Computers, music, art, japanese anime, video games, poetry
What does your birth month reveal about you?
March
Attractive personality.sexy. Affectionate.Shy and reserved. Secretive. Naturally honest, generous and sympathetic. Loves peace and serenity. Sensitive to others. Loves to serve others. Easily angered. Trustworthy. Appreciative and returns kindness. Observant and assesses others. Revengeful. Loves to dream and fantasize. Loves traveling. Loves attention. Hasty decisions in choosing partners. Loves home decors. Musically talented.Loves special things. Moody.
Take The Quiz Now! Quizzes by myYearbook.com
I'd like to meet:
God, The Undertaker, Jessica Alba, Tom Cruise, 50 Cent, Linkin Park and a few other ppl that i don't feel like naming right now.
to be hated and judged because of who you look like, to be alone in the world with no one to help guide you, to be afraid and not have comfort, to be in such a cruel world where it seems as though no one cares, through it all you've got to keep your head up and stay strong and fast, somewhere in this life is happiness, you've just got to fight hard for it.
Get your own countdown at BlingyBlob.com
Music:
TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: Nivek Timmons aka Sirus
Birthday: March 16, 1988
Birthplace: Staten Island NY
Current Location: Staten Island NY
Eye Color: brown
Hair Color: black
Height: 5'8
Right Handed or Left Handed: right
Your Heritage: african american
The Shoes You Wore Today: filas
Your Weakness: hmmm??? do you think that i have any?
Your Fears: lost em...
Your Perfect Pizza: supreme
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: don't really know, whatever happens happens
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: lol
Thoughts First Waking Up: what am i going to do 2day
Your Best Physical Feature: lips.
Your Bedtime: don't have one.
Your Most Missed Memory: moms
Pepsi or Coke: pepsi
MacDonalds or Burger King: doesn't matter. it's food
Single or Group Dates: both
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Nestea
Chocolate or Vanilla: Vanilla
Cappuccino or Coffee: neither
Do you Smoke: ???? what do you think?
Do you Swear: everynow and then
Do you Sing: yeah sometimes
Do you Shower Daily: of course that's a definite
Have you Been in Love: yes
Do you want to go to College: yes
Do you want to get Married: yes
Do you belive in yourself: yes
Do you get Motion Sickness: no, when i'm drunk everynow and then, lol
Do you think you are Attractive: yes
Are you a Health Freak: no
Do you get along with your Parents: well???
Do you like Thunderstorms: yes
Do you play an Instrument: no
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: yes
In the past month have you Smoked: ????
In the past month have you been on Drugs: ????
In the past month have you gone on a Date: no
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: yes
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: yes
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: no
In the past month have you been on Stage: no
In the past month have you been Dumped: no
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: well...
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: no
Ever been Drunk: yes
Ever been called a Tease: yes
Ever been Beaten up: no
Ever Shoplifted: no
How do you want to Die: hmmm, doesn't really matter. i'll go someday
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: that's a hard question
What country would you most like to Visit: Germany
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: don't matter
Favourite Hair Color: don't matter
Short or Long Hair: don't matter
Height: don't matter
Weight: don't matter, just not to big or to small
Best Clothing Style: don't matter
Number of Drugs I have taken: ????
Number of CDs I own: to many.
