Constantly Natalie. - ProfilesArchive

About Me

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He was leading us through the dark
He was saying that "love goes on"
I was wanting some ice cream, a treat
He knew exactly what I meant
From the driver's seat in the dark
He popped a tape in the dash of his car
And when the singer started to scream
I knew exactly what he meant
I never knew for sure, what a wonderful man he was
What a sensible man he was
What a marvelous man he was
Why do we love what is wrong?
Big devil told us to sing along
And like a loving flock we obey, except for him,
He went his own way
I never knew for sure, what a wonderful man he was
Till the day I found out his cause,
Was to do it for all of us
I read once that the ancient egyptians had 50 words for sand and the eskimos had 100 words for snow. I wish I had a thousand words for love, but all that comes to mind is the way you move against me while you sleep and there are no words for that.
"I love you. And not, not in a friendly way, although I think we're great friends. And not in a misplaced affection, puppy-dog way, although I'm sure that's what you'll call it. I love you. Very, very simple, very truly. You are the epitome of everything I have ever looked for in another human being. And I know that you think of me as just a friend, and crossing that line is the furthest thing from an option you would ever consider. But I had to say it. I just, I can't take this anymore. I can't stand next to you without wanting to hold you. I can't, I can't look into your eyes without feeling that, that longing you only read about in trashy romance novels. I can't talk to you without wanting to express my love for everything you are. And I know this will probably queer our friendship - no pun intended - but I had to say it, because I've never felt this way before, and I don't care. I like who I am because of it. And if bringing this to light means we can't hang out anymore, then that hurts me. But God, I just, I couldn't allow another day to go by without just getting it out there, regardless of the outcome, which by the look on your face is to be the inevitable shoot-down. And, you know, I'll accept that. But I know...I know that some part of you is hesitating for a moment, and if there is a moment of hesitation, then that means you feel something too. All I ask, please, is that you just, you just not dismiss that - and try to dwell in it for just ten seconds. There isn't another soul on this fucking planet who has ever made me half the person I am when I'm with you, and I would risk this friendship for the chance to take it to the next plateau. Because it is there between you and me. You can't deny that. Even if, you know, even if we never talk again after tonight, please know that I'm forever changed because of who you are and what you've meant to me, which - while I do appreciate it -I'd never need a painting of birds bought at a diner to remind me of."
You know, I didn't just heed what I was taught, men and women should be together, it's the natural way, that kind of thing. I'm not with you because of what family, society, life tried to instill in me from day one. The way the world is, how seldom it is that you meet that one person who just *gets* you - it's so rare. And to cut oneself off from finding that person, to immediately halve your options by eliminating the possibility of finding that one person within your own gender, that just seems stupid to me. So I don't.
I remembered why I opened the door to women in the first place: to not limit the likelihood of finding that one person who'd complement me so completely. So here we are. I was thorough when I looked for you. And I feel justified lying in your arms, 'cause I got here on my own terms, and I have no question there was some place I didn't look. And for me that makes all the difference.
-Chasing Amy
I am that I am, and there is no variation or shadow due to change that. Although I may seem different to you on a day to day basis, when you turn out the light and touch my face, you will know me without a doubt. I am that I am. I have found my way through unmanned forests, and uncharted territories guided only by my spirit. I know what size shoe I wear but even with that, sometimes I find it necessary to try on a size bigger so I can be reminded that I still have room to grow, as well squeeze my foot into a smaller size to remind myself how much I HAVE grown. There are no witnesses, and so I must testify on my own behalf, that I have loved to the fullest and while I may not have lived thus far to my full potential, I have opened my eyes to the light that shines in through the windows waiting to be opened. They will be opened, even if it's just to let in the cool breeze of my destiny that waits for me ever so patiently. There are those that have the ability to take the sun, and manage to transform it into a yellow dot on a canvas, ever so beautifully...and then there are those who have the incredible ability to take a yellow dot, and transform it into the sun. Life is my canvas, and I will paint as my eyes see it before me.
