Brunoâ„¢ profile picture

Brunoâ„¢

How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand.

About Me

Aloha. I go by Bruno to most of my friends and have accepted my namesake. It is not my choice of names, but I got it. I'm pretty sure I don't look like a Bruno either. People say they have a dog named Bruno. I say I have a dog named Kevin. I am one of those people that you can never really put a finger on. I hate the formality of meeting and getting to know someone. I feel like I know you when I see you the second time, and act accordingly.I like to spend my time at the beach and get off just cruising the island. Hawaii has always been my home and always will be. Even if I move away and see the world, As I occasionally do. I sit and watch wave sets before I get in. Just like the Aloha Spirit, surfing is a way of life. I look for the humor in EVERYTHING. I make backgammon moves in my head during conversations and have random conversations in the shower. I think you get the most valuable psychic information in the shower. I remember more than I should. My memory is uncanny. I practice neurocyberoptics and convergent eyesight. I still have an imaginary friend. He says Punaluu bakery is better than yours. I just told him to shut-up. I believe in a higher power, but could care less what it looks like. I gotta God and I keep him hidden. Wouldn't want someone to sneak up and worship him when I wasn't looking. I have been in bands and been onstage. I have made numerous television shows with my friends over a 10 year period and put them all on the air. I write comedy and often just tell punchlines. I jocked at the only rock station on the Big Island and tried to make people laugh with sound effects and voices. I am a restaurant guy too. Many moons in management. Too many perhaps. In Hawaii, most people have two jobs, many have three. Locals can't afford to live here much longer, but don't get me started on that. I love tattoos. I look for funny people. I hang around with funny people if I can help it. If you want to laugh about anything, I'm your man.I enjoy writing blogs on here and reading other people's. I Like eating at a fast food restaurant and putting my drink on someone else's tray. They flip out. It is hard to do with a straight face, but try it anyway.If all else fails......Build a Death Star.
The joys of Surfing !..
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My Interests


Myspace Layouts for Myspace :: Music Video Codes
Freezing my ass off on the tip-top of Mauna Kea? Comedy. Ah to laugh. I have written and produced my own shows on public access. I have been fortunate enough to be a cast member of Studio X, The Groove Tube, The Cordless Banana and the Fox Bogart Show.Working in the restaurants gave me a chance to travel around the country. I am happy to be home. As an on-air personality for the Island's only rock station, I have been fortunate to be on the inside of the music scene. The station was sold and the programming changed. Now we have 1000 Jawaiian stations, 1 country and 1 oldies. Thanks to that move, I am currently not on the air. Motorcycles have been a major part of my life. I love the rice burners. It started with a CB350 and I hope it never ends. Wear a helmet dumb-ass. Yeah you. I have always had a desire to expand my mind. While other kids were wrestling in the yard or swimming at the beach, I was waiting in line at the palm reader. I am a skeptic. I am also an intuit. It is one of my favorite things. I don't see ghosts and can't tell you what your next job is. Unless I am told those things. I am usually not. I'm more of a medium than a fortune teller. And I am comfortable with it. I do it whether or not I try. Spend ten minuets with me and you'll see what I mean.I guess I was influenced mostly by Bill Murray, Alan Alda's character 'Hawkeye Pierce' on M*A*S*H*, Robin Williams, and John Ritter. I couldn't have a drum kit in the house, so I got a drum pad. I taught myself how to play on it. I still love to play today. I know how to play guitar, I just haven't taught my hands yet. I lost my best friend in an unnecessary accident. I mourn her still. I talk to her when I think she's busy doing something else. I hope to yapple-dapple her all over the place so we have some new stuff to laugh about when I get to see her again. Anything that has to do with the beach - I'm in. Just like I told your sister. twice. I like to get out on the shore-break just as much as outside. I wish Kadiema was a recognized sport. Snorkel, dive, bikini watch and sleep. It's all good. I write in a book I will never publish and think palm trees are best. I will do anything for a joke.
Your Hawaiian Name is:
Kane Nahele What's your Hawaiian Name?My Hawaiian name is Kalikikopa. But this is fun anyway. Who best symbolizes the care-free life style of Hawaii than our captivating Hawaiian Hula Girl; who embodies every man's fascination and every woman's envy? The hula girl is charming and alluring and always carries within her the spirit of 'Aloha'.She is a recognizable image throughout the Pacific; a beautiful woman scantily clad in her grass hula skirt and coconut shell top. The hula girl image is splashed about here and there, turning up in different places all the time. A Hawaiian hula girl will grace the cover of many magazines, post cards, posters, photographs, travel literature and when a hula girl is not busy greeting tourists with leis or serving Mai Tais on the beach, she simply lazes among the palms and gazes longingly out to sea while strumming her ukulele and striking the classic hula girl pose.The hula girl sums up the perfect image of what Hawaii has to offer with her welcoming smile and easy, fluid movements. The hula girl as we know her today is the creation of popular culture. In the early 1900s is when the 'modern' Hawaiian hula girl first appeared in her now traditional little grass skirt and flower patterned halter. With Hawaii's growing popularity came the interpretation of every visiting artist's eye. Occasionally you'd find the hula girl bare breasted which to some seemed rather unconventional during the mid to late 1900s. But that didn't stop her nor did this pollute the beautiful hula girl image; of course, having a beautiful flower lei strewn across her chest helped avert the wandering eyes. Being from another culture, the hula girl was allowed to bend the rules a bit.No matter what style, shape or persona the hula girl took on, she remained a stable attractive figure throughout the years to come. Her commercial exploitation never swayed from her good-natured acceptance as Hawaii's instantly recognizable image. Throughout her metamorphosis, she has remained sparkling and welcoming, which is, after all, her main function.
by sfboarders This is how I eats me flapjacks. I invented it. That's my story and I'm stickin' to it. Vietnamese Happy Meal.

