excuse me while i drink this hater-ade
Facts on ME:
If at first you don't succeed, you are obviously not Me.
I am allowed to talk about Fight Club.
Crop circles are my way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the fuck down.
I am not lactose intolerant; I just refuse to put up with lactose's shit.
When Bruce Banner gets angry he transforms into the Incredible Hulk. When the Incredible Hulk gets angry he transforms into Me.
When I delete files from My computer, I don't send them to the Recycle Bin. I send them to hell!
When I do a push-up, I am not lifting myself up; I am pushing the Earth down.
I can unscramble an egg.
I have never used pickup lines, because I just pick.
I am the reason why Waldo is hiding.
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Me.
Superman owns a pair of My pajamas and matching bed sheets.
Geico saved 15 percent by switching to Me.
At birth, I delivered Myself and slapped the doctor
I can speak braille.
I refer to myself in fourth person.
the only thing we have to fear is fear itself... The only thing fear has to fear is Me.
When I do long division, there are no remainders.
I am the only one who can touch MC Hammer.