I am in love, and love is in me. The warmth of the love that my Thea gives me will forever be the flame that burns me through and through.
I like to write....uhm, whatever, you know...and I don't write for you to gimme feedback either, so don't worry about it. I write for my own peace of mind. It helps me vent, and I like to spill my mind on paper when I can't rage about it in person :P Here's some of my stuff. Enjoy.
Btw..it is *copyrighted*, so back off :P
Liv's Rants and Writings.
I moved to Minnesota in August of '07 with Thea and so far I love it. It's definitely a major change from Texas (I will never forget where I came from), but I hope to adjust well. It's beautiful and I'm enjoying it.
I have a passion for photography and in moving here, I'm trying to bring it more into an every day love making experience. If I could empty a roll of film on the sky and trees I would...unfortunately I can't ever seem to capture the real beauty...maybe the lens just doesn't give me enough space to work with..but I'll work it out I think in time.
I'm totally mellow but I still know how to have a good time. Just gotta warm up to the crowd.I'm Deprived.I'm a Workaholic. I've got the best dogs in the world, one in which will bite your face off out of pure love, and no you can NOT have my Mercy! Mercedes and Benz...creative, I know. Mercy is pitt-mix with who knows what. Maybe lab? I'm not sure. Benz is a Terrier of some sort I think. They're regular pains in my ass..more like cramps that come and go...but I love them to death. We also have a cat named Kia (notice a pattern?)
I think weed should be legalized. I don't smoke it anymore...I just think so, you know?? Spontaneousness is a disease of mine that I can't help but thank God for...There's never a dull moment. I looove to do stupid shit out of the blue with no reason, such as running off on random road trips, going out in the woods and being insanely retarded, or just taking looong ass walks to nowhere in particular. It's always been a weak point of mine..but it makes life SO exciting. I'm always up for a good night out.
I enjoy spending time with Thea and watching movies or playing games.
I am an official Greenpeace member and supporter, and I am proud to say that I have been taking my steps and doing my part in saving the earth. My main focus is global warming but I also do what I can regarding the other issues such as the forests, whales, and nuclear. More and more people realize the effects of what is going on every day and are taking part as well. My concern is that in less than 80 years the world is going to be submerged under water due to global warming and the arctics melting faster and faster. I hope that more of you will start thinking about it too and stop thinking "well I probably won't be alive then so why should I care." Anyways, that's just two cents out of my dollar..
That's about it...peace!
The Recipe For Natalie
.. 3 parts Glamour
2 parts Pride
1 part Rebellion
Splash of Vigor
Limit yourself to one serving. This cocktail is strong!
please.....?
I remember the night we met
That night we sat entwined
Under summer skies I looked into your eyes
And you looked into mine
You said, "Youâ€™re not like the rest"
..Oleander holly..
And I nodded
..Crimson feet of Collie..
"No one understands me", you said
And I nodded once again,
..Beautiful and lovely..
As if to agree that all of us are indeed the same
..My baby..
Somehow, you said,
..The only one..
I was different
..Who really understands me..
..Floating hand in hand we..
..Whisper in the moonlight..
..And say that I'm..
..The things you want to see..
..Coriander star child..
For months on end I maintained
..Goddess of the moonlight..
A veneer of sincere interest
..Hold me in the morning..
As if I were listening as you relived every page
..And tell me I'm..
Of self-help and new age that you had read
..The only one alive..
And..I went in for the kill
..Who really understands you..
I'd read the same books
..Tell me pretty stories..
I learned to ape the motions Of a "sensitive" human being
..Say you understand me..
And we were "oh-so-happy"
..My baby..
But you found things to fix
..The things you want to see..
And I knew it was time to move on
..That I could never be..in love..
..In love..
So now you have me completely figured out
You feel sorry for me
I can't express my feelings,
I can't tell the truth
We are all alike
At puberty I was sworn to secrecy
By the international brotherhood
Of lying fickle humans
I can't tell you anything
And I can't commit!
Youâ€™re right!
I can't commit...
To YOU!
..Hold me in the morning..
I will always treasure our time together
..Tell me pretty stories..
I don't feel enough of anything
to harbor the kind of disdain
..Say that you're the only one..
That you'll maintain
You painted me into what you wanted to see,
..My baby..
And that's fine,
..But I could never be..
But you will never know me
..In love..

. . . the integral being is attached to nothing and can relate to everyone with an unstructured attitude. Because of this, her very existence benefits all things.

Belief-O-Matic quiz:Your Results:1. Mahayana Buddhism (100%)
2. Unitarian Universalism (88%)
3. Hinduism (87%)
4. New Age (81%)
5. New Thought (81%)
6. Liberal Quakers (80%)
7. Neo-Pagan (77%)
8. Theravada Buddhism (75%)
9. Jainism (74%)
10. Scientology (73%)
11. Christian Science (Church of Christ, Scientist)(72%)
12. Taoism (69%)
13. Reform Judaism (62%)
14. Sikhism (59%)
15. BahÃ¡'Ã Faith (58%)
16. Mainline to Liberal Christian Protestants (58%)
17. Orthodox Judaism (51%)
18. Orthodox Quaker (46%)
19. Secular Humanism (46%)
20. Islam (42%)
21. Nontheist (31%)
22. Mainline to Conservative Christian/Protestant (25%)
23. Jehovah's Witness (25%)
24. Seventh Day Adventist (19%)
25. Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (Mormons) (15%)
26. Eastern Orthodox (15%)
27. Roman Catholic (15%)
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My Interests

I like long walks on the beach, romantic evenings out, dinner by candlel...wait...no I don't!

I enjoy sitting at home or going out, whatever it is as long as it's with that one person (Thea :D) that makes me feel alive. I enjoy wanting things that I know I will never have, but the act of chasing after it really sets me soaring higher than I would otherwise. I want obstacles. I like to be free, and seen as an individual. I don't want to feel suffocated or held back. It makes me feel better about myself when I hear people complain. Don't ask me why. I can sometimes be so selfish that I forget how this whole "it takes two" system works. I am only jealous if I don't trust you. My idea of a perfect future for myself would be living somewhere far away from everywhere, in a quiet area with mostly nature, and low population. Exploring and discovering myself.

Greatness is not determined by how long you can stay on your feet..but by how many times you can lift yourself up after you fall.

The Purpose: Evolution
The Arena: Daily Life
The Time: Now
The Method: Action
It begins on the ground.
It starts where you are.
It works at every level.

We sit together, the earth and I...
..Until only the earth remains..

It's only possible to be happily ever after on a moment to moment basis.
- The Law of Presence.

We're usually so busy trying to decide on which foot to step off of the curb with, and we're not even halfway down the street yet.

Upon wishing that you were something that you will never even strive to be, you have already failed yourself. - Natalie

Stop wanting to be somebody, stop wanting to change, stop wanting to go anywhere, stop seeking enlightenment. Stop wanting. Sit down. Relax. Be peaceful with how and what you are. Drop all questions, all desires, all searches. In that, you will find that you already are everything that you want to be and you will love being that. - Natalie

Act happy, feel happy, be happy, without a reason in the world. Then you can love, and do what you will.

"Give Peace a Chance" - John Lennon

Pain is a relatively objective, physical phenomenon; suffering is our psychological resistance to what happens. Events may create physical pain, but they do not in themselves create suffering. Resistance creates suffering. Stress happens when your mind resists what is...The only problem in your life is your mind's resistance to life as it unfolds.â€

Sometimes compassion demands action, but this also teaches the wisdom of remaining still and quiet, the action of nonaction.

"Your soulmate is the person you cant stand. What theyre teaching you, at any given moment in your life, is that you haven't mastered yourself yet. Those people who can push your buttons and send you into a frenzy, are people who are divine masters disguised as manipulative people.Instead of getting angry, your task should be to turn to them and bow, and say, 'I honor you as my teacher.' - Dan Millman"

"We need time to ourselves so we don't forget who we are and start thinking we belong to the duties of our every day life." - Natalie

How long
until YOU start caring?

