Scott Free profile picture

Scott Free

Call nothing thine except thy soul. Love not what thou art only what thou may become.

About Me

Me: (Humming, working on a ship in a bottle) Hum didda hee-hee. Hua-hua! Hum didda hee-hee. Hua-hua! Hummm(Girl enters) Girl: Hi!Me: (Preoccupied with model)...Hi! Didda hee-hee. Hua-hua!Girl: Ummmm...Ahhhh...Ummm...(Leaves hurridly, then returns)...Scott?Me: Yes?Girl: I don't get you!Me: Oh?Girl: Are you mad?Me: (Gruffly) NOO!! (Calmer) No.Girl: Good. Because I want to like you, but I just don't understand where you're coming from.Me: Sure...Uh...What's not to get, though? I just am. I hang out.Girl: Ohh. Oh. I know. It's just that, well, you know, I don't really get you.Me: Well, okay...Maybe I can help. To start with, uh, I'm a man. Is THAT what's confusing you?Girl: Uhh...No.Me: Is it that I write and can use a variety of large words?Girl: Uhh...I guess that's a start...Me: Well...I've undergone a complex personal evolution wherein painful confusion has given way to what I like to think of as some degree of wisdom culminating in my current Zarasthustrian sense of self. Is that it?Girl: Nooo...If that helps you, its good, but...Me: I don't know what...Is it that I often panic when making sandwiches?Girl: Yeah! Well maybe its that kind of thing...Me: Is it that I smell conspiracy in everything and I don't know what I mean most of the time?Girl: Uh, that's perhaps a small piece of the puzzle...but...Me: ...Is it an odor?Girl: No. Well...No. Well...maybe it's the OTHER Scott I don't get!Me: (Losing all patience) Ohhhh brother! Like a Zippo lighter without any flint! I can't believe it...(exits)Scott: (Scott enters the scene humming) Hum didda hee-hee. (Sees model.) Ugghh...Girl: Scott...I don't get you!Scott: (Confidently) Nobody does! I'm the wind, baby! (Exits quickly, still humming). Hum didda hee-hee. (Cut)

My Interests

absurdism, acting, adult swim, agnosticism, anarchy, ancient history, art, astrology, atheism, auteur theory, black and white movies, books, boots, cats, conspiracies, dada, deconstruction, existentialism, film noir, french new wave, genre, gonzo journalism, graphic novels, heresy, history, horror films, horror hosts, humanism, illuminati, irish culture, irony, libertarian socialism, literature, metaphysics, movies, music, new orleans, nihlism, old-time radio, philosophy, poetry, political science, politics, pop culture, postmodernism, pulp heroes, punk, reading, red hair, relativism, richard belzer, rock and roll, russian literature, sarcasm, secular humanism, silent films, situationist, socialism, socratic method, songwriting, superheroes, surrealism, tarot, the chukker, trans-humanism, vodka, wold newton universe, writing.

I'd like to meet:

alan moore, alex jones, art bell, bernadette peters, brigitte bardot, david cronenburg, david lynch, deborah harry, joan jett, kurt vonnegut, leonard cohen, lisa hartman, mamie van doren, nancy sinatra, nick cave, quentin tarantino, ray bradbury, richard belzer, tom waits, tuesday weld.

Music:

bongwater, catfight!, concrete blonde, courtney love, dan bern, david bowie, dc moon, dead kennedys, deborah harry, joan jett, johnny cash, leonard cohen, nancy sinatra, nick cave, the replacements, tom waits.

Movies:

breakfast at tiffany's, fight club, rocky horror picture show, un chien andalou, videodrome, zardoz, citizen kane, metropolis, the blue angel.

Television:

the prisoner, the twilight zone, the outer limits, the night gallery, the night stalker, absolutely fabulous, the adventures of brisco county jr., alfred hitchcock presents, the avengers, black adder, are you being served?, babylon 5, dark shadows, dinosaurs, duckman, dr. who, star trek, MST3K, Xena, the x-files, buffy the vampire slayer, angel, remember wenn, SCTV, tales from the crypt, twin peaks, the young ones, zorro, the lone ranger.

