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CAIDWI

....what he said

About Me



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Contact TablesWE'RE ALL IN THE GUTTER, BUT SOME OF US ARE LOOKING AT THE STARS...'OSCAR WILDE'Well well well, gotta say about me is not all complex n s***, but if I was anybody else, and didnt have the family I did....Id probably be a monk.! A very bad one at that. I like to tell the truth but that surely doesnt mean I am sarcastic and "dont care what people think about that.I dont like to hurt anybodies feelings like that.At the same time, I am not a saint. Im actually very mellow, and some take that for granted...or try. My interest are many, economics and sociology and newly, race relations being the subjects I am trying to teach myself about until I get back in school. I watch Submedia.tv, NGTV.com, and BBC because, due to a random guy telling me about how so inaccurate they were about the 911 conspiracy....did I say conspiracy, yeah, every black man believes everything is a conspiracy..lol! I like that though, I like that.I am an aspiring actor, I am not always financially able to recieve the teaching Id like to recieve 'consistantly', so I do things like just living. Living everyday, and taking notice to it, how others live, what others think about what I think about, I talk to homeless ppl and mentally disabled ppl constantly because I can always sit and just enjoy the day more, and listen to whats on their minds about life. I LOVE me some theatre actors, because when they ask you whats going on in your life, they got this look on thier faces that projects "Im all ears, senses" I cant really put it in words entirely, I just love them to death, very muli-leveled, they are like "pro living" to me. I aspire to train the way they have, and learn more of who I am. And I know its not a skip down the yellow brick road, I know that much. At the same time Its fun, based on my past classes realizations and current living expeiences. ========================================================= I read about ironic polotics, still trying to learn the difference in a democrat & a republican and democracy; and autobiograhies of past classic actors lives. Because I believe if you aspire be a shiny delicious, fullfilling apple, you gotta read & soak in the story of the seed. Hope my obvious love of metephore makes dam sense. I am not always consistant with these hobbies, but I write poetry, keep a journal, draw, watch classic films, hike in the hollywood mountain trails and fryman canyon, comb the internet for polotics I am not aware of, and I am trying to write my first script or really story (still on page 1) since I CONSTANTLY daydream about things and doing what I want to do as an artist.And whatever falls under the ball of creative.I dig art like grafitti street art, music of all genres' from old school Ice Cube to System of a Down , from Stevie Wonder to John Lennon, from Sade to Earth Wind & Fire, from Goapele to Mudvayne. And I usually post song on my profile for SOME reason, unless it just makes me shake my ass....in private. HA! I love abstrct art especially which is also grafitti art. I wish I could get tattoos but I cant cuz of my aspirations, so I put 1/2 inch plugz in my ears instead; oil paintings, junk art, penitentiary tattoos & poems, if you want to see or hear anything that has a descriptive story to it, look that s*** up. Its very interesting. I once kept a journal in there from 1 year and 4 months...and I lost it, but what I gained from it was a lot of knowledge of self, and a LOT of stress relieved...at the same time Im constantly told I dont seem the type or 'look' like Ive ever had a grungy past.Didnt Martha Stewart go to jail? Who's Kenneth Lay? (smile) I gained a high appreciation of the stars in the sky on constant clear nights from that. As well as fully realizing that that squeezed a reformed and patient man out of me.Another reason I left my hometown is because of my perceptions. And realizing while I LOVE that place (when Im not living there) it is very very closed in on whats going on in the world & lost on thier own great attributes ,and small towns @ least mine) seem to train you to be too introspective in an unhealthy way...I didnt like that. I had to learn to live outside of myslef, and be more than being temporarilly emotionally handicapped and oblivious to what "ELSE" is outside my city. And most importantly, like john lennon, martin luther king, jf kennedy and others realizing that I had power Already within myself to make some changes within and in the world if I keep on pushin. And also realizing that what I aspire to do, dosent necessarily validate that, but makes me more economically efficient. So here I started,at 29 years old... moving to L.A. to be an actor.And learn just how MAny licks it takes to get to the center of my totsie pop.....does that sound stupid?...YEAH, a lil....so what. (smile) A drunk man is the best person to talk to, cuz if you can get through the stuff that makes you embarrased to talk to him, youll realized a lot of simple truths about you, and the goings on of simply your surroundings upon just that initial meeting,(not EVERY time.And also be able to help somebody for that short time, to not fall down and break his ass from all the laughing hes' doing.........hopefully he dosent wiegh more than me, since Ill be laughing too. Estas Ok? Im ok. ===

My Interests

THEATRE (because i have yet to go to more than 1 damn play!)90'S MOVIES, FAMOUS BLACK & WHITE FILMS I HAVENT SEEN YET, HUMPHREY BOGART FILMS, READING BIOGRAPHIES, MEETING INTERSTING PEOPLE WITH THEIR OWN VIEWS AND NOT JUST FOR THE SAKE OF SHOWING AN EGO, JUST THEMSELVES, MY REAL FRIENDS FROM THE PAST, GRAFTTII ART!, DOGS, POETRY , IRA ALDRIDGE, UTA HAGEN , STELLA ADLER, MARLON BRANDO LIVES.....SOME POLITICS I THINK I SHOULD KNOW, THEATRE HISTORY...and learning all the hell I can since highschool wasnt where I didnt want to learn it...LOL!AND IM SURE THERES MORE...BUT IT WILL COME... dave chapelle-rick james bitch

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I'd like to meet:

Like I said, I love theatre actors!Anyone who digs classic movies & 80's movies. And just actors in general. Anyone who loves life and takes notice to it, and who would enjoy shareing thier experience... JUDY GARLAND 1922-1969 AUDREY HEPBURN 1929-1993 1910-1989 MARY TYLER MOORE 1936- ELIZABETH TAYLOR 1932-

Music:


Movies:

ROCK HUDSON 1925-1985 HUMPHREY BOGART 1899-1957 CLARK GABLE 1907-1960 CHARLIE CHAPLIN 1889-1977 SIDNEY POITIER 1927- WOODY ALLEN 1935- CLINT EASTWOOD 1930 JOHN WAYNE 1907-1979TITLE--DIRECTORTideland--Terry Gilliam (favorite!) Running With Scissors--Ryan Murphy (favorite!) BELLY--Hype Williams American Beauty--Sam Mendes Finding Neverland--Marc Forster Fight Club--David Fincher Meet John Doe--Frank Kapra A Raisin Under the Sun--Daniel Petrie The Big Labowski--Joel Coen Tequila Sunrise--Robert Towne The Golden Child--Michael Ritchie Find Me Guilty--Sidney Lumet Crash--Paul Haggis World Trade Center--Oliver Stone Adaptation--Spike Jonze Training Day--Antoine Fuqua Twelve Monkeys--Terry Gilliam The Fifth Element--Nicolas Coquard Blade Runner--Ridley Scott (favorite!) Down & Out in Beverly Hills--Paul Mazursky Guys & Dolls--Joseph L. Mankiewicz Goodfellas--Martin Scorsese (favorite!) The Unusual Suspects--Bryan Singer Reservoir Dogs--Quentin Tarantino The Green Mile--Frank Darabont Meet Joe Black--Martin Brest Children of Men--Alfonso Cuarón

Television:


Books:

Marlon Brando:"Songs My Mother Taught Me. David Mamet:True & False:"Heresy and Common Sence for the Actor Steven King:"Needful Things" Dennis Rodman:"Bad as I Wanna Be

Heroes:

