I am Professor Chaos, and now this puny world will bow down to me.
This one time, my mom wanted me to see what my dad was going to buy her for their anniversary. He went and saw a movie at the old Studcat Theater called "Fisting Firemen 9" [i never saw 1 through 8] then to the White Swallow Spa where he wrestled [and was pinned down by this one black guy for fifteen minutes!] and i took pictures of him for my mom and gave them to her. I followed him again the next day, and my dad told me to lie to my mom! "Sometimes telling a little white lie is ok. Like for instance when you catch your father jacking off in a gay men's bath house." My mom got really upset, yes she did, and we went for a drive, but when she got out of the car it fell in the river! I had to get home in time for the dinner at Bennigan's, and when i got home, both of my parents wanted me to lie, yessir! But instead, I made them tell the truth to the media, but now I think it's okay to lie a little bit to start... seeing as how my dad is gay and my mom tried to kill me and all.
I'd rather be a crying little pussy than a faggy goth kid.
I used to date this one girl, Lexus. She worked at this place called Raisins... She was so pretty. My parents were kinda mad at me.
Where I go, destruction will follow.
Another time, I was just playing with the guys, you know the guys... anyways, Proferror Chaos had come out of the shadows, and the guys... you know the guys... they were ninjas. And then... I got hit in the eye with a ninja star! It hurt so bad... and the fellas did not want to get in trouble with their mom and dads, so they put grass and dirt on my face and socks on my ears and made me look like a dog to take me to the vet. Only then the older kids showed up and started a fight with the guys, so I started walking on my own... But it is okay now... You can't even tell.
I can't whistle if I eat too many crackers.
My parents are going to be really mad.