Number of Piercings: 2
Number of Tattoos: 0
Number of things in my Past I Regret: don't know how many
CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!2Pac, Linkin Park, Three days Grace, Crossfade, Breaking Benjamin, Slip Knot, Evanescence, Seether, Distured, Drowning Pool, Godsmack, Staind, Korn, 50 cent, G-Unit, Busta Rhymes, Papoose, DMX(back when he was still hard), Styles P, Young jeezy, TI, Rick Ross, Young Joc, Young Dro, Lil Wayne, The Game, Young Yola, Chamillionare, Ciara, Mary J. Blige
Movies:
What ifWhat if this never had a beginning
Therefore there would be no need for an ending
What if I swallowed my pride
And left my pain behindWhat if things began to change
Would I even care that nothing remained the same
Who would I have to blame
If everything ended up down the drainWhat if I left my past behind
And quit hitting rewind
Then could I leave you with this rhyme
And finish on this line I am…
I am a person without a cause
Nothing left to be lost
I am a man who is confused
Wondering what’s next to doI am a person who is fueled by the fire
All I need to do is fulfill my desires
I am a person with so many needs
That has yet to be pleasedI am a god in my own mind
My story is almost out of time
Before I drop the dime
I think that I will leave you with this rhyme Different Paths
So many different paths to choose
There’s nothing here for me, what do I have to lose
There’s nothing left for me to do here
Only shed more useless tearsI have one path that leads me back to my beginning =
A place that should have never had an ending
A place for me to heal inside
And forget about what I left behindThen there’s a path that I have never traveled before
One that will open new mysteries behind close doors
What it might have in store I do not know
But I’m still curious to see what’s hidden behind this doorThen I could stay here and try to make things right
Try new things and change my life
When I think about it here’s not really so bad
It’s just the shit that goes down makes me really madWhich path I will take I don’t really know as of late
At this time I’m still wondering what is my place
What will I do with my life
And will I finally get things right What’s inside
What is it that makes me who I am
What is the reason to which I feel like I am already damned
What is it that makes me tick
Why is it that I’m sick of all this shitLet me start with what’s on the inside
18 years of unheard cries
Pain inside that refuses to fade away and die
Fears and cries that I cannot hideThere are so many markings on the wall
It seems as though I’ve been here once before
Staring through an empty doorway
Nothing to look forward toNothing else left to do
But wave goodbye to the past
What I have inside I hate
But it has kept me here to this date From the start
I took a look at my life
And now I realize that it’s not right
I look into my soul
But I’m staring into a deep black wholeI have a lot of love and hatred in my heart
I am tormented and haunted by these thoughts
Consumed by my insecurity and my faults
I remember all of this from the startI am tortured with so many different feelings
I am in need of some spiritual healing
I have lived and I have died
That is the reason why I hide what’s insideNo One Else Like You
There’s no one else like you
No one that I rather be close to
No one that I would rather spend time
No one else that I would truly missThere’s nothing I wouldn’t do
To be there for you
I’d be there when you were feeling blue
To help you get throughYou would never have to struggle
We would be there for each other
And love one another
To this day there should be no otherBeen Through
I’ve been through so much
So many different scrapes and cuts
At times I hated my guts
And wanted to leave behind my life in the dustI have shed so many tears
Over the past seventeen and a half years
I have sweated and I have bled
At times I had nothing to look forward to, but dreadI have become strong
I am naïve no longer
I wasted days of my life in the past
But I sweep those days away like broken glassUnforgiving
I will never forgive you for what you put me through
You and your crew left me there standing confused
I always got the feeling that I was being used
But now I’m sick and tired of being abusedI sat back and watched as you destroyed my life
Hoping that one day you would change and become my wife
I sat and watched as you bled me dry
And how I cried at home every nightI sat back as you lied to my face
Praying that someday I would be able to leave this place
Now there’s nothing here except waste
It’s to bad that my heart can’t be replacedThinking of youAs I sit here and stare at the sky
I wonder if you could ever be mine
If wanting you was a crime
Then I would gladly do the timeI think of you and how you are
As I wish towards the stars
I think of you and your smile
And how for you I would walk a thousand milesJust to see your face
My feelings for you could never be replaced
I feel you now and after this date
