soadsamurai - ProfilesArchive

About Me

I am extremely sarcastic, kinda bitchy. I love to laugh. I love that Dane Cook, for he is a silly bitch. I also enjoy rigorous activities such as karate, drawing, video gaming, running in sand, changing light bulbs, and sleeping. Also I have an uncanny ability to take anything and relate it to Family Guy or Dane Cook or myself or Robin Williams or Scrubs.

My Interests

People, anime, video games, art, martial arts, and stand up comedy. If you are any of these, you interest me.

You Are 60% Weird
You're so weird, you think you're *totally* normal. Right?
But you wig out even the biggest of circus freaks! How Weird Are You?
Your Penis Name Is...
Squirmin' Herman the One-Eyed German Penis Name Generator

I'd like to meet:

People that will entertain me

Music:

Uhh...[insert genre here] I ain't picky.

Movies:

Doom...don't ask, Silent Hill, Memoirs of a Geisha, random Disney movies, old random Asian martial arts flicks. Robin Williams Live on Broadway. I can quote that shit word for word.

Television:

[adult swim], Seinfeld, Family Guy, Becker, Random cartoons, Comedy Central like South Park, Scrubs

Books:

Memoirs of a Geisha, Secret Life of Bees, 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea. Anything by Robin Cook

Heroes:

Bums. 'Cos they say, "F*@! money. I decide to live without the constraints of such capitalism," maybe less profound and with words less than two syllables, but nonetheless. My mom and dad.

My Blog

Barbie dollz & Bratz

Rant from Booter-FreakI just loved it, she said what I was thinking, so I stolz it.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~You know, I don't get it. How often do we see Barbie take crap? Go ahead, type i...
Posted by soadsamurai on Wed, 24 Oct 2007 06:01:00 PST

Fuk U Rap Muzic

So what's the deal with new rap?New rap slash hip-hop likes to dismantle amazing oldies. Tainted Love, masacred. Message In A Bottle gutted, filleted, then grilled to a crispy nothingness ...
Posted by soadsamurai on Mon, 16 Jul 2007 09:40:00 PST

It's long, but worth the read

No matter how much honesty hurts, I take it to heart. If there is one thing that I appreciate the most in the world is when a friend rips into me, tells me everything wrong with me, and pisses them o...
Posted by soadsamurai on Thu, 03 May 2007 11:47:00 PST

Cell phones + women + driving = retardation

YAY for downtown Eugene. I was riding my bike on the sidewalk, some areas of DT Eugene don't have bike lanes, and some asshole pulled out of an alley way without looking. I slammed on my breaks and ...
Posted by soadsamurai on Sat, 28 Apr 2007 05:53:00 PST

If I Could Travel Back in Time

If I could travel back in time I would go to the late 17th century in little ol' Salem and I would be sure to tell them the errs of their ways. Actually, I would show them the errs of their ways...
Posted by soadsamurai on Wed, 25 Apr 2007 11:19:00 PST

Random Clam

Help me escape this prison cell It's like I've died and went to hell I cannot live for much longer My deterioration's getting stronger My mind wonders and becomes weaker Day by day my future's me...
Posted by soadsamurai on Tue, 24 Apr 2007 12:49:00 PST

ANAL SEX

South Park Episode "Canceled" Boys, this is what it is like when girls have anal sex. And I believe if you want to have anal sex with a girl, she should be able to put on a strap on an...
Posted by soadsamurai on Wed, 18 Apr 2007 10:55:00 PST

Old men seeking young hot chick

Seriously. What could a young and generally good looking woman want with a 30+ shriveling old dood? What makes you think I would be interested in you? "I have a heart of gold and experience of an old...
Posted by soadsamurai on Thu, 22 Mar 2007 04:56:00 PST

love vs diarrhea

I've just convinced myself that I am not in love [or intense feeling of emotion toward another...not so far as love perhaps]. This feeling of butterflies in my stomach is the acid churning, fixi...
Posted by soadsamurai on Sun, 11 Mar 2007 03:31:00 PST

Hunger

My mind is empty, I have no feeling, I have no emotion. My head is empty, I have no senses, I have no thought. My stomach is empty, I have no food, I have no food& I'm hungry! My ...
Posted by soadsamurai on Sun, 11 Mar 2007 03:30:00 PST