Knowledge is proud that it knows so much; wisdom is humble that it knows no more."

Watch your thoughts,
They turn into words.
Watch your words,
They turn into actions.
Watch your actions,
They turn into habits.
Watch your habits,
They turn into your destiny.

Death isn't sad.
The sad thing is: most people don't really live at all.

Knowledge is knowing.
Wisdom is doing it.

To the mind that is still, the whole universe surrenders.

I'd like to meet:

Socrates, Mahatma Gandhi, Dan Millman, Plato, "the man in the gas station", and the genius that accidently invented the slinky - Richard James.

You look at that river gently flowing by. You notice the leaves rustling with the wind. You hear the birds; you hear the tree frogs. In the distance you hear a cow. You feel the grass. The mud gives a little bit on the river bank. It's quiet; it's peaceful. And all of a sudden, it's a gear shift inside you. And it's like taking a deep breath and going, "Oh yeah, I forgot about this."

If I accept you as you are, I will make you worse; however, if I treat you as though you are what you are capable of becoming, I help you become that

The Classic IQ Test My Result: IQ: 140
Visionary Philosopher
Your mind's strengths allow you to think ahead of the game â€” to imagine or anticipate what should come next in just about any situation. Because you're equally skilled in the numerical and verbal universes of the brain, you can draw from multiple sources of information to come up with great ideas. The timelessness of your vision and the balance between your various skills are what make you a Visionary Philosopher.

In addition to your strengths in math and linguistics, you have a knack for matching and anticipating patterns. These skills and your uncanny ability to detect the underlying blueprint of most of life's situations add to your Visionary Philosopher mind... --> br2 --> Two philosophers who share the same combination of skills you possess are Plato and Benedict Spinoza. Spinoza had insight into how things worked in the world. He could envision a future based on the patterns he saw in life, and used mathematical logic as a structure within which to present his philosophical arguments. With that base he was able to use logic to formulate his theories. Borrowing from his linguistic strengths he wrote eloquent texts and, therefore, was able to bring his philosophical ideas and structure to the rest of the world. His story exemplifies the talents that are present in the Visionary Philosopher intellectual type.

Whatever you decide to do in life, you've got a powerful mix of skills and insight that can be applied in a wide variety of ways. You can expand your mind to understand a situation. Your strong balance of math and verbal skills will help you explain things to others. For example, if you were on an archaeological dig and discovered an object, you could probably use your deductive powers to figure out not only what the object was but also how it was used. Given your ability to put things together, you are more than capable of inventing a life plan that is in synch with your perspective on how things were, how they are, and how they might be one day.

Music:

Pink Floyd
The Beatles
Nine Inch Nails
Morcheeba - Enjoy the ride
AFI
Blink 182
Joe Purdy - blue in the sky
Hedley - Trip

You Are a Prophet Soul
.. You are a gentle soul, with good intentions toward everyone.
Selfless and kind, you have great faith in people.
Sometimes this faith can lead to disappoinment in the long run.
No matter what, you deal with everything in a calm and balanced way.

You are a good interpreter, very sensitive, intuitive, caring, and gentle.
Concerned about the world, you are good at predicting people's feelings.
A seeker of wisdom, you are a life long learner looking for purpose and meaning.
You are a great thinker and communicator, but not necessarily a doer.

Souls you are most compatible with: Bright Star Soul and Dreaming Soul

Movies:

There is a sobering side to eccentricity. Odd behavior can flourish only in a tolerant society and that it often produces radical new ideas by virtue of its willingness to cast off accepted norms. Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light

Television:

The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeing new landscapes, but in having new eyes.
When one realizes
one is asleep,
at that moment
one is already half-awake.
Do not think that just because you see other foot prints, that you are on the right path. -Natalie
You live in illusion and the appearance of things.
There is a reality, but you do not know this.
When you understand this, you will see that you are nothing,
and being nothing, you are everything. That is all.
Naked
Walk by me
I will tear you apart
Strip you of everything
All that you know
I will take it all
Shake, tremble
Naked
I will pull you away
Pull apart your dreams
All that you wish and hope for
I will pull it all apart
Naked
Beg me, get on your knees
Ask for my forgiveness, my permission
Promise me your perfection,
...denied
I will keep it forever
Naked
Lay with me
Offer your purity
Give it all to me
I will take it
I will devour it
Naked