Books:

Anything by alan moore, aldous huxley, aleister crowley, ambrose bierce, charles beaumont, dostoevsky, douglas adams, edgar allan poe, fredric brown, george orwell, guy debord, h.p. lovecraft, hunter s. thompson, kafka, kurt vonnegut, leo buscalia, leonard cohen, linda goodman, philip k. dick, ray bradbury, robert anton wilson, rod serling, samuel beckett, sandra bernhard, satre, voltaire, or wilhelm reich

Heroes:

alan moore, aldous huxley, aleister crowley, alex jones, ambrose bierce, andy warhol, art bell, bernadette peters, brigitte bardot, buster keaton, charles beaumont, charlie chaplin, courtney love, dan bern, david bowie, david cronenburg, david lynch, dc moon, deborah harry, devo, don quixote, dostoevsky, douglas adams, edgar allan poe, fantomas, fredric brown, fritz lang, george orwell, guy debord, h.p. lovecraft, hank williams, hitchcock, hunter s. thompson, jayne mansfield, jean harlow, joan jett, johnny cash, kafka, kids in the hall, kurt vonnegut, leo buscalia, leonard cohen, linda goodman, lisa hartman, mamie van doren, murnau, nancy sinatra, nick cave, nikola tesla, orson welles, philip k. dick, quentin tarantino, ray bradbury, richard belzer, robert anton wilson, rod serling, salvador dali, samuel beckett, sandra bernhard, satre, tuesday weld, vincent price, vincent van gogh, voltaire, wilhelm reich

My Blog

Untitled Fiction Project Chapter Nine

Shelley comes out into the front office, glances into the cabinet, and snaps her fingers lightly. Olivia: "[Eyebrows?]" Shelley: "[Head flick.]" Olivia gets up and follows Shelley into the back office...
Posted by Scott Free on Sun, 27 May 2007 03:04:00 PST

Today's Videodrome Viewing

Having a week off from work is great:We Don't Live Here AnymoreI saw this a bit ago, but forgot to write it up here. It was good, and yet it was annoying. The acting was good, and yet it was&annoying....
Posted by Scott Free on Wed, 23 May 2007 06:22:00 PST

Untitled Fiction Project Chapter Eight

And the voice said:Years ago, Ro Jin lived with his wife and three children in a little house on the canal. His wife Ro Fan was known as a great beauty, and also for her startling hands, long and th...
Posted by Scott Free on Mon, 21 May 2007 06:43:00 PST

Another Videodrome Review

WendigoOh my crap, where to begin with this&"movie." It has so many serious problems, I can't even decide which one is primarily at fault, but I think it's a "flawed in its inception" issue, because ...
Posted by Scott Free on Thu, 17 May 2007 08:26:00 PST

"What Do You Mean I'm Not On the List?"

Jerry FalwellDeadAnd, right about now, suprised as hell......
Posted by Scott Free on Wed, 16 May 2007 08:23:00 PST

This is What Videodrome is Supposed to be For...

I think I need to get this blog back to what I had originally intended to do: short little reviews of some of the films I've been watching as I work to transfer my massive 12000+ collection of VHS tap...
Posted by Scott Free on Tue, 08 May 2007 12:52:00 PST

Untitled Fiction Project Chapter Seven

Shelley told Olivia to sit on the brown couch in the office, so Olivia is sitting there, rubbing the strap of her bag with her thumb, watching Marie stick Post-It flags on a take-out menu. Who are the...
Posted by Scott Free on Tue, 08 May 2007 12:40:00 PST

...Do It Yourself

Well, you probably missed it. It didn't appear in your Dayrunner's list of bank holidays. Hallmark neglected to promote it. And while you may have inadvertently celebrated, you probably didn't mean t...
Posted by Scott Free on Mon, 07 May 2007 01:22:00 PST

Untitled Fiction Project Chapter Six

Outside, the light has guttered down to the horizon behind the scrub pines, and the air is cool and soft like a sheet. Inside, it's warmer. A loaf of bread is sitting on the counter, cut into, waiting...
Posted by Scott Free on Thu, 03 May 2007 12:55:00 PST

Reader Response Time

I got this email today from a faithful reader about my previous post(let's call her S.B. but most of you will probably recognize her). Let's just say it has renewed my faith in womankind. Although som...
Posted by Scott Free on Tue, 01 May 2007 01:18:00 PST