Music:

J. Mraz, Brian Setzer, The Cure, Dada, Live, Red Hot Chili Peppers, John Mayer, Sugarcubes, Bruddah IZ, Beastie Boys, Crowded House, Dave Matthews, Smashin Pumpkins, Sugar Ray, The Used, Maroon 5, Rob Zombie, B-52's, U2, Lori Diamond, Everclear, Adam Ant, The Smiths, New Edition, Tom Jones, Sinatra, The Clash, Johnny Hates Jazz, The Fixx, Frankie Goes to Hollywood, Toby Keith, Big and Rich, Grandmaster Flash and the Furious five, ABC, Ultravox, Ben Folds, Fat Boy Slim, Jimmy Buffet and the Coral Refer Band, Brian Setzer and the Radiation Ranch, The Ocean Blue, Prefab Sprout, Anything you have ever bounced to in a roller rink in highschool. Except for backwards skate.

Movies:

The Matrix. Saving private ryan. Logan's Run. Three days Of The Condor. Top secret. Holy Grail, Life of Brian, SuperTroopers, Spaceballs, History of the World, Blazing Saddles, The Princess Bride, Caddyshack, Fletch, Three Amigos, Summer Rental (i was in that one), Planes, Trains and Automobiles, Too Much Sun, What Dreams May Come, Awakenings, What About Bob?, The Last Emporer, Lost in Translation (Deleni mukate mono itten da!), Star Wars 1-6, Amityville Horror (the new one), The Exorcist, Pulp Fiction, Four Rooms, Resoviour Dogs, To', Abre Los Ohos, Amilie, Shallow Grave, Men at work, Dirty Work, Scarface, A Beautiful Mind, Back to School, Office Space, Lord of The Rings, The Apple Dumpling Gang, Contact, Money For Nothing, Baby's Day Out, Rocketman, Arsnic and Old Lace, The Thin Man, Pal Joey, Natural Born Killers, Every single Jackie Chan film Ever Made but especially; Who Am I, Rumble In The Bronx and the original Drunken Master, The Blob, Big Fish, Gia, Van Wilder, Up in Smoke, Nice Dreams, Escape to Witch Mountain, Beetleguise, Firewalk With Me, Dogma, The Edge, Silence of the Lambs, Forrest Gump, Big, Turner and Hooch, Brian's Song (not crying at that movie means you are an alien), Baseketball, Better Off Dead, Hot Pursuit, Meatballs, The Godfather 1&2, O Brother where art thou, all The Thin Man's and the list goes on. And on.

Television:

Scrubs. CNN Headline News. (even though they never talk about Hawaii.) Dog The Bounty Hunter.- His Office is down the street and I recognize lots of guys getting busted. Love John Edward's work on Cross Country. SNL Conan O'Brien Mad TV. Anything with Dave Foley. A&E, TNT, Spike, HBO on demand. I like to watch Sylvia Browne but do not really care for her personality. Croc Hunter! XMC Extreme Elimination. Land of the Lost. James Bond reruns all day long. The Kids From CAPER. Kung Fu Theatre. Creature Feature. Twilight Zone. The first two Star Trek's. Golden Girls. The Kids in the Hall. A+++++. Ab Fab. Dr. Katz. Anything NOT about celebrties. Public Access. Superbowl (for the commercials).

