Matt - ProfilesArchive

About Me

I am a 2' 3", I have a bad b.o and flatulence problems and I also grow my own turnips. I once applied for a job behind the dairy counter in presto's, but apparently there was a height requirement, so needless to say I didn't get the job, so now I concentrate all my time on my turnips.
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You are 20% High-Maintenance!
You aren't high-maintenance at all. You seem to be a pretty relaxed and easygoing person, and you don't expect others to cater to your whims.

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My Interests

Music, Film, Football, socialising, reading, cooking.

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I'd like to meet:

Interesting people that float my boat

Music:

Beatles, Stones, Kinks, Small Faces, Dylan, The Doors, Woody Guthrie, Love, Focal Point, The Faces, Led Zeppelin, David Bowie, Springsteen, MC5, The Who, Neil Young, The Pogues, Kate Bush, Pink Floyd, Bowie, T Rex, REM, Air, Oasis, BRMC, Proclaimers, Doves, Super Furries, Damien Rice, Stevie Wonder, Badly Drawn Boy, Supergrass, Peter Bjorn and John, Hot Chip, Simple Kid, Grandaddy, Royksopp, Maximo Park, Futureheads, proud mary, handsome boy modelling school, avalanches, beta band, spiritualised, franz ferdinand, soulwax, the rapture, sixty6, Smiths,Kings of Convenience, Phoenix, (thats enough for now)

Movies:

Pulp Fiction, Usual Suspects, Lock Stock, Philadelphia, Forest Gump, A Hard Days Night, Dr Strangelove, Trainspotting, Silence of the lambs, Saw I,II and III, Life of Brian, Shawshank Redemption.

Television:

Match of the day, This Life, Shameless, Extras, early doors, rab c nesbitt, mock the week, 8/10 cats, jools, hells kitchen, shooting stars, saint and greavsie, only fools, family guy, flimpsons, soccer am, gilette soccer saturday...more to come later

Books:

The Viz Profanasaurus, You at the back, Fever Pitch, Filth, the last testament, light my fire, blazing fruit, bullit...more to come later

Heroes:

My Blog

A poem about Stephen Daniels

at school stoob would look down on us like we were dumb and he were brighter but now we can all laugh behind his back cos stoob is now a pillow biter with a brief case in his left hand full of ...
Posted by Matt on Tue, 30 Jan 2007 04:04:00 PST

Queens English

It strikes me, working in a University as I do, that there are a lot of false accents kicking around this gaff. My opinion is that half of these students prob left their folks homes, only recent...
Posted by Matt on Mon, 22 Jan 2007 01:55:00 PST

middle aged office worker types

I have a genuine hatred for these 40 odd year old office worker types, those with the ever expanding waist line who continually spout seven shades of shite every time they open their mouth. they...
Posted by Matt on Fri, 12 Jan 2007 04:07:00 PST

101 things for room 101

After the half hour bunkum that was Cill Black on Room 101 t'other night, I thought i'd post my 101 items that should be banished forever: 1 Mackems; 2 Cheesey Chips; 3 Charvers; 4 Burberry; 5 drivers...
Posted by Matt on Mon, 08 Jan 2007 03:52:00 PST

Has someone just floated an air biscuit?

There's a strange smell in here.
Posted by Matt on Thu, 07 Dec 2006 07:48:00 PST