Curtis profile picture

Curtis

GO AWAY

About Me

I eat the soggy newspapers out of recycling bins after the first rains. The newsprint gives me fiber, the mold and mildew serve as my leafy greens, and the assorted earwigs and pillbugs provide me with protein. I also enjoy placing my head on train tracks in order to hear the soothing sound of an oncoming train. From time to time, I pass out due to self-diagnosed narcolepsy and sleep-walk into local supermarkets where I soil the lobster tanks with my bodily fluids.

My Interests

Going to record stores and swapping covers in the consignment section.

I'd like to meet:

I probably don't want to meet you, as there is a really good chance you are an idiot and I hate you. However, if you are a rich crusty (I know, the adjective is unnecessary) and need to sell off your record collection and musical gear for pennies on the dollar because you don't want mommy and daddy to realize you need more money to support your heroin habit, I will be more than happy to do business with you.

Music:

Screeching Weasel, Bad Religion, The Queers, Buddy Holly, MTX, Bangs, Negativland, Weezer, Chuck Berry, The Ramones, The Misfits, Green Day, The Temptations, Angry Samoans, Dag Nasty, The Circle Jerks, The Grateful Dead, classical (stuff with an orchestra, not the Beatles), LOVECOMMAND

Movies:

There's not enough room to list them all, so I'll tell you what I don't like: overly goofy screwball comedies that play it way too safe and then get all serious at the end, formulaic and self-referential slasher flicks, and unnecessary sequels

Books:

Mark Twain, Robert Jordan, Chuck Palahniuk, Tolkien, Bret Easton Ellis, Robert Anton Wilson, Douglas Adams, William Gibson, Gregory McDonald, Douglas Adams, and lots of other shit that I can't think of.