Books:

Way of the Peaceful Warrior
Sacred Journey of the Peaceful Warrior
Journeys of Socrates
Wisdom of the Peaceful Warrior
The Laws of Spirit
Divine Proportion
Of Mice and Men

When you find the way, others will find you.
Passing by on the road,
they will be drawn to your door.
The way that cannot be heard,
will be echoed in your voice.
The way that cannot be seen,
will be reflected in your eyes.

Heroes:

Your Aura is Blue
.. Spiritual and calm, you tend to live a quiet but enriching life.
You are very giving of yourself. And it's hard for you to let go of relationships.
The purpose of your life: showing love to other people
Famous blues include: Angelina Jolie, the Dali Lama, Oprah
Careers for you to try: Psychic, Peace Corps Volunteer, Counselor

parkour
parkour

My Blog

Beautiful Day

For Thea :DI know the day can sometimes get pretty roughAnd sometimes it seems too cloudy to see the sunBut I tell you baby, it's shining down on our loveI know that being apart can make the day seem ...
Posted by Constantly Natalie. on Tue, 22 Jul 2008 09:05:00 PST

Just for you, Amy!

quite the opposite of what she believesand contrary to what she manages to seethe most delicate of desires her heart dares to dreamhas always been closer in reach than it seemsalmost impossible, she a...
Posted by Constantly Natalie. on Wed, 13 Feb 2008 02:08:00 PST

Texas...

I have to say, as much as I love my life up here in Minnesotta....I miss my friends and family in Texas. I can't say that I miss the weather (not even the warmth....yet), because even when it's 2 degr...
Posted by Constantly Natalie. on Thu, 17 Jan 2008 04:00:00 PST

I’ve been tagged

I've been tagged by Amy....so I have to write 10 little facts about myself, then pick 10 people and tag them 1. I know very little about myself, and finding facts about myself to share is ha...
Posted by Constantly Natalie. on Sun, 09 Dec 2007 10:25:00 PST

My puppy is pregnant?!

Awwwwh...as unfortunate as it is considering my current unemployment situation...and lack of money...it's still cute. They're due around Christmas....soo...that's everyones belated xmas present...whet...
Posted by Constantly Natalie. on Sun, 25 Nov 2007 02:49:00 PST

Painfully Loyal

My loyalty to you is that of a dog who has the painful pleasures of watching its master dine in the cuisines of its own deepest hunger. You taunt me with your companionship and the more you beat me th...
Posted by Constantly Natalie. on Thu, 15 Nov 2007 11:19:00 PST

Those days...

those days i thought i'd know foreverhave long passed and gone awaythose days i never cared to cherish enoughhave buried themselves in the depths of my mindand when i try to think of those daysi wonde...
Posted by Constantly Natalie. on Tue, 13 Nov 2007 09:45:00 PST

Bryant McGill - Goodwill Treaty

Become the powerful change the world needswww.goodwilltr eaty.orgI have come to realize we cannot change a person's mind or educate them; this they must do themselves. Through a long study of the conc...
Posted by Constantly Natalie. on Sat, 10 Nov 2007 09:31:00 PST

I just had to post this...

A dear friend of mine wrote this, and I just love reading it. So I figured I would share it. Buddha - "We are what we think. All that we are arises With our thoughts.With our thoughts, w...
Posted by Constantly Natalie. on Fri, 09 Nov 2007 07:59:00 PST

Visions of Perfection

it's a colorful truth with visions of youth,of a promised land that we build in the sandentwined with the healing of our dreamswe sacrifice our passion to simple intentionsof magic to create a paradis...
Posted by Constantly Natalie. on Tue, 09 Oct 2007 12:00:00 PST