John profile picture

John

Canceled. Rescheduling.

About Me

So ugly I've broken all my mirrors.

My Interests

Saying the right thing at the wrong time.

I'd like to meet:

the press.

Music:

Nirvana, Hazel, Pixies, Daniel Johnston, the Dials, the Weakerthans, Joanna Newsom, Drive Like Jehu, Elliott Smith, Lifter Puller, the Thermals, Robert Johnson, Mudhoney, Braid, Leadbelly, Hot Snakes, Ape Ray, the Hold Steady, Lynx, Sweep the Leg Johnny, the Monkees, Gang of Four, Smoking Popes, Flaming Lips, Billy Bragg, the Breeders, My Bloody Valentine, the Wipers, Minor Threat, Sex Pistols, the Stooges, the Vaselines, the Wrens, Jawbreaker, J Church, Husker Du, Sonic Youth, Calamity Jane, the Decemberists, Dismemberment Plan, Flipper, You Am I, Velvet Underground, REM, Fugazi, Melvins, Scout Niblett, Sleater-Kinney, Ted Leo/Pharmacists

Movies:

Brewster McCloud, Over the Edge, This is Spinal Tap, Shawshank Redemption, Weekend At Bernie's, Death Race 2000, Royal Tennenbaums, Waiting for Guffman, American Movie, Almost Famous, Almost Heroes

Television:

The State, The (BBC) Office, Arrested Development, Late Night with Conan O'Brien, The Gong Show, Silk Stalkings

Books:

Webster's Dictionary, Roget's Thesaurus, Messinger's Hiding Out

Heroes:

Bobcat Goldthwait, Emo Phillips, Gilbert Godfried

My Blog

I was on the Tonight Show last night!

I didn't see it when it was on last night, and am astonished by how many of my friends actually watch the Tonight Show rather than Letterman. So when I heard a story of mine was highlighted in the "H...
Posted by John on Wed, 12 Sep 2007 07:12:00 PST

I'm a man obsessed.

I just got back from Austin, Tx. I was on vacation, so you can't say I had too much time on my hands, because that's the whole point of vacations. Anyway, without further adieu, here's me and Daniel...
Posted by John on Wed, 30 May 2007 04:05:00 PST

I'm the motherfucking princess.

This song cracked me up for so many reasons. I had to take a stab at it. Feel free to leave a comment telling me how stupid I am...Dark Yellow sings Avril Lavigne!...
Posted by John on Tue, 01 May 2007 03:02:00 PST

Murder! (allegedly)

I'm covering a death penalty trial for the paper. It's pretty gruesome.It didn't freak me out until I caught the alleged murderer staring at me during opening arguments. It was probably my fault. ...
Posted by John on Tue, 20 Mar 2007 09:27:00 PST

Diet!

Long time no blog. Check out my new diet! I'm gonna be SOOO skinny soon! And I'll probably start barking, but it'll be worth it.Hey New Yorkers! Good luck with this one! I don't personally walk aro...
Posted by John on Thu, 08 Feb 2007 04:58:00 PST

Look to the cookie.

Like a lot of people, Kramer was my favorite character on Seinfeld.By now I'm sure you've seen the film of Michael Richards going on a racist tirade against a black heckler during a stand-up performan...
Posted by John on Tue, 21 Nov 2006 07:34:00 PST

Stranger than Fiction

So I saw that Will Ferrell/Maggie Gyllenhaal/Dustin Hoffman movie Stranger than Fiction the other night. It was good. Check it out. It was filmed largely in Chicago.On July 8, 2005 I was walking tho...
Posted by John on Wed, 15 Nov 2006 08:15:00 PST

My biggest scoop yet! (About the Cook County GOP)

Yep-a-roo. I scooped even the big metro daily papers with this one! It's pretty crazy. And that's not even a pun.And the morning it was published, the Capitol Fax blog, which is THE blog for Illino...
Posted by John on Sun, 05 Nov 2006 02:38:00 PST

I've finally contributed to a winner!

I couldn't believe this when I read it. Kurt Cobain was the year's highest paid dead celebrity. I have no idea how, but the news made me happy nonetheless. The most recent Nirvana recording, the "Be...
Posted by John on Thu, 26 Oct 2006 08:27:00 PST

Birdman of Alcatraz

I asked my friend (and ex-girlfriend) Sara to make me a Myspace image. She's a pretty amazing artist, I think, and she actually finished something for me! So I uploaded it. Feel free to post your i...
Posted by John on Tue, 24 Oct 2006 07:23:00 PST