Lisa Landry profile picture

Lisa Landry

I love ipod. The voices in my head now have background music.

About Me


click here to go to my website
Hey! I'm Lisa Landry...stand-up comedian, actress & good time enthusiast. I JUST CAME OUT WITH MY FIRST CD AND YOU CAN ORDER IT ON MY WEBSITE. My half hour special is currently playing on Comedy Central- have some- it goes well with beer and Doritos. I recently taped a stand-up DVD with Brett Butler called "The Southern Belles of Comedy." But I am no Southern Belle! Southern Belles are those baby doll pretty debutantes who can brew sweet tea while they bake pecan pies and curl their hair and sing that old-time churchy favorite "What a friend we have in Jesus." I'm a Southern Girl who can chug a beer and light a cigarette while I parallel park my daddy's stick shift pick up truck and belt out that trailer park anthem "Sweet Home Alabama." The only way I can even stomach a sweet tea is with a shot of bourbon to cut the sugar. Catch me early this year on CMT's "20 Greatest Redneck Moments" and you'll see what I mean. I've been super busy lately- featured on Comedy Central's "Premium Blend" and asked to do commentary for E!'s "Forbes Top 100 Celebrities" "Mike and Juliet in the Morning" and "Redeye". I even co-starred on "Law and Order: SVU". (That rocked) I'm also a contributer to US WEEKLY'S "Fashion Police" -which is ironic cuz all I ever wear are jeans and black t-shirts. What can I say- I guess I choose function over form. See- I consistently oversleep and need to rush out my apartment. I just think-Quick! Put on SOMETHING and get out the door already-and the jeans are always right there on the floor...Check out my website: www.lisalandry.com and come see me live!THANKS SO MUCH if you voted for me in the StandUp Showdown on Comedy Central. I really appreciate it!

My Interests

I love sleeping. I love television. I love Doritos. I love to work and I hate to be busy. I have dedicated much of my life to finding the most delectable tex mex known to humanity. Right now- La Fonda in Santa Fe is in the lead. I love beer- I think what the world needs a kick ass global keg party right about now. I love Cold Case Files, the Law and Orders and CSI's so I guess I like dead people. I am obsessed with the newest cultural phenonemon whereby widespread rudeness has become acceptable and even encouraged. I am fascinated with humanity. Is that deep enough to counter balance my deep and unabating love for beer?

I'd like to meet:

My destiny.

Music:

Anything by a NOLA artist.

Movies:

Arthur, Tsotsi, Chinatown, Election, Donnie Darko, Steel Magnolias (I know- I'm a super dork- DRINK YOUR JUICE, SHELBY!), Closer, The Exorcist, Caddyshack, As Good as it Gets, Cold Mountain, American History X, Dumb and Dumber, Beetlejuice, Reservoir Dogs, Dangerous Liasons, Maria Full of Grace, Last Tango in Paris, The Last Seduction, North by Northwest, Psycho, Shaun of the Dead, Repo Man, Seven, Fight Club, Tie Me Up! Tie Me Down!, The Hunger, Fargo, American Beauty, Female Trouble, Pecker, Lost in Translation, Bring It On, The Devil in Mrs. Jones, Capote, Fast Times at Ridgemont High, Monster's Ball, Gia, Xanadu, Animal House

Television:

YES!!! I will watch anything but make over shows. Although if you've ever seen me-you probably figured that out for yourself.

Books:

Come in really handy in the bathroom. And when you can't find the fly swatter. And when you need to stash money. And when you run out of Zig Zag's. And when a little kid comes over and sits at the dinner table and can't reach. And when you want to seem unapproachable in a bar.

Heroes:

Madonna, Rosa Parks, FDR, computer geeks because-they're hot! All those people helping rebuild the Gulf Coast (I grew up outside of NOLA). Senator Mary Landrieu (D-LA) for saying during a television interview right after Katrina that if the president gave her any grief she would "slap him." :) People who grow up oppressed but come to formulate their own opinions instead of being lead like sheep. Anyone who can have lots of fun and get the stuff done on their to do list but not take it all so seriously that they act like dickheads. The obvious: Firefighters, Army, Navy, Air Force, Marines- cuz I could never. That chick who got her arm chewed off by a shark and continues to surf- that girl may be one arm shy of average but she has some set of balls.
TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: Lisa Landry
Birthday: Aug 5- The day Marilyn Monroe died.
Birthplace: NOLA
Current Location: NYC
Eye Color: Hazel
Hair Color: Blondish
Height: 5'5"
Right Handed or Left Handed: Both
Your Heritage: Cajun
The Shoes You Wore Today: Were on my feet
Your Weakness: Booze and television
Your Fears: Being booked in a dry county w/o cable.
Your Perfect Pizza: Is a taco
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: World Domination
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: "I won't tell anyone."
Thoughts First Waking Up: Not this again.
Your Best Physical Feature: My mind
Your Bedtime: Between midnight and 6AM
Your Most Missed Memory: My dad's laugh
Pepsi or Coke: Both diet both with Jack Daniels NO LIME!
MacDonalds or Burger King: Will kill you
Single or Group Dates: Yes
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Beer
Chocolate or Vanilla: Nacho Cheese Doritos
Cappuccino or Coffee: Do people still drink Cappuccino? How yuppie.
Do you Smoke: PCP- but not on school nights.
Do you Swear: Me? I'm a fucking angel.
Do you Sing: Yes-to annoy people on the subway.
Do you Shower Daily: Sometimes twice a day to wash away bad chi.
Have you Been in Love: Every time.
Do you want to go to College: Been there.
Do you want to get Married: Done that.
Do you belive in yourself: I can look in the mirror and see myself so, yeah.
Do you get Motion Sickness: Only when I move.
Do you think you are Attractive: As long as I'm not looking in the mirror.
Are you a Health Freak: If you leave out the Health part.
Do you get along with your Parents: I'm a comedian- what do you think?
Do you like Thunderstorms: They get me hot.
Do you play an Instrument: I've never called it that.
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: Often and with feeling.
In the past month have you Smoked: What?
In the past month have you been on Drugs: I'm high on life and MSG!
In the past month have you gone on a Date: Yes- don't tell my husband.
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: Lloyd Center, Portland, OR
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: Dorito girl- don't like sweets.
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: Often and with feeling.
In the past month have you been on Stage: The real question is have I been off?
In the past month have you been Dumped: No, but I've been dumped ON.
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: I haven't done anything skinny this year.
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: Millions of hearts and a couple of doughnuts.
Ever been Drunk: Not since yesterday.
Ever been called a Tease: Not since high school gym class.
Ever been Beaten up: Only as foreplay.
Ever Shoplifted: Never. Told you I'm a fucking angel.
How do you want to Die: Dorito overdose
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: An adult
What country would you most like to Visit: Texas
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: Brown
Favourite Hair Color: Black
Short or Long Hair: Thick
Height: 6'2"
Weight: 200
Best Clothing Style: off
Number of Drugs I have taken: Define "Drugs."
Number of CDs I own: I hate math.
Number of Piercings: Three
Number of Tattoos: O
Number of things in my Past I Regret: I hate math.
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