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I'm an HSP ("Highly Sensitive Person") by nature, a weird amalgamation of spiritual ascetic and rock n' roller, a former journalist/editor, customer service manager and veterinary technician, Italian and Spanish by ethnicity, mother to a duo of adorable felines (Zoey and Aurora) who own me completely, previous resident of Dis (the capital of Hell, also known as Seattle) and Santa Cruz and currently recovering from PTSD, which includes an ongoing battle with depression, numbness, anger and anxiety. I've also been associated with a very wild sub-culture of life that undermined my sense of worth and self-esteem. Whew, what a mouthful. So what precipitated this walk on the wild side, you ask? Well, it involves a deeply abusive family unit, bizarre formative experiences and wholly dysfunctional adult relationships that included an awful amount of loss and tears. My Piscean sensitivity is either a beautiful blessing or the bane of my existence. I still ache when I remember my 13-year-old lonely self who wanted to swallow a bottle of pills...but she instead turned to music, books, writing and fantasy for solace. That intermittently broken heart and psychic darkness (which never seems to mend or dissipate completely) still exists to this day, hence vanquishing the bleak horizons is a daily chore. However, a stalwart belief in Divine Power -- Jesus, Amma, Saints Therese of Lisieux, Jude, Anne & Dymphna and others that I love and adore -- has dissolved a great deal of my age-old fear and karmic loathing, which saves my hide in the nick of time. And how about the fact that I've permanently estranged myself from nearly my entire biological clan? It's unfortunate, but I've been mourning the lack of real family throughout my entire life. Even so, I am grateful to my parents and eldest siblings for inadvertently teaching me to value my kind heart and innate goodness because they did not invest any stock in doing so. Now I know exactly what does and doesn't fortify the fabric of my existence, and I'm also aware of the process for constructing a life based on spiritual principles. But please do not mistake me for an underdog or loser just because I've visited the bowels of Hades: I'm strong and steely and will cut you off at the knees if you tamper with my normally good nature. The fuse is long but WATCH OUT if it's detonated! With that said, my goal is not to be identified with the anger and not to lash out in the midst of my psychic pain, which is a terrible tendency that I need to curb if I want my spirit to flourish and be fully nourished. Conversely, I will protect the underdogs at all costs -- they don't tell me I have a Joan of Arc complex for nothing -- but I refuse to align myself with the downtrodden who willingly put themselves there and then remain on ground level. BE PROUD OF WHO YOU ARE; YOU ARE A CHILD OF THE UNIVERSE! So what if you're not like everyone else? Why are you conforming to dogmatic, sub-par standards if they don't make you happy? Being irreverent is a profound gift. At this time, I am living on the shores of Long Island Sound in a New Haven suburb called Branford, which is rather peaceful and idyllic. My cozy apartment is my sanctuary, and I would not trade it for anything right now. Life sucks in the worst possible way at the moment but I refuse to give up, and my quirky sense of humor keeps me afloat; you'll find me laughing at the strangest things...ancient memories, spatial quotations, an odd expression or perhaps something that never even occurred in the physical world. Whatever gets me through the night, right? Um, what else? I am a personal assistant to a duo of astrologers and their equally cosmic associates, all of whom manage a business that boasts self-care and spiritual products for the seekers of metaphysical truth with an occasional dollop of megalomaniacal bullshit. If you want a astrological reading, a numerological talisman, a lesson in feng shui or a book about the archangels, we've got the essential esoteric mojo for you. Er, whatever. Ah...then there's the aforementioned creative spark. It's true that music is my *primary* sanctuary, a cradle for my thought-addled head and tempestuous emotions. I have loved music ever since I was yanked out of the womb, and I sing as well...in fact, my voice, which is supposedly not unlike Fiona Apple's, is certainly a cut or two above my axe prowess (I adore guitars, especially Fenders, but I can't play 'em to save my life). If you read my "music" section of this profile, you'll realize that I thrive on rock and roll and always have done so. I may not be a natural musician in this incarnation, but I'd like to believe that I have an incredibly intuitive ear for what's good and what isn't; for example, this talent served me well as a rock journalist in Seattle during the "grunge" movement and, yes, I can listen to a number of different guitarists and tell you who's who, what they're playing and why. As for my thespian skills, they are finely developed -- I don't want to sound conceited, but experienced actors who've witnessed my performances have compared me to Jodie Foster -- yet it's not my heart's desire to act at this juncture. Photography is fun and expressive, but that is not my quintessential focus, either. I am primarily a writer who's been published since the age of 11: There are publications and anthologies all over the world that contain hundreds of my stories, poetry, narratives and journalistic pieces. Lately I've been developing an idea for a book on spiritual warfare and would like to begin a play or memoir as well, both of which seem to be my final artistic frontier. Anyway, if you want to be my friend on MySpace -- or anywhere else for that matter -- please love and be immersed in three things: MUSIC, SPIRITUALITY and ANIMALS (I work tirelessly for animal rights/welfare and am not ashamed to admit it). Sayonara for now and rock on with love and light! And, remember...we're on this planet as a human family, so let's start acting like it.
