DREY.
Even the name screams, "Hey, is that a chick?"
Hi. I write substantial shit here sometimes, and by "substantial," I mean "nazi," and by "shit," I mean "propaganda."
I like long walks on the beach and making fun of those less fortunate than I am.
Leather and tight pants are awesome to me, but goddamnit do I hate pretentious pussy rock bands. Like U2. God, I hate them so much. I even made a page about how much I hate U2 but Tom, their numba 1 fan 4 eva, deleted it.
FACT: People only look cool when they're smoking cigarettes or hanging out next to me.
Cynics believe I'm an abomination to their demi-philosophy, but I always believed that the stegosaurus had more charisma than any self-proclaimed cynic.
I'm a living work of satire, NOW with just 2 grams of sodium and 5 hits of E.
My eyeballs have hallucinogenic properties; lick them and you'll see frogs.
If you play "Stairway to Heaven" backwards, you can hear a Satanic message. About me. Listen closely. What's worse, when you play it forward, it plays "Stairway to Heaven."
I shot John F. Kennedy.
Facts that are real, honest, true, and sometimes repetitive or redundant and oftentimes repeat themselves:
+ Discordian. A dirty mind is a terrible thing to waste.
+ I make money by pouring beer and liquor down people's throats.
+ My blood is music. Music heals all. Unless you got cancer.
+ I was born and raised in Guam. I moved to Peniscola, Florida on May 16, 2007.
+ Words like "chink," "fag," and "nigger" hilariate me, but I cringe every time someone uses the word "fuck" to connotate "sex." That's fucked up.
+ I am half white and half Korean. Therefore, I am a rice cracker. I coined this term. Don't believe otherwise.
+ My talents include pulling money out of my ass, mixing drinks, and making others want to hang themselves.
+ You know, it just keeps getting funnier and funnier each time someone decides to call me "Dr. Dre." That joke never ever gets old, and each time I'm referred to as a rapper, I almost piss my pants out of sheer hilarity.
