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cactusma

NOMAD IN ONE PLACE... HOPEFULLY

About Me

i am a nomad but not by choice. grew up in taiwan and argentina, lived in shanghai, beijing, tokyo and the states. once upon a time i aspired to be a writer/ceramicist but gave up cuz i was a wimp. this time around i've graduated and become an interior designer..... have a dog named cactus and a vaio computer i dubbed first electronic love and constant companion..... seemingly loud and self assured but am actually an introvert..... curious about the human psyche in general and love to just sit in a cafe and observe people.... occasionally i've been told i am odd and weird. and i take that as a compliment. i come across as very polite and quiet at first but that's just cuz i am sizing you up and figuring you out.

My Interests

creating entropy (famous for making a mess), mucking with clay, black and white photography, blogging, coffee, coffee, coffee, great books and great movies, attending live shows, tickling and smelling cactus's paws & ears when she's sleeping, obsessively arranging & rearranging all the tchotckes in my room, flea marketing, old records and midnite walking...

I'd like to meet:

peeps i wanna meet: luis baragon, louis kahn, andy riley, yohji yamamoto, steven holl, zaha hadid, rick joy, walter gropius, maurice sendak, faulkner, vonnegut, my great grandfather on mom's side (poet), cristobal balenciaga, henri cartier-bresson, kilgore trout...have met: 3.07.07 met maya lin & paul auster in one day... maya in the morning and paul at night... angela davis (beautiful head of hair!!!) billie hsieh, john irving (broken finger), renzo piano, norman mailer (slightly sleazy), bill clinton (cold large hands), martin amis (w/a blonde clad in valentino hanging on his saville row bespoke suit), duane michels, muhammad ali...i like the vulnerable side, i.e. cactus when she rolls over and shows me her belly. adorable and innocent. so yes, someone who shows me his soft belly...morally upright but not a religious fanatic... does not give money but food to the homeless...someone who does not do one night stands...a manboy who sings in the shower (so i can laugh out loud outside)...someone who appreciates my cooking (i am a fantastic and gutsy chef) and loves to travel and explore WITH me... absolutely cannot mind the fact that i hate hiking (due to my insect phobia--i scream bloody murder when a moth/butterfly flies anywhere near me) and someone who loves the sound of waves crashing against each other as much as i do...who sees beyond what is skin deep and zeroes into the intensity beneath the surface of the calm.

Music:

tindersticks, prefab sprout, leonard cohen, the national, trashcan sinatras, tom waits, WHAM, cowboy junkies, doves, iron & wine, the shins, carmen (the opera), anything chopin (esp stuff composed while with george sand), calexico, yo la tengo, sufjan stevens, chet baker, adderley cannonball, nina simone, sarah vaughan and oh so many more...

Movies:

blade runner, dirty filthy love, SECRETARY!!! (SEXY!!!) red (anything by krysztof kieslowski), happiness, in the mood for love, the city of sadness (anything hou hsiao hsien makes!!!), say anything, the breakfast club, la dolce vita, butterfield 8 (i want a slip like the one liz taylor wore!!!), chinatown, 8 1/2 and anything artsy fartsy or extremely low brow...ie. boomerang, harold and kumar go to white castle, etc.

Television:

macgyver, air wolf, king of the hill, the west wing, the sopranos, seinfeld, doraimo, early 6 ft under, assorted pbs programs, etc.

Books:

current acquisition: w.s.merwin's migration... andy riley's bunny suicides... perennial favs: the sound and the fury (major major crush on quentin compson in my 20's, erudite & sensitive but his kind of indecisiveness leaves me cold and irritated in my 30's), master and margarita, the end of the affair, heart of the matter, kiss of a spider woman, slaughterhouse 5, god bless you, mr. rosewater...basically anything by faulkner, greene, vonnegut...

Heroes:

luis baragon, louis kahn, zaha hadid, billie hsieh, maya lin, my vet, whoever can fix my vaio...james joyce cuz he wrote ulysses when he had another attack of iritis... if he can do it, goddamnit, i can~

My Blog

that old role

dreamt last night that apple took me to his ex's apt....it was a small one bedroom, sparsely furnished without much thought... some exposed brick... in the living room, a great big clothes rack a...
Posted by cactusma on Fri, 19 Sep 2008 06:00:00 PST

the hope of swapping invincibility for the invisible line

What is the most important thing you've learned from a past relationship?   In my immortal 20's, I believe I was invincible, that love will conquer all& I see things in black and white, he either...
Posted by cactusma on Wed, 03 Sep 2008 10:25:00 PST

princess bashing, brain chemistry & diamond pendants

i feel like a complete loser lately. 1. i did not take the dc job... tony of course chopped it up to rotten apple... which is so not true... at the time i actually wanted to go to dc cuz i saw that h...
Posted by cactusma on Sat, 30 Aug 2008 12:34:00 PST

the art of walking away...aka dating again...

sometimes walking away is necessary. too often we neglect the importance of letting go...of knowing when to say basta. i did 18 months ago... recently, one night, he said you just want a rich and powe...
Posted by cactusma on Wed, 25 Jun 2008 11:05:00 PST

cemetery dreams and packing

aud came to visit. called up rotten apple and the three of us went to trinity cemetery/mausoleum on saturday... cemeteries tend to give me a strange kneaded mixed dough feeling--happy and sad... happy...
Posted by cactusma on Tue, 29 Apr 2008 09:01:00 PST

ten lessons learned....

1. be an expert in hospitality sheets/pillow cases/blankets/throws--what threadcounts and the laundry process of said items as to not order the wrong items...    2. be an expert in...
Posted by cactusma on Thu, 24 Apr 2008 11:34:00 PST

shakespeare, sheeps intestine and the orphan that is called taiwan

listening to yo yo ma’s bach... and whenever i do, i think of what benedick said in much ado about nothing: Is it not strange that sheep’s guts should hale souls out of men’s bodies?...
Posted by cactusma on Tue, 08 Apr 2008 07:28:00 PST

the unthinkable goodbyes

she can’t sleep... cuz she realized she has begun saying goodbye as she walks around the city... --to the pretty cornice every 9:12 am --waving hello to the metro booth guy (who gave her...
Posted by cactusma on Wed, 19 Mar 2008 03:18:00 PST

which brings me to you

rotten apple lectured... You keep looking for a man-boy.  A goofy dork.  Sweet, confused, in need of direction and help.  A puppy.  That’s what you want, but not what you nee...
Posted by cactusma on Mon, 17 Mar 2008 10:12:00 PST

sea of shrimps, creepy dubai and my new arch idol!

fairly uneventful weekend where i meandered to the asia society asian art fair benefit--for all the lamest reasons to the outside world but not to me...   1. i need to put my yohji evening d...
Posted by cactusma on Sun, 16 Mar 2008 09:22:00 PST