Poppa Gus

They call me Poppa Gus but I've forgotten my real name. I'm a scientist. Wanna taste some of my soup? It's good I tell ya. I used to work at Brookhaven National Lab. I was forced to retire because I knew too much about the Manhattan Project. The men in the black suits came and took me away. They asked me lots of questions and attached electrodes to my bo-zack. All that radiation has driven me plum crazy. A long time ago this asian kid named Ben claimed that I abduct children in my basement. But he was just mislead by his slanty eyes. I make my own special moonshine in my basement. I got lots of chemicals in my basement that I brought home from the lab. Needless to say my pipes never need cleaning.I would never hurt anybody. I'm retired and I'm crazy and I wanna have fun with you whippersnappers and party it up.I wanna apologize for causing the neighborhood to be evacuated that time when I decided to dump way too many of those unlabeled chemicals down the drain. OoopsyBe my friend and I'll come over your house in my underwear and I'll bring you some special stew and show you the picture of Hemingway that I claim is me. I have great stories because I was a pimp and got mad puntang. I wish I was 25 again.(If you're looking for Charlie Murphy, I'm just studying for a part)