Jamie profile picture

Jamie

I am here for Friends and Networking

About Me

I'm a writer, performer, plantsmen and a few other things. I feel terribly insecure unless I'm holding a book in my hand. I'm currently teaching ESL and trying to get back into university. I always enjoy good company, I like cooking for good company even more. I drink Jäger' Bombs on Fridays and Shiraz on Saturdays. It's caffeine in liquid form otherwise; combining these two is best.

My Interests

Pretending to be cool and hip and urban while I'm living in my parents basement in the suburbs, poetry, music, partying, going to shows, especially poetry shows, because poets are sexxy, hosting, performing, cooking, reading, writing, travel, vandalizing expensive cars...

I'd like to meet:

That guy who works the crane. What's it like up there in the sky?

Music:

Death From Above, The Stooges, The Yard Birds, The Ya Ya Ya's, The Dandy Warhols, NY Dolls, The Ramones, The Kinks, CSS, The Who, Stiff Little Fingers, Ladytron, Joy Division, Black Rebel Motorcycle Club, The Who and anything pretty much

Movies:

The Science of Sleep, Big Fish, Edward Scissor Hands, Kung Fu Hustle, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Adaptation, Being John Malcavich, and, of course, Conan the Barbarian

Television:

I'll be straight to the point and say all TV sucks, even though I watch it everyday for some ungodly reason. Ok, maybe the new Dr. Who and Kenny vs. Spenny, but that's pretty much it. And maybe What Not to Wear. That's it.

Books:

Frank Herbert, Kurt Vonnegut, Bukowski, Al Purdy, Ivan E. Coyote, Pablo Neruda, Woody Allen, "The Dancing Wu Li Masters" by Gary Zudav, "The Secret Life of Plants" by Peter Tomkins, Eugen Ionescu, Samuel Beckett

Heroes:

There are all these people who actually smile in this fucked up world and I don't even know their names. One was on a stage reading her poetry for her first time. One was going to work at the Seven Eleven for the twelve-hundredth time, and he didn't complain. Another I saw walking out of a ward.

My Blog

Phishers

I have just been phished, and not only was I phished, the loosers also went on to post their lame-ass advertisements on all my friends comment boards. Just so you phishers out there know, I'm not angr...
Posted by Jamie on Fri, 03 Aug 2007 11:05:00 PST

When You See That Women

She doesn't look anything Like Shania Twain She is not tall She does not have Three inches of cleavage What I'm saying is She's perfect She ain´t turning The heads in the bar All, except one Word of ...
Posted by Jamie on Wed, 27 Jun 2007 09:53:00 PST

A Global Democratic Movement Is About to Pop

For anyone involved or wanting to get involved with social justice, community, sustainable development or conservation, here's an interesting article for you:A Global Democratic Movement Is About to P...
Posted by Jamie on Wed, 02 May 2007 10:52:00 PST

Where Children Might Play

We've got a pedigree dog We've got our bulbs Planted early A son heading to university We've got a new patio We've a Stairmaster downstairs And a plastic statue Embraced lovingly by Angry garden shrub...
Posted by Jamie on Mon, 16 Apr 2007 02:41:00 PST

Just a few statistics for you...

During an hour's swimming at a municipal pool you will ingest 1/12 liter of urine. In an average day your hands will have come into indirect contact with 15 penises (touching door handles, etc.) An av...
Posted by Jamie on Mon, 26 Mar 2007 01:07:00 PST

Thank You Card

I love youI appreciate your anal-nessOur friendship inspires me To tell old widowsI'll carry their groceries for themThen run awayWith their DependsTo go take a pissOn a War memorialOr to tell the boy...
Posted by Jamie on Thu, 22 Mar 2007 12:38:00 PST

Cherries (revised)

I can taste All the life of this day On your lips Cherries shied away, finally Even the black cherries in the Foot hills of Syria frown Some are caught blushing Because they know What's on my min...
Posted by Jamie on Sat, 17 Mar 2007 02:04:00 PST

Small Walnuts (revised)

I want to ask for her name And if I can watch The hazelnuts in her eyes ripen I want to taste The olive saltiness of that Little bit of summer she's got left On the back her neck I could ser...
Posted by Jamie on Sat, 24 Feb 2007 12:17:00 PST

Kudzu

Justify your existence Fortify your veins with ineptitude Blame your confusion on being In the wrong place At the right time Inhale the fumes of Your neighbor's last breath And sing him a eulogy A son...
Posted by Jamie on Wed, 07 Feb 2007 11:10:00 PST

Individual World Poetry Slam

Once again, my faith in humanity has been restored. There's nothing like standing in an over packed movie theatre screaming my vocal cords to kingdom come along with hundreds of other spoken word fans...
Posted by Jamie on Tue, 06 Feb 2007 11:30:00 PST