upside-down & inside-out, 'bout to show you fools what its all about. i'm an enigma wrapped in a mystery hidden in a ridddle and locked inside a box covered in sticky stuff that's kinda gross so you really don't wanna touch it anyway. i am a little bit of everything. i'm absolutely nothing. i am from a time that time has forgotten. mother earth and father time were both my illegitimate children. i'm the hottest shit on the streets. all the kids want one. the laws of physics do not apply to me. remember when you were little and you would lock yourself in the bathroom and take all the cleaning products under the sink and all the health and beauty aids from the medicine cabinet and mix 'em together in the toilet and call it an experiment? that's me. so's that run-on sentence you just read. want me to come visit you? just turn off all the lights and say my name three times as you stare into the mirror at midnight. i'll be there soon. i fucks wit jesus. i am eighteen feet tall and just as wide. i have similar markings to a clown fish. one time i ate a whole moose by myself......in one bite......while it was still alive......it's name was rufus. then i ate my own head. i wrote the laws of physics (sorry about the typos to all you scientific types). when people wonder what god looks like, they usually think of an image that looks nothing like me. my new nickname is satan. my old nickname is jafar. i never had the nickname nick. the wagon is red. it's salami time! 3.14159... i was the fifth Beatle (well, technically i was the first since i did start the band and all, but i'm the fifth most well-known out of the group, seein as how those snotty ass brit muthafukkers couldn't deal with the fact that my slide-whistle playin' put them all to fukkin shame!!!). my wife hates me. so does my wife's wife. i'm not gay, but my boyfriend is. bumper stickers are for retards (retards with cars, though, so at least they got that, huh?) but dump-her stickers are genius! edith, will ya stifle, eh? every time a bell rings, an angel asks me to borrow money. i like cheese when its all melty. unfortunately, that's precisely when it doesn't like me. if you've read this entire description, you will die in exactly one week. doodoo. whatever you think about me, you're prolly wrong, so whether you like me or hate me, it's time to rethink your position. my cats breath smells like cat food. suck a fat baby's dick.
want mixes? use these links or right click and choose "save link as" to download
"Timeless"
"Pound for Pound..."
"Subculture (side 1)"
"Subculture (side 2)"