I wonder if me and you meeting was designed by fateUntil my time
My hate towards the world
That I keep locked behind a closed door
The rage that I keep locked inside
Wants to escape and commit and unspeakable crimeMy heart is corrupt
My hatred is beginning to erupt
My pain is my pleasure
These feelings no one could ever measureI have had this feeling for a very long time
I speak of it in this eternal rhyme
I have cried and I have asked God why
But these questions will remain a mystery to me until it is my timeWhat Goes around comes around
There`s always going to be someone there to put you down
Someone here to push you around
Someone who wants to see you in the ground
Someone who doesn`t want you aroundThere will always be people who don`t want you to succeed
Someone who wishes to see you blees
Somone who wishes death upon you
and cause harm to youAll these things people put against you
but don`t worry God stands with you
They may wish to see you in the ground and see you down
don`t worry what goes around comes back aroundIn my Heart
You were always the one i though of first
And now that your gone I feel the worst
you always tried to put on a smile
I did my best to help you when you were downIalways like to be around you
to touch your neck to make you tickle
I remember you eyes and how they glowed
the love that i had for you was different from othersYou were one of my greatest friends that i ever had
Now without you in my life i am truly mad
Last but not least i don`t know where you are,
but to let you know you will always be a part of my heartDarkness
The light in my heart has ceased to exist
it has been replaced by a darkness i`m sick of this shit
the constant ramblings about my fault
The constant war in my mind and the terrible thoughtsThe hate i feel is dying to escape
but the rage within me i keep locked away
where i am today i do not want to stay
but i find myself here anywayThe different thoughts they consume me
but if god were to look upon me he would see right through me
The darkness is what made me it`s who I am
but when the light shine upon me i am damed once againDesire
My desire to succeed is what drives me
I want to be the best no one should have to look behind me
I should be first in yours and everyone`s eye
because i strive to be the best no one can denyMy will is what took me this far
I refuse to turn back, nor shall i give in
My will is strong as it`s ever been
My life iswhat i choose it to bei choose my own path
if you stand in my way then you will feel my wrath
i refuse to be last
Irefuse only to be part of the pastYou
So beautiful and kind
you are a dime
your grace and beauty
is like no otherit`s to bad you have another lover
you have one of the greatest smiles
I`d walk a thousand miles
just to see your faceI wish that I never had to leave this place
It`s an honor to know you
I`m glad that I told you
If only i had the chance to hold youTomorrow
At night I watch you sleep
your pretty eyes are closed to me
I think of tomorrow
Holding you in my arms I will sheild you from sorrowThe life that you gave me
a brand of new
the love that you felt for me
I felt the same for youyour serenity and grace
makes me never want to leave this place
in my arms I`ll hold you
until tomorrowSorrow
The pain that i feel inside
for the people who passed and died
I want to cry
and take the pain that the people have insideI want to take their pain as my own
and help them to find a home
and take them from a broken dome
i wish that i could be of some help to themTo help mend their hearts and make ammends
I think of you everyday and constant struggles
and the troubles that you face in the future
through all this look to the sky, beacuse God still loves youJust Like You
I refuse to be like you
someone who doesn`t have a clue
a person who is full of anger
and someone who is nothing more than a dangerI refuse to be just like you
a person who is feeling blue
someone who has no regards to the rules
a person who has nothing to loseI refuse to be just like you
a liar without any fire
a person without any desire
I refuse just to be like youBroken Song
The love that i had for you is gone
it is replaced by a broken song
what there was between us i do not know
you didn`t love me back that`s what i was toldI lived to see you smile each and everyday
to see you happyeach and everyway
and to be around you and hold you
and to be there for you when no one else wouldBut what i hate most is that i was the one who made the mistake
I should have stopped myself before it was to late
but now i find myself writing this poem
sitting here in the dark all alonethe love that i had for you is gone
it is replaced by a broken song
i want to bury it in the past
and conceal myself behind a maskFree
I want to be as free as the wind
free to wander the earth
free to ponder the thoughts of life
to figure out what god considers rightI want to explore the world
and find myself
find out what i`m living for
and discover the endless possiblities of lifeto be as free as the wind
