~**Twisted**~

This is Pandora's Box...open with care.

**It's kinda dark and scary in here.**

**Friend or foe; you're an ambivalent catalyst and no matter what, I'll learn something - be careful what you teach me.
**I'll watch intently, I'll listen whole-heartedly...you'll swear I'm crazy, but I love who I am.
**Do not come to me with words or promise ~ prove it.
**Do not come to me with labels or stigma ~ you won't like me.
**I'll watch you lie ~ you're better off in silence.
**I'm not wild and I'm not bold; in fact, I'm reserved, shy and observant. I won't make a move until I'm certain it's safe to do so...I build sturdy walls; good luck. Some mistake it for being "stuck-up", but it's just not that way at all...when I open up, it's for real.
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**I do have a sweeter side...really; I just speak my mind.
**Very little shocks me...takes a lot to impress me.
**I'm not a neat freak, nor am I a health nut...but I can freak out over a "nut-job" in a healthy way.
**I am directionally challenged...I can prove it.
**I tend to make bad choices...my apologies in advance.
**I do not live beyond my means and I "means" just that.
**I am a smart-ass...I should wash my own mouth out with soap.
**I have a name...it's not what you're thinking.
**I write better than I speak...if the pen is mightier than the sword; this key board is hellfire.
**I will never argue with an idiot, it's pointless...but I will commend them for their bravery to provoke it.
**Conversations can end without notice...behave yourself!
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**I believe that our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.
**I believe that you're only as old as you feel!
**I believe that once it's over, it's over; time to walk away...and I do.
**I believe that where there's smoke, there's fire...just watch how fast I run.
**I believe that your enemy is your greatest analyst...they know your every fault and weakness.
**I believe in the "fight or flight" theory...the corner is not a good spot and tequila isn't a good idea either.
**I believe that there should be moderation to everything...extremists make it hard for the rest of us.
**I believe that everything works the way it needs to be...gotta suck it up!
**I believe that one should mean what they say and say what they mean.
**I do not commit to anything I'm not sure of.
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**I've learned that if there's a rule...it can be bent.
**I've learned that if it sounds too good to be true, the theories of probability do not apply.
**I've learned that there is a reason for that "little voice"...I don't stick around to see how it ends!
**I've learned that no matter how many times your heart gets broken, the world doesn't stop for your grief.
**I've learned how to turn the tables...fairly, of course.
**I've learned that "cheek-turning" gets you slapped twice...I'm not a sucker!
**I've learned self preservation...it sucked!
**I've learned how to fight back...I'm alive!
**I've learned the value of silence...I'm wiser!
**I've learned to be a grudger...and I so rule at it.
**I've learned that what I wanted and what I got were two different things.
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**Rubber-neckers piss me off....JUST DRIVE!
**I hate having to bite my tongue...it really hurts.
**If it's worth it, I'll find a way to get it...I don't always want what I can't have.
**I will never ask for anything that I can get for myself...if I can't get it on my own, I probably don't need it anyway.
**I am a very loyal person....IF you can get me that far. (Just keep'n it real)
**DON'T SAY "IT" IF YOU DON'T MEAN IT...I HATE THAT SHIT!
**Someone once said "If you're fake, go fuck yourself plaid"...I wonder what color he is now?
**I don't like to be held when I'm angry, but I'm not an angry person.
**If I'm smiling; be afraid....if I'm laughing; count your blessings.
**I am passive...I refrain from pressure or aggitation ensues.
**I love my piercings and my tattoo...yes, the tattoo hurt!
**I need a whole lot of space, but I take up very little room.
**I do not like chocolate and sea-food is a "mood thing".
**I am opinionated but not closed-minded.

*I'm not a prissy-assed-girly-girl; I am "woman"...there is a difference.
*Barbie got her hair cut and GI Joe kicked Ken's ass...my little sister was pissed!
*Coloring on the walls looked more artistic than coloring in books...my parents never understood that.
*I love baseball and the Yankees.
*Hockey games are better front row than they are on HD-ESPN.
*I'll camp and hike, pitch a tent and build a fire. Nature makes me happy...happiness is good.
*I don't like swimming anywhere that I can be classified as "lunch"....all boats require Dramamine (wooziness isn't pretty).
*I can hit a target with a .38 but I can't shoot a basket to save my life...it's pathetic, really.
*I am not afraid of snakes (R.I.P. Diamondra)...but I fear growing old.
*I can dress to go out, like a woman should...I still like my jeans and hiking boots.
*I've discovered that Palmetto bugs are actually Roaches on steroids, June bugs are little kamakazi bastards and them funky-look'n Love bugs are just plain disturbing!

Missin Whats Been Missin
© 2007 Scotty Green
She has colorful dreams
in black n white
that last way past the night.
Sister Christian
on a mission.
The quest for Mr. Right.
Making her way through the crowd
of freaks,
perverts,
bad cologne,
shiny fake watches
high heels n short skirts.
The Holy sinners
flirting
with the new converts.
She’s tired of making love
only where it hurts.
N its kinda sad.
N its pretty bad
that so far
an hour
in the hot shower
was the best she’s ever had.
Another days end.
Put the kids to bed.
With some chocolate
by herself
the last hour she’ll spend.
Maybe check her myspace
n the latest poem Scotty penned.
Thinking “Scotty might be an interesting friend
but the jerk acts to busy
to respond to the emails I send.”
One last sip of wine
with a soft slow purr.
Thinking “damn I’d be such a great opportunity
if love was more of an entrepreneur.”
Wondering if the something
that’s been missing
is the someone
that’s been missing her.