Courtesy of Poetology.com "The Black American"by Smokey Robinson "I love being Black. I love being called Black. I love being an American. I love being a Black American, but as a Black man in this country I think it’s a shame That every few years we get a change of name. Since those first ships arrived here from Africa that came across the sea There were already Black men in this country who were free. And as for those that came over here on those terrible boats, They were called niggah and slave And told what to do and how to behave. And then master started trippin' and doing his midnight tippin', Down to the slave shacks where he forced he and Great-Great Grandma to be together, And if Great-Great Grandpa protested, he got tarred and feathered. And at the same time, the Black men in the country who were free, Were mating with the tribes like the Apache and the Cherokee. And as a result of all that, we're a parade of every shade. And as in this late day and age, you can be sure, They ain't too many of us in this country whose bloodline is pure. But, according to a geological, geographical, genealogy study published in Time Magazine, The Black African people were the first on the scene, So for what it's worth, the Black African people were the first on earth And through migration, our characteristics started to change, and rearrange, To adapt to whatever climate we migrated to. And that's how I became me, and you became you. So, if we gonna go back, let's go all the way back, And if Adam was Black and Eve was Black, Then that kind of makes it a natural fact that everybody in America is an African American. Everybody in Europe is an African European; everybody in the Orient is an African Asian And so on and so on, That is, if the origin of man is what we’re gonna go on. And if one drop of Black blood makes you Black like they say, Then everybody's Black anyway. So quit trying to change my identity. I'm already who I was meant to be I'm a Black American, born and raised. And brother James Brown wrote a wonderful phrase, "Say it loud, I'm Black and I'm proud! Say it loud, I'm Black and I'm proud!" Cause I'm proud to be Black and I ain't never lived in Africa, And ‘cause my Great-Great Granddaddy on my Daddy’s side did, don't mean I want to go back. Now I have nothing against Africa, It's where some of the most beautiful places and people in the world are found. But I've been blessed to go a lot of places in this world, And if you ask me where I choose to live, I pick America, hands down. Now, by and by, we were called Negroes, and after while, that name has vanished. Anyway, Negro is just how you say “black” in Spanish. Then, we were called colored, but shit, everybody’s one color or another, And I think it’s a shame that we hold that against each other. And it seems like we reverted back to a time when being called Black was an insult, Even if it was another Black man who said it, a fight would result, Cause we’ve been so brainwashed that Black was wrong, So that even the yellow niggahs and black niggahs couldn’t get along. But then, came the 1960s when we struggled and died to be called equal and Black, And we walked with pride with our heads held high and our shoulders pushed back, And Black was beautiful. But, I guess that wasn’t good enough, Cause now here they come with some other stuff. Who comes up with this shit anyway? Was it one, or a group of niggahs sitting around one day? Feelin’ a little insecure again about being called Black And decided that African American sounded a little more exotic. Well, I think you were being a little more neurotic. It’s that same mentality that got “Amos and Andy” put off the air, Cause’ they were embarrassed about the way the character’s spoke. And as a result of that action, a lot of wonderful Black actors ended up broke. When we were just laughin’ and have fun about ourselves. So I say, “fuck you if you can’t take a joke.” You didn’t see the “Beverly Hillbilly’s” being protested by white folks. And if you think, that cause you think that being called African American set all Black people’s mind at ease….. Since we affectionately call each other “niggah”, I affectionately say to you, “niggah Please”. How come I didn’t get the chance to vote on who I’d like to be? Who gave you the right to make that decision for me? I ain’t under your rule or in your dominion And I am entitled to my own opinion. Now there are some African Americans here, But they recently moved here from places like Kenya, Ethiopia, Zambia, Zimbabwe, and Zaire. But, now the brother who’s family has lived in the country for generations, Occupying space in all the locations New York, Miami, L.A., Detroit, Chicago- Even if he’s wearing a dashiki and sporting an afro. And, if you go to Africa in search of your race, You’ll find out quick you’re not an African American, You’re just a Black American in Africa takin’ up space. Why you keep trying to attach yourself to a continent, Where if you got the chance and you went, Most people there would even claim you as one of them; as a pure bread daughter or son of them. Your heritage is right here now, no matter what you call yourself or what you say And a lot of people died to make it that way. And if you think America is a leader on inequality and suffering and grievin’ How come there so many people comin’ and so few leavin’? Rather than all this ‘find fault with America’ fuck you promotin’, If you want to change something, use your privilege, get to the polls! Commence to votin’! God knows we’ve earned the right to be called American Americans and be free at last. And rather than you movin’ forward progress, you dwelling in the past. We’ve struggled too long; we’ve come too far. Instead of focusing on who we were, let’s be proud of who we are. We are the only people whose name is always a trend. When is this shit gonna end? Look at all the different colors of our skin- Black is not our color. It’s our core. It’s what we been livin’ and fightin’ and dyin’ for. But if you choose to be called African American and that’s your preference Then I ‘ll give you that reference But I know on this issue I don’t stand alone on my own and if I do, then let me be me And I’d appreciate it if when you see me, you’d say, “there goes a man who says it loud I’m Black. I’m Black. I’m a Black American, and I’m proud Cause I love being an American. And I love being Black. I love being called Black. Yeah, I said it, and I don’t take it back." Smokey Robinson Def Poets, 3rd Season May 16, 2003 (c)

My Blog

Off work, pinapple and gin, shot of jack.

Hmm,Round goes my liferound again.Thanks GOD for it not being in the heavens,...yet.I love you, or whatever exisitance....you say you have, still aint won the lottery yet.Who fukkin careswell, I care....
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