no one else to guide me
to fly in the sky the wind behind me
to be free nothing else beneath meLife
I was a child without purpose
I didn`t know what my life mattered
i experienced a lot of loss
and had a purpopse without a causeI was full of anger
and to much of a danger
I hated myself
and wonder why i had to live this like that i hatedI was torn between myself
right and wrong, wrong and right
i didn`t feel as though i was up for this fight
i remember trying to take my life one nightwith that huge silver knife
i remember how the blade felt against my skin
and the feeling of the sensation again and again
the thoughts running through my headthe tears i have shed
and the blood i have bled
i remember that night as clear as today
and the feeling of it will never go awayi remember drowning myself in pills
to take away this horrbile pain
i didn`t feel like playing this game of life
but i was not strong enough to take my own lifeCry
I remember being ridiculed and judged
feeling that i was unloved
i remember how you always put me down
i felt as though i had drownedyou scarred me for life with your selfish acts
and when you slapped me for saying something back
i remember the brutal beatings
and whythey heldso much meaningthe thought of going home use to scare me
all i wanted to do was leave, and be
i rememberfeeling as though i would die
i was glad when i finally criedSick of it AllI`m sick of the pain wrapped up inside
I want to scream away and pass and die
I have so many mysteries locked away inside
I stay here in the dark so that i can hideI sit here and think of the past
and wonder why i felt as though i was considered last
now i`m here staring at broken glass
and now i see some consequences for wearing a maskI can`t blame the world for all my suffering
I`m the one who gave them power over me
they look upon me and judge me not knowing my needs
they sit here and watch as i bleedi begin to wonder why i love the world and hate it the same
the hell, i`m he only one to blame
but now i`m sick of this game i no longer want to play
I wish the pain and misery would just go awayRhymes
I build you up
you tare me down
i watch you sleep
you hope i drownI carry you around
you slap me down
i hold you as you cry
you only want to see me diewhy i stay with you i don`t know
you say that your sick of me time after time
this poem is not just a bunch of lines
what i say comes from the heart, that`s why i`ve got these rhymesTrue Love
Like no other feeling
being with you i am willing
to give up bad waysand spend with you rest of my daysI look forward to seeing you everyday
you are special to me in everyway
with you here next to me i have nothing to fear
because you are the one that i hold deari take time out of my day just for you
so that i can be there the days your feeling blue
I`ll hold you close to my heart
we`ll never be apartI`d be there in your darkest hour
to care and look out for you
I`m glad that god blessed me
he sent me and angel like you to take care of meExtacy
this feeling of great pleasure
i would take any measure
to be close to you
me being the only one that youcalled boothis feeling like no other
the way i feel i can`t describe
this divine happiness that`s never ending
in this there would be no need for mendingthis fire and passion that i feel
has helped stregthen my will
it`s better than taking happy pill
being in your arms then i could dealStayI`d like to change the hands of time
start over, would someone hit rewind
breakdown and build a new design
start over and leave this all behindI sit here and watch as time fades away
and wonder how i got back to this day
why i decided to play
I don`t know the answers to these questions anywaythe feelings of doubt consume me
if god were to look he would see right through me
i`m breaking down and fading away
i no longer have a reason to stayNeed youLike the fire needs the air
I won`t burn unless you are there
I`ll be there, I`ll be near
you can leave behind all of your fearsyou wipe away all of your tears
you are the one that i will hold dear
I`ll be there to help you when you are down
I`ll do my best to be aroundwhen i`m coming through your town
I`ll be there to hold you down
I have no worries when you are near
I think god that you are here
Television:
What makes you attractive? by eurudite
Name:
Gender:
Age:
Your Eyes: 11%
Your Smile: 42%
Your Body: 95%
Your Wit: 61%
Your Charm: 97%
Your Personality: 93%
What first attracts them: You smile all the time!
Why they stay: You are loyal to a fault.
What pushes them away: You don't take an interest in what they like.
Books:
John Grisham collection, Harry Potter Collection, the good stuff, lol.
Heroes:
How you really say "I love you." by lenatheraven
Name
...believe in true love?
Your hands say With me, you'll never be lost.
Your eyes say I can't dream anyone more beautiful.
Your hugs say I promise I will try to keep you safe.
Your kisses say I almost can't believe you love me.
Your body says I just want to hold you.
Your heart says Ich liebe dich.