I like to laugh...who doesn't?
I like to snuggle...it's kinda cute.
Too complicated?, count me out!
I like to sleep in late on weekends....the alarm gets clocked.
I love to learn new things...or put a spin on old ones.
I like to make friends...I'm slow about it, but I get there.
I like to travel and wish that I could do more of it.
I like peaceful environments....my thoughts amaze me, but probably scare others.
I love privacy and shear intimacy.
I love to kiss....and I mean that sincerely.
I like movies...except scary / mushy ones.
COFFEE AND I HAVE A PLATONIC RELATIONSHIP!...I can suck a pot down by 10:00am.
I like to read current events, non-fiction and funny profiles...I'm easily amused.
I like frozen yogurt...but not ice cream.
I LOVE PEACHES!
I like calm....chaos unnerves me.
I like the ocean...I hear it's rage!
I like openness...talking is good; closed spaces aren't.
I love camping...keep the S'mores to ya-self!
My home is estrogen hell!...meds may be required.
I LOVE MY KIDS; they get plenty of growing room until I have to yank their chains...but they do think I'm a "cool mom" and that's awesome to me!
Lastly, 'Jose' is no longer a friend of mine...Patron' is, so there!
A Man in my Eyes
He can wear a ball cap backwards and turn me inside out.
He can appear to me and make my heart skip a beat.
His kiss can buckle my knees.
His whispers can make me gasp.
He can make me laugh.
He has boyishly good looks.
He is shy and reserved.
He has gentle hands.
He is doting and undaunted.
He has a strong intellect.
He is independent and strong
He is faithful and unwavering
He likes to keep abreast of what's happening in the world.
He is very interested in knowing and learning about certain things.
He likes to keep a healthy balance between "using his head" and "using his heart."
He is always a generous and supportive friend.
He always tries his best to avoid being irritable, even when he isn't feeling his best.
He almost always manages to be open-minded and flexible.
He generally takes the time to stay in touch and maintain friendships.
Family ties are important to him.
Sharing parenting values and ideas is important to him.
He doesn't have wildly radical views about society or morality.
He believes in being conservative about some things.
...It doesn't hurt to dream a little...
I shop like I drive; as fast as I can without getting snagged...I love driving but loathe shopping.
If it's got a stick, I'll shift it and be gone, BUT I never drive faster than I can think (yes...I can think faster than 5 mph)...did I mention that rubber-neckers piss me off?
Everything else is slow, meditated (not medicated) and methodical.
My car is older but it will move and I love it, my truck will haul a lot and I love that too.
When my car grows up, she wants to be a Mustang--I'm so proud of her!
My biological clock isn't ticking anymore!...Thank gods, I didn't think the damned thing would ever stop.
My bio-rhythm couldn't keep up either.
Thought: Why do we want what we can't have and why do we have what we don't want?

*T.T.F.N. does NOT stand for "Tit Touching For Neurotics"...Tigger would be mortified!
*"LOL" is over used and I'm just as guilty.
*"LMAO" should make us all feel at least ten pounds lighter and ten times happier.
*"ROTFLMAO" could cause an epidemic of E.R. visits.
*WRITING IN ALL CAPITAL LETTERS is considered rude...it just plain makes my eyes hurt.
*The "information highway" is grid-lock just waiting to happen...
*My neighbor calls her brother "dot-com" because he knows so much...he didn't know enough to stay off the bull he was riding.
*Yahoo.com should make an icon with a pierced tongue sticking out.
*Why is SPAM ending up on my Bulletin Board?...I didn't eat it as a kid and I don't want any now.
*BTW, WTF do we do if we can't abbreviate?
*POP-UP's used to be in book form.
*Cutting and Pasting have changed since kindergarten; WE CAN'T EAT THE PASTE!...but we can have pretty "wallpaper" on our "desktops".
*"Ctrl P" is not a statement of withholding a bodily function and "Ctrl X" is not a parental setting on the cable remote.
*Ctrl+Alt+Delete does not work in real life situations!...this is what counceling is for.
*Alt+Enter is not considered the back door.
*NETWORKING: A really sweet deal without the messy bed.
*WEB CAM: A really fucked up way to believe only half of what you see.
I work in a 3x8 cell without bars.
My title is "baby-sitter". I have TWO bosses now--bummer....you should see what happens when they're not looking.
Yeah, life sucks, but it must not suck that bad - mass suicides haven't plagued the nation.....yet. (Oops, that was sick, sorry.)
THEORY ON LIFE AND DEATH:
Life: Perpetual Reality comin at'cha fast....You'd better duck!
Death: Perpetual Reality comin at'cha fast...You didn't duck!!
How Rare Is Your Personality?
http://www.blogthings.com/howrareisyourpersonality...

Is your personality one of a kind or quite common? Find out how unique your personality is!

How Rare Is Your Personality?
http://www.blogthings.com/howrareisyourpersonality...

Is your personality one of a kind or quite common? Find out how unique your personality is!

I'm a watcher, a thinker and don't piss me off.