Jeff - ProfilesArchive

About Me

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I'm cute, funny, smart, sarcastic, evil, fun to be around, and usually the life of the party, if not a close second. I can probably cook better than your momma, play the piano like a devil, figure your income taxes *and* tell you what's wrong with your computer, and usually at the same time. My mind goes in several directions at one time, so if I don't remember who you are because you saw me at this bar or that place or what's-his-name's funeral six weeks ago, please don't be offended, I have a mental breakdown daily because I can't remember where I parked my fucking car. Say "hi" if you dare :)

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My Interests

Music (all kinds), drinking, cooking, drinking, reading, drinking, hanging out with friends, hanging out with friends that like to drink, staying in alone, drinking, bar-hopping, drinking, practical jokes, swimming, drinking, sailing/boating, scuba diving, (never drink whilst sailing or scuba diving, it's dangerous). Oh yes, and drinking.

I'd like to meet:

Tammy Wynette, but she's dead. Don't really care for George Jones that much, he's a drunk.

How to make a Jeff
Ingredients:
1 part success
3 parts arrogance
3 parts ego
Method:
Blend at a low speed for 30 seconds. Add a little caring if desired!
Username:

Personality cocktail
From Go-Quiz.com

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Movies:

Sordid Lives is my new fave. If you haven't seen it, rent it today and watch it. If you're too cheap to rent it, come watch it here :)

Television:

Family Guy, Will&Grace, 24, CNN (just to keep abreast of what's going on in the world)... did I just say breast? Gawd

Books:

Currently reading "Wicked" by Gregory Maguire (thanks, Ben!). Living History by Hillary wasn't bad, she rocks! "How To Keep A Man" by someone..... *shrug*

Heroes:

Olivia Newton-John.

My Blog

so.....

So, I have a 20 year class reunion in October, and need a hottie to accompany me to the festivities.... let me know if you're interested.... m'kay, thanks....J
Posted by Jeff on Tue, 29 Aug 2006 11:26:00 PST

My owie.

So I fell on my butt at work two weeks ago and fractured my left wrist. I have pictures of my cast on my picture pages. There's still room to sign it, so let me know.
Posted by Jeff on Sun, 02 Jul 2006 11:12:00 PST

And another thing...............

So, I got this catalog at work yesterday, advertising this years latest and greatest Christmas Card selections for businesses and homes, etc. At first I thought to myself, What in Christs n...
Posted by Jeff on Thu, 20 Oct 2005 11:41:00 PST

R.I.P. Dell

Well, after using the PC for almost 23 years (my first was the original IBM PC, green screen, clicky keyboard, ugh), I have finally "moved on" to bigger and better. Having almost won an Ebay bid for a...
Posted by Jeff on Sat, 20 Aug 2005 06:53:00 PST

today.

i think today can be summed up by a short poem by tim burton. it goes like this: There once was a girlwho was made up of junk.She looked really dirty,and she smelled like a skunk. She was always un...
Posted by Jeff on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

my cat

I tried for a whole summer to teach our cat to play the piano. We started with an easy song. It was 3 Blind Mice. My dad said it didn't work because the cat had a tin ear, but I think it was because s...
Posted by Jeff on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

Eh, figured as much

So I'm Sam from Benny & Joon.. go figure You Are Sam From "Benny & Joon."You are very talented at physical comedy. People are in awe of your abilities. However, you have many quirks which can eithe...
Posted by Jeff on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST