From our new friend Ron, written for MEAN STREET magazine's january issue:
"And the 2006 Punkette Diva Fit Award goes to: …toothsome Sari Swiggins of Santa Monica noize-wave bratz Lactate Intolerant at the year-ending show at Zamakibo! last month. The downtown clubhouse/party spot is sufficiently aboveground to rate occasional listing in the WEEKLY, but D.I.Y. enough for old-skool Playskool. La Swiggins, devastating in red mini and white go-go boots, whined bored complaint as band unwound a series of tight deconstructions of venerable punk riffs going back to The Chocolate Watchband. Suddenly, the bassist yelled “You skipped three songs on the setlist, retard!†and the show slid into a long shambolic breakdown. Amid squealing and giggles, the ladies cheerfully tore into each other, with the male drummer regarding the heaped girlies on the floor at the finale with “This SUCKS!†www.myspace.com/zamakibo, www.myspace.com/lactateintolerant. "New photos from 12/9 at zamakibo!one day a long long time ago in 2003 in a land far far away long before Lactate Intolerant was Lactate Intolerant sari and honey wanted to start a band. they tried with a couple of people and each time it didnt work out...THEN it kind of did...the line up was honey on bass, sari on guitar and their good duck Holly on drums...they decided that sari was no guitar player...she wasnt a player at all , so she should just be the singer. so then they were off on a dangerous journey to find a guitar player they searched over the mountains and through the woods and into the sea...when they came across a creature in a basket outside of a laundromat on pico and fairfax, the creature was called sarah laundry...she came to band practice one day and that was the day that Naked People was born...the first song...oooooooooooooooooooooh. So a big long drama happened and no one remembers why but they were missing a drummer and missing a band name and they had a deadline to record themselves for a battle of the bands at their school. So one day Honey, sarah and sari were trying to think of what to do about this so they sat on a couch and sarah drank some milk out of a scotch glass...and THAT was the day they thought of the greatest band name to ever be heard by ears...LACTATE INTOLERANT.
so they had a name,...they needed a drummer. Their buddy ashton played every instrument known to man kind so they asked him if he would help them out. and they recorded their little demo with him and the rest was history!!!! (and they didnt get into battle of the bands)
after that, things were pretty good. they were getting more famous then the most famous person you could think of, sexyer then michael pitt, and richer then donald trump!
they built fortesses and casinos and slayed dragons and creatures of the deep sea for the u.s. government. then in the summer of 2005 some problems came about, though they tried to work through them, it was not possible and on halloween, Ashton decided to move on from his non-lactating duities and pursue other dreams like, Indolent-ing, Rabies-ing and figureskat-ing.
It was now 3 three girls of the lactation alone, wich couldnt work cuz none of them played drums, so they turned to there good friend Richie Slick, lead singer of the diffs! and they popped the queston and he said "I Do" so he gave up his life as he knew it and joined the group of few who were intolerant of lactating and they lived happily ever after
I edited my profile with Thomas Myspace Editor V3.6 !