Books:

I read a lot and am always up for a good title. Some of the more recent are: Neuro-Cyber-Optics (Don Tolman), The Memoirs of Cleopatra, The Lovely Bones, The Five people you meet in heaven, Servant of the Bones,4th of July, Kiss the Girls, Along came a Spider, Intensity, 1st Degree, 2nd Chance, Gerald's Game, Insomnia, It, The Stand, Desperation, The Langoliers, The book about the plane crash in the Andes, The Vampire Cronicles, The Mayfair Witches, The Crucible, The Scarlet Letter, The long walk Home, Angels and Demons, The Davinci Code, Ten Past Midnight, The Secret Window, The Gift, Neuropsychology, Movie Magic, The confession of O.J. Simpson, Police Agility and Restraint Tecniques, Dennis Miller Rants, Christine, Misery, Story Sunday, Backwoods, Jim Jones Bio, Manson in his own words, The Pied Piper, Zodiac, The Great Cheese Conspiricy, The 500 Hats of Bartholomew Cubbins, and HOLY CRAP I COULD NEVER WRITE ALL THESE BOOKS. WHAT THE HELL WAS I THINKING? Everything by: john edward, sylvia brown, stephen king, james patterson, dan brown, echo bodine, don simpson, The Lord of the Rings Books, Ufo books, anthpology books, trivia out the ass, guiness book, Alec Guiness books, book 'em Danno and I guess you get the point. I read a lot. A whole lot!

Heroes:

Steve Irwin..

My Blog

The power of WHAT compelled you?

I was just thinking about the strange things we do, as a collective, without apparent reason or rational. It all started a moment ago.  I sit here in a towel with wet shoulders and hair...
Posted by Bruno" on Wed, 23 May 2007 08:04:00 PST

Up two blocks then left at the bleach blond.

I decided to get out into the sunshine this week.  I live for the sun. I have never been properly diagnosed, but feel I truly suffer from seasonal affective disorder. It means that when there is...
Posted by Bruno" on Fri, 06 Apr 2007 07:15:00 PST

Mooned on the golf course.

A Birthday Wish Dear Holly Jean, I have a giant walnut on my desk that I bought at the flea market a few Sundays ago. I keep change in it. I have to admit that it makes me laugh every time I look at i...
Posted by Bruno" on Sun, 18 Mar 2007 08:30:00 PST

I can make that face if I have to.

When I was a kid, I knew I wanted to be funny. I was sure that being funny was the best way to make and keep friends. I found that when people are laughing, they are less likely to be upset, or even w...
Posted by Bruno" on Sun, 11 Mar 2007 12:43:00 PST

You know who you look like?

Someone told me today that I look like Rob Schneider. I didn't know how to react. Not for the reason you may be thinking. Not at all. The funny thing about being told I look like someone else, is tha...
Posted by Bruno" on Sun, 18 Feb 2007 11:54:00 PST

You gotta be this tall... to get pennies from heaven.

Children are strange. I know... I was one. I'm sure I was pretty good at it too. That doesn't mean, unfortunately, that I can understand them as the adult that I have become. When I decided to come t...
Posted by Bruno" on Sat, 17 Feb 2007 09:14:00 PST

God's waiting room.

Spoiled by noon. So it is Sunday. And so it is blog day. I just came back from a morning at the grocery store. That my friends, was insane. While I have found that the things here on the mainland are ...
Posted by Bruno" on Tue, 30 Jan 2007 05:10:00 PST

Getting a leg-up on the Japanese.

So it's Sunday. Blog day. I was reading Jason Mraz's blog about his trip to India last week and it got me thinking about the numerous countries I have been fortunate enough to visit. I could write abo...
Posted by Bruno" on Sun, 21 Jan 2007 11:25:00 PST

Dryer Sheets

I love getting high and doing laundry. You do funny things when you smoke a joint and wash clothes on a Sunday afternoon. You think about people and things that are dying to get some attention from y...
Posted by Bruno" on Wed, 17 Jan 2007 08:22:00 PST

By popular demand: The Thanksgiving message repeated.

I sent this to a friend after I sat and made it for about an hour.  Another friend said he saw it and wanted a copy.  I made a copy (from scratch) but this time I copied it and sent it to ab...
Posted by Bruno" on Sun, 07 Jan 2007 11:20:00 PST