Verless Doran - ProfilesArchive

About Me

Hello everyone, My name is Verless and I live in East TN, right in the middle of Dolly Parton country. (In fact, my uncle gave her guitar lessons in middle school and she still owes him $5.00.) There aren't many people who write here, but there are a lot of 4X4's, Confederate flags, Meth labs, dog fights, cock fights, drunk drivers, corroded livers, barroom brawls, busted stalls, pregnant teens, prom queens, gun racks, possum sacks, pawn shops, tobbacco crops, 3 stickers, pot lickers, etc. etc. etc. Anyway, that is why I am hereThe most interesting thing about me is the fact that I spent the first 13 years of my life locked in my parents' attic due to an unfortunate disfigurement, which does not bear repeating. During that time, my imagination developed exponentially, as one might expect, and I began to scratch crude stories into the wall with bits of bone from the sundry scraps which were pushed under my door. Later, when I escaped with the help of a telepathic cockroach and a malignant dwarf, I began transcribing those stories to parchment. I now make my living by writing and brokering rare books. The brokerage of rare books, well, I don't know where that came from.

My Interests

Reading, music, art, origami,

I'd like to meet:

Someone who loves to quote poetry by candlelight. Someone who likes to slamdance in the rain. Someone who likes to read naked. Someone who likes to write naked. Someone who likes to operate power tools naked.
You May Be a Bit Borderline...
Your mood swings make a roller coaster look tame!
When you're up, you're a little bit crazy...
And when you're down, your whole world is crashing
Scary thing is, these moods can change by the minute! What Personality Disorder Are You?..

Music:

Tool, Dave Matthews Band, Patty Griffin, Tom Waits, Primus, Bad Brains, The Misfits, Ella Fitzgerald, Suicidal Tendancies, Iron Maiden, Miles Davis, R.L. Burnside, David Bowie, Bruce Springstein, Faith No More/Mr. Bungle, Voivod

Movies:

MST3K, Monty Python & the Holy Grail, TX Chainsaw Massacre, Magnolia, Lonesome Dove, Big Bad Love, Cube,..

Television:

MST3K, Seinfeld, MASH, Ren & Stimpy, Mythbusters, Discovery Channel, History Channel, Animaniacs

Books:

Joe by Larry Brown, Soldier's Pay by William Faulkner, The Woman in the Dunes by Kobo Abe, The Complete Stories of Saki, A Good Man is Hard to Find by Flannery O'Connor, The Shadow over Innsmouth by H.P. Lovecraft, The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger

Heroes:

William Faulkner, James Maynard Keenan, Alexander Solsenitzyn, Victor Hugo
You Are 48% Girly
You're a little girly, a little boyish, and probably a whole lot indie.
You have your own unique style, and it pretty much defies gender lines. How Girly Are You?
You Are 64% Weirdo
You're a pretty weird soul, and you often can't help but notice how strange you are.
You simply see things very differently. So you live your life in a very unusual way.
Who cares if you don't fit in? Just remember to embrace your inner weirdo... because there's no hiding it. Are You A Weirdo?
Your Mind is NC-17 Rated
You're mind is so filthy... you should should be washing every part of you out with soap.
If your thoughts can go dirty, they do. Almost everything is NC-17 to you! Do You Have a Dirty Mind?Your results:
You are Hulk Hulk 90% Green Lantern 90% Spider-Man 80% The Flash 80% Iron Man 80% Wonder Woman 75% Batman 65% Robin 65% Supergirl 60% Catwoman 55% Superman 50% You are a wanderer with
amazing strength.
Click here to take the "Which Superhero are you?" quiz...

My Blog

Old Water for New

Old Water for New In Cooperstown, an economically depressed community in North Dakota, plans to bring in a hog rendering plant and dairy were thwarted by local residents. Their reason? Fear tha...
Posted by Verless Doran on Tue, 04 Dec 2007 12:24:00 PST

Oh Christmas Tree (Why Do You Confuse Us So?)

Oh Christmas Tree So, I was watching the news yesterday morning, and they were talking about the fact that in the city of Philadelphia, atheists have won the right to display a Tree of Knowledg...
Posted by Verless Doran on Mon, 03 Dec 2007 02:43:00 PST

Spank You Massachusetts

Spank You Massachusetts In the state of Massachusetts, it is now illegal to spank your children. That's right. The same lawmakers that refuse to pass Jessica's Law have found a more ingenious w...
Posted by Verless Doran on Sun, 02 Dec 2007 10:01:00 PST

The Rage of an Impotent Man

NEW YORK Fake mug shots of President Bush, Vice President Cheney and other White House officials are on display at the main branch of the New York City Public Library, and the exhibit has caused qui...
Posted by Verless Doran on Fri, 30 Nov 2007 09:30:00 PST

There Once Was A Teddy Bear Named Muhammad

"Gibbons had one of her 7-year-old students bring in a teddy bear, then asked the class to name it and they chose the name Muhammad, a common name among Muslim men. Each student then took the teddy be...
Posted by Verless Doran on Fri, 30 Nov 2007 08:46:00 PST

Charlie

CHARLIE When I was a child there was an old man who came to me on holidays and birthdays, special days set aside for special things. And he came from far off places, mystical lands lik...
Posted by Verless Doran on Mon, 12 Nov 2007 03:34:00 PST

Thief in My Mouth

Intoxicate: [15th century. From medieval Latin intoxicat- , the past participle stem of intoxicare "to poison," from Latin toxicum "poison" I never really thought about it like that, not m...
Posted by Verless Doran on Sun, 11 Nov 2007 02:45:00 PST

A Beautiful Feast

Beautiful people never admit they are beautiful But ugly ones do so, and more Poring over every lowly attribute The grotesqueries and maladies of a careless god Are known to them like scriptures And t...
Posted by Verless Doran on Sat, 23 Jun 2007 10:56:00 PST

Poem

Rachel's Last Lamentation A thousand now, ten thousand more,Are sentenced, doomed to follow.A million soon shall cross that doorTo be pursued and swallowed.And eyes that once shed many tearsWat...
Posted by Verless Doran on Sat, 16 Jun 2007 10:27:00 PST