BranDon profile picture

BranDon

Above the Storm...

About Me

I'm Brandon. I'm a skinny black dude from all over. I wuz born on April 15th, 1980, 11:47a.m. I have 4 sisters: Tami- 30, Ke'ala- 21, Simone an' Jonee-19. I'm the only boy so i kinda understand how femalez work. I am a stand-up comedian, it relieves my stress!! I'm a big kid. I gotta lot of little cuzinz that look up to me whom I live for!! I have two nephewz an' a niece that are silly az fuck! I have a really big family, whom all are quite funny. My mama iz my homie! She funny az hell! We don't have a generation gap, we klown alot, when she ain't hook'd on Sci-fi network. I wuz raised by my family and friends of theirs. I wuz 2 months pre-mature cuz it wuz stuffy in the womb. I am a photographer az well, I love takin' picturez! I would like to change the way the world viewz black american males. I'm not a pimp,thug,hustler,gangster,player, I don't sell dope, I ain't got no hoez or bitches, I don't listen to radio rap music, nor crunk. I have a HUGE respect for the founding forefatherz of the Hiphop culture. I believe most of rap now haz seriously took a fat shit on Hiphop. A lot of 2 Pac cookie cut-outz. Over all, I'm jus' good people. My sense of humor iz highly contagious, hope u catch it!!!!
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My Interests

I'm a kid @ heart!!!Winner of the 2004 Comedy Survivor @ the Funnybone in Newport, Ky. I've performed with Tommy Davidson ( In Living Color ), Sommore ( Queens of Comedy ) Ralphie Maye ( Last Comic Standing ),Mark Curry ( Hangin' with Mr. Cooper ) and Bruce Bruce ( The Wash, BET's Comicview ) Making people laugh!!!!! Doin' photography. cookin', cuz I got chef skealz!!! Meetin' people az vivid an' animated az myself. Stickin' up 4 the underdogz! Karaoke ( i do a good cover of "people are strange" by The Doors).I love it when people beat the oddz, like when kidz with disabilities develope a super gift or talent, shit like that proves God exsist!!! I think itz funny how I'm a big flirt, but get butterfliez around gurlz I REALLY like. I don't know y though? Theze are two paintingz by Justin Bua. Your results:
You are Spider-Man

Spider-Man 70%
Superman 60%
Hulk 60%
Green Lantern 60%
Robin 50%
Catwoman 50%
Batman 50%
The Flash 40%
Wonder Woman 30%
Iron Man 30%
Supergirl 20% You are intelligent, witty,
a bit geeky and have great
power and responsibility.
Click here to take the Superhero Personality Test

I'd like to meet:

Richard Pryor ( R.I.P. ), Paul Mooney( the truth ), KRS-ONE ( the teacha ), Outkast ( cuz I'm one 2. )Tyra Johnson ( Banks! ) , Ice Cube ( We gonna shake da globe. ), Public Enemy, Milla Jovovich!! Slim Shady ( My lyrical counter part, you'll see... ), Snoop ( again ) ,Ozzy ( hope u like my voice! ) , Digital Underground!!! ( They don't give yaw propz like they should, I'mma pick up where Pac left off. ), George Clinton ( I had Goldstar Chili with him! ), George Carlin ( teacher ),Above the Law ( yaw know who yaw are, the real westcoast G'z still flawsin' on hunit spokes! ) Bootsy Collins ( again ), 2 Pac'z mother, Sexy ass Sarah Silverman!!! President Dush ( i jus wanna talk. ) " Jay " from Jay & Silent Bob ( dat white boy remind me of me in a way) ,John Kerry ( Why the long face bro? yaw know he gotta long ass skinny head. lol ), Homer Simpson. ( and er' body with a pure heart. )

Movies:

