life which has been helping ugly people have sex since 1862....
THE BEER PRAYER
Our beer,
Which art in barrels,
Hallowed be thy drink,
Thy will be drunk, (I will be drunk),
At home as I am in the pub.
Give us this day our foamy head,
And forgive us our spillages,
As we forgive those who spill against us,
And lead us not into incarceration,
But deliver us from hangovers,
For thine is the beer,
The bitter, and the lager,
Forever and ever...
Barmen.
anyway, sidetracking there a bit. where were we? oh yes, rugby. you could even (if you really wanted to) take it a level further and say that rugby is one of the most politically correct games out there playable. doesn't matter what weight you are. doesn't matter what size you are. doesn't matter what race you are. doesn't matter what gender you are. doesn't matter what age you are. doesn't matter what religion you are. rugby.... the game for fat, ethnic minority, new age spiritual church believing 80 year old grannies!! gotta love it.
so, if you're a rugger fan like myself, or you like the sound of it, or are just plain bored, check out this rugby flash game . for the beer lovers out there (which, in essence, should be one and the same), you USED to be able to play a certain wonderful masterpiece of a game below... on MY page... however, some git (the guy who designed the game) sold out and gave it to some bloody flash game website (the pure injustice of it...). so, if you're desperate to play beer dude 2, then click here . personally, i wouldn't lower myself to that kind of capitalist sell out thing-a-me-bob unless i was really, REALLY bored at work... like now.
TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: James Matthew Phelps
Birthday: 31 May 1980
Birthplace: Birmingham, England
Current Location: Halesowen, England
Eye Color: Brown
Hair Color: Black
Height: 6'2"
Right Handed or Left Handed: Righty
Your Heritage: English/Welsh
The Shoes You Wore Today: Puma Brushspike
Your Weakness: Beer
Your Fears: My local pub running out of beer
Your Perfect Pizza: Lots of MEAT!!!
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: To think of a goal to achieve this year
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: :p
Thoughts First Waking Up: Snooze button...
Your Best Physical Feature: ???
Your Bedtime: 12:00
Your Most Missed Memory: I forgot it
Pepsi or Coke: Coke
MacDonalds or Burger King: Burger King
Single or Group Dates: Single
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Tetly's
Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate
Cappuccino or Coffee: Coffee
Do you Smoke: Yup
Do you Swear: Of course i don't fucking swear
Do you Sing: Yup... badly
Do you Shower Daily: Yup
Have you Been in Love: Yup
Do you want to go to College: Been there
Do you want to get Married: Yup, one day
Do you belive in yourself: Yup
Do you get Motion Sickness: Not recently
Do you think you are Attractive: Only my arse
Are you a Health Freak: Nope
Do you get along with your Parents: Yup, sometimes
Do you like Thunderstorms: Yup
Do you play an Instrument: Yup
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: Yup
In the past month have you Smoked: Yup
In the past month have you been on Drugs: Nope
In the past month have you gone on a Date: Nope
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: Yup
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: Nope
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: Yup
In the past month have you been on Stage: Nope
In the past month have you been Dumped: Nope
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: Nope
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: Nope
Ever been Drunk: Yup
Ever been called a Tease: Yup
Ever been Beaten up: Yup
Ever Shoplifted: Nope
How do you want to Die: With a big smile on my face
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: An adult
What country would you most like to Visit: Antarctica (isn't that a continent and a country? sorry, i don't do geography...)
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: No preference
Favourite Hair Color: Dark
Short or Long Hair: Long
Height: Shorter than me
Weight: Lighter than me
Best Clothing Style: Not a fashion designer, don't know
Number of Drugs I have taken: Isn't Caffeine a drug?
Number of CDs I own: A few
Number of Piercings: None
Number of Tattoos: None
Number of things in my Past I Regret: None
CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!
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