Turd Furgeson profile picture

Turd Furgeson

Donald Sutherland's breasts smell like peat moss. I know from experience.

About Me

My name is Josh, as I'm sure you know by now. As I'm writing this I am preparing to leave for basic training in Fort Leanord Wood. Or as my recruiters call it ( the pussies boot camp ) I'm going medical, give me a break. Other than running and doing lots of pushups, even though I have to, I hate doing situps. I was working two full time jobs before enlisting. It felt wonderful to tell both of them to shove it. So for the next few days I'm unemployed and loving it. Let's see...some things about me. Lately I have been really boring, just working and sleeping and drinking beer, but before I loved to go to clubs, especially bars that had live bands. I love going to concerts, my latest was Tom Petty with the Black Crowes opening up. That was probably the best concert I've ever been to. Also, trying to imitate Chris Robinson's Mick Jagger like dancing is just about the funnest thing to do drunk, however for some reason the police don't like to be asked to judge and see who does the best one. Anyway, I'm goofy for now, until my drill sergeant beats it out of me, and my one greatest ambition in life is to appreciate all that we take for granted, I'm still working on it.......!update! I'm finally done with basic. The drill sergeants beat the goofy out of me. Someone asked me the other day what I did with the old Josh. I told them I kicked his ass and stole his lunch money. I still don't appreciate everything we take for granted. Hmmm, what else? I finally realized that shooting things is fun.
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My Interests

Like I said before, running, jumping, acting crazy is something I think everyone should do. The more you let your inner child out, the more you realize just how bad of an idea having them is. Other than that, I love poetry, and books, and music. I'm also addicted to anything educational. I watched a two hour special on PBS about common household items of the 1800's. I loved every second of it, so don't judge me!

I'd like to meet:

I would love to meet the Dalai Lama. His words of inspiration have given me so much to think about, and so many answers to questions that I am too shy to ask CHECK THIS VIDEO OUT!!!

Music:

I love everything from jazz to death metal. On my IPOD ( I know I'm a sellout ) I have everything from old mississippi blues to new heavy metal to country, and I even have a celine dion song on there too.

Movies:

Again, they vary so much. I love watching stupid horror flicks just for fun, but I prefer to watch more intelligent movies like Hotel Rwanda ( I'm not afraid to admit that I cried, especially on the extras ) and I love foreign films, especially dry british comedies and dramas. Or like Billy Elliott, which is both.
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Television:

.. width="425" height="350" ..Get This Video And More @ FreeCodeSource.com

Books:

Again anything from the dalai Lama, also I love Anne Rice, Laurel Hamilton, and than the regulars that everybody loves...you know who I'm talking about.

Heroes:

Dalai Lama for one, his wisdom and insight are above and beyond that of any normal person. My friends, they inspire me everyday to be the best and most compassionate person I can be ( it just doesn't always workout that way) My grandfather, he has shown me what a real man should be like, and he is the kind of person that you should emulate. And least not, the great soldiers who are risking life and limb everday so that people, who they otherwise would have never even thought of, can have at least a few of the freedoms that we have in America.

My Blog

Haiku

A haiku is a for of Japanese poetry consisting of three sentences containing the combination of a 5 syllable, 7 syllable, and 5 syllable paragraph. I find these to be very uplifting and full of w...
Posted by Turd Furgeson on Thu, 03 May 2007 12:56:00 PST

What the hell?

For some reason, since I haven't been able to actually speak to anyone, everyone has been calling me. I just don't have the voice to do it right now. But I think that maybe I send out supersonic signa...
Posted by Turd Furgeson on Mon, 02 Apr 2007 06:53:00 PST

WooHoo! Surgery!

So, as you could probably tell by the name of this blog I had my tonsils removed today. I honestly don't know how it went, as I was unconscious the whole time. This was my first time being put under f...
Posted by Turd Furgeson on Thu, 29 Mar 2007 05:16:00 PST

Drool

I woke up this morning startled and really frightened. I felt like someone was pouring really slimey water all over my face. So I sat up quick as a whip and looked around to find the culprate. Except ...
Posted by Turd Furgeson on Mon, 15 Jan 2007 09:08:00 PST

Hmmm

    I guess that I'm supposed to write a blog, not saying who's requesting it *coughsaracough* But, I don't know what to write about, oh I just got an idea. I was doing ammo detail toda...
Posted by Turd Furgeson on Thu, 26 Oct 2006 02:57:00 PST

A what?

    So, I was at the grocery store buying kosher hot dogs for our company BBQ. Nothing too exciting, just a grab and go, in 'n' out kind of thing. Everything was going my way, I found t...
Posted by Turd Furgeson on Mon, 21 Aug 2006 06:55:00 PST

SNAKES ON A PLANE

    How did these motherfuckin snakes get on this motherfuckin plane?! Let me tell you, it's not about how they got on, it's about how they get off. I'm not gonna tell you. You have to ...
Posted by Turd Furgeson on Mon, 21 Aug 2006 05:11:00 PST

Who the hell reads this shit

    So, I went to the library and decided on checking out some books, mostly cause I get bored when I take a shit. I was just wandering around when I saw that they had one of my favorit...
Posted by Turd Furgeson on Sat, 24 Jun 2006 12:06:00 PST

Morale questions

So, me and J already had this comversation, but I would like other peoples feedback as well. Christianity says that masturbation is "self-abuse". Now, when I think of abuse I don't think of anything r...
Posted by Turd Furgeson on Sun, 21 May 2006 11:20:00 PST

yeah fort hood

So, I've been in fort hood for about two weeks now, and I'm pretty sure that I've done just about everything there is to do here as far as entertainment goes. Right now I'm waiting for that great...
Posted by Turd Furgeson on Sun, 21 May 2006 11:06:00 PST