Pootie Tang ( my shit ), Friday,Life( alwaze funny ),Which way iz up?,Volcano High, Iron Monkey, Coming 2 America, House Party 1 & 3 ( part 2 suck'd butt cheex ) Juice, Undercover Brother,The Mask , I'm gonna get u sucka!, Both Bill n Ted flix, 5th Element, 1st an' 2nd Blade moviez,Don't be a Menace...( my fav part iz when O.G.z mama come out on the porch tellin' him to clean hiz room up! thatz real shit. My cousin Vinny ( Marissa an' Joe Pesh'! )This iz an all-time classic! Sound track will never die!!! Tarna wuz a hotty! All the Freddy movies, Child'z Play ( the first one wuz creepy az fuck! ) Star Warz wuz bangin', Predator ( my favorite plot!! ) Matrix trilogy ( me an' mama went to see the first one )Aladdin, Findin' Nemo, Hollywood Shuffle ( alwaze funny ) MoonWalker ( Mike use to be kewl yaw! ) Disorderlies( Da Fat Boyz movie ) and much, much many fuckin' more. ( typin' this shit iz a buzz kill, I'm hungry. )Freddy Tribute... .. .... .. </obje

Television:

Hiphop iz my culture. Express yuh'self!!! .. I'm Juggernaut B-atch!!!! StarWarz Rap Battle .. .... ..

Books:

i jus' found theze bookz @ the downtown library in the childrenz section!!!

Heroes:

My family, friendz & deezzzzz muh-fuckuz!!! My big sis' Sommore!!! Love yuh much! Chris Titus iz a really good guy! Thanx for the pep talk! Mr. Tommy Davidson iz a HUGe inspiration!!!!Fuck Wendy'z bitch!!!!!!I got some cool story ideaz i think he'd like!

My Blog

poiNtLesS

MuLitpLe splurTz of thought patternzsplattero' so ViviDLy noooooooow...My SouLz shakin'makin'mefeeL mo' sHivery...yOOOOOOwwwWW!!!!i'm awakin' bythouCozmiK ChemistReeZI swob EnerGiezfrom evEry aspect o...
Posted by BranDon on Mon, 03 Dec 2007 02:44:00 PST

stix n stonez

..> stix n stonez... Body: hit trix with hot combzwhom fight gurlz with tight curlzover midgetz with tromboneznowdogz an' catz squabble 4 kibblez an' toy ratzwhile frogz post on logz an' shoot dic...
Posted by BranDon on Wed, 28 Mar 2007 07:41:00 PST

Last Knight

I had a dream that i wuz dreaming of the meaning of mybreathing.Lost in the labyrinth of my own mental pathz i feel atingaling i get erratic & nervous my spiritz spazz az the str8in'd road be...
Posted by BranDon on Thu, 01 Mar 2007 07:32:00 PST

The Healing

The human being is the most mightiest of all creatures in the universe. This is not to be taken egotistically as most ignorant persons do and justify the senseless killing of life, because everything ...
Posted by BranDon on Sun, 28 May 2006 09:47:00 PST

Where iz God?

When you ask the question, "Where is God?" all sorts of opinions and answers start coming from, in most cases, the most ignorant of religious leaders.They begin pointing to the sky, pointing to the ch...
Posted by BranDon on Sun, 28 May 2006 06:24:00 PST

9 Elementz of Hiphop

The Refinitions (or redefined definitions) are the Temple of Hiphops collection of Hip Hop cultural terms and codes designed to protect, preserve and establish Hip Hops common Spirit and raise the sel...
Posted by BranDon on Sun, 21 May 2006 11:37:00 PST

My first interview!!!

BRANDON JOHNSON Age: 26Neighborhood: Clifton HeightsYears in comedy: 8Web site: www.myspace.com/kookywunComedy credentials: Has opened for/performed with Bruce Bruce, Tommy Davidson, Sommore, Mark Cu...
Posted by BranDon on Sat, 29 Apr 2006 02:45:00 PST

Matrix az a metaphor

"In the beginning of his human life man was embryonic in the world of the matrix." "Before his first or physical birth man was in the world of the matrix. He had no kn...
Posted by BranDon on Sun, 23 Apr 2006 12:38:00 PST

Lion of the Tribe of Judah

The Lion From The Tribe Of Judah From the Shadows into the Light "And one of the elders saith unto me, Weep not; behold, the Lion of the tribe of Judah, the Root of David, hath prevailed to open th...
Posted by BranDon on Sun, 23 Apr 2006 12:20:00 PST