incest_survivors

Hi my name is Cecibel I am an incest survivor. The purpose of this page is to inform and aware a community about this horrible plaque that is infesting our nation. I am a spoke person for children and domestic violence victims. This is my story......
-1980-One morning I was awaken abruptley by my father hands. I was raped and severely damaged for the rest of my life. The person who I loved and trusted most destroyed my world. I was scared into silence because he threatnen he killed my mother if I said anything to someone. My life was a living hell and all I wanted was to die. Every night I will pray to god that he takes me away and spare me the pain of being raped over and over again. Every time it was more brutal and his limits didn't stop there. He abused me verbally, slaps, punches, burns everything bad that you can imagine I went through it but I am alive, I am hear probrably to help others or stop someone who is about to commit this terrible crime. I am the voice within of a child who desperately seeks justice, desperately needs a hand to walk into the light and be set free of the claws of hell rape.The Statistics...The U.S. Justice Department reports that by age 19, one in three girls and one in six boys will have been sexually assaulted or abused. Turning 19 without becoming a victim still is no guarantee of safety: One in four women and one in 10 men will be sexually assaulted or abused. If you or someone you know is a victim of abuse please reach out for help.Where to Get Help...National Sexual Assault Hotline 1-800-656-HOPEWomen Organized Against RAPE 1-215-985-3333Child Help USA 1-800-4A-CHILDhttp://www.rainn.org/http://www.aware.org/http ://www.rapecrisis.com/http://www.woar.org/http://www.prevent childabuse.org/index.shtmlRape is forced, unwanted sexual intercourse. Rape, sometimes also called sexual assault, can happen to both men and women of any age.Rape is about power, not sex. A rapist uses actual force or violence - or the threat of it - to take control over another human being. Some rapists use drugs to take away a person's ability to fight back. Rape is a crime, whether the person committing it is a stranger, a date, an acquaintance, or a family member.No matter how it happened, rape is frightening and traumatizing. People who have been raped need care, comfort, and a way to heal.What Should I Do? What's the right thing to do if you've been raped? Take care of yourself in the best way for you. For some people, that means reporting the crime immediately and fighting to see the rapist brought to justice. For others it means seeking medical or emotional care without reporting the rape as a crime. Every person is different.There are three things that everyone who has been raped should do, though:Know that the rape wasn't your fault. Seek medical care. Deal with your feelings. It's Not Your Fault Whatever happened, it wasn't your fault. No one has the right to have sex with you against your will. The blame for a rape lies solely with the rapist.Sometimes a rapist will try to exert even more power by making the person who's been raped feel like it was actually his or her fault. A rapist may say stuff like, "You asked for it," or "You wanted it." This is just another way for the rapist to take control. The truth is that what a person wears, what a person says, or how a person acts is never a justification for rape.Most people who are raped know their rapists. That can sometimes lead the person who's been raped to try to protect the perpetrator. Make protecting yourself your priority; don't worry about protecting the person who raped you. If you want to report the crime, do so. If you don't feel comfortable reporting it, though, you don't have to. Do whatever helps you feel safe and heal - without blaming yourself.Seek Medical Care The first thing someone who has been raped needs to do is see a medical doctor. Most medical centers and hospital emergency departments have doctors and counselors who have been trained to take care of someone who has been raped. It's important to get medical care because a doctor will need to check you for sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) and internal injuries.Most areas have local rape hotlines listed in the phone book that can give you advice about where to go for medical help. You may want to have a friend or family member go along for support, especially if you're feeling upset and unsafe. Some rape crisis centers also provide advocates who can go along with you. You can also call the national sexual assault hotline at (800) 656-HOPE.If you are under 18 and don't want your parents to know about the rape, I ask you sincerely to seek there help first. It's a good idea to ask the rape crisis center about the laws in your area. Many jurisdictions treat rape exams confidentially, but some will require that a parent or guardian be notified.You should get medical attention right away without changing your clothes, showering, douching, or washing. It can be hard not to clean up, of course - it's a natural human instinct to wash away all traces of a sexual assault. But being examined right away is the best way to ensure you get proper medical treatment.Immediate medical attention also helps when people decide to report the crime, providing evidence needed to prosecute the rapist if a criminal case is pursued. If you've been raped and think you don't want to report it, you could change your mind later - this often happens - and having the results of a medical exam can help you do this. (There are laws, known as statutes of limitations, that give a person only a certain amount of time to pursue legal action for a crime, though, so be sure you know how long you have to report the rape. A local rape crisis center can advise you of the laws in your area.)Even if you don't get examined right away, it doesn't mean you can't get a checkup later. It's always best to see a doctor immediately after a rape, of course. But a person can still go to a doctor or local clinic to get checked out for STDs, pregnancy, or injuries any time after being raped. In some cases, doctors can even gather evidence several days after a rape has occurred.What Happens During the Medical Exam? When you go to the hospital after a rape, a trained counselor or social worker will listen while you talk about what happened. Talking to a trained listener can help you begin to release some of the emotions you are probably feeling so that you can start to feel calm and safe again.The counselor may also talk with you about the medical exam and what it involves. Each state or jurisdiction has different requirements, of course, but here are some of the things that may happen during the medical exam:A medical professional will test you for STDs, including HIV/AIDS. These tests may involve taking blood or saliva samples. Although the thought of getting an STD after a rape is extremely scary, the quicker a person finds out about any infection, the more effectively he or she can be treated. Doctors can start you on immediate treatment courses for STDs, including HIV/AIDS, that will greatly increase your protection against developing these diseases.If you're female, a medical professional may treat you to prevent an unwanted pregnancy, if you wish. A medical professional will examine you internally to check for any injury that might have been caused by the rape. A medical professional or trained technician may look for and take samples of the rapist's hair, skin, nails, or bodily fluids from your clothes or body. If you think you've been given a rape drug, a doctor or technician can test for this, too. Be aware that this toxicology test covers any and all illegal drugs. At any time during the medical exam, you can say if you don't want a certain test performed or evidence collected. All procedures are being done to help you, so you have control over which procedures you'd like done, as well as a say in any you don't want.Dealing With Feelings Rape isn't just physically damaging, it can be emotionally traumatic as well. The right emotional attention, care, and support can help a person begin the healing process and prevent lingering problems later on.Someone who has been raped might feel a lot of things: angry, degraded, frightened, numb, or confused. It's also normal for someone who has been raped to feel ashamed or embarrassed. Some people withdraw from friends and family. Others don't want to be alone. Some feel depressed, anxious, or nervous.Sometimes the feelings surrounding rape may show up in physical ways, such as trouble sleeping or eating. It may be hard to concentrate in school or to participate in everyday activities. Sometimes it may feel like you'll never get over the trauma of the rape. Experts often refer to these emotions - and their physical side effects - as rape trauma syndrome. The best way to work through them is with professional help.It can be hard to think or talk about a frightening experience, especially something as personal as rape. People who have been raped sometimes avoid seeking help because they're afraid that talking about it will bring back memories or feelings that are too painful. But this can actually do more harm than good.Talking about rape in a safe environment with the help and support of a trained professional is the best way to ensure long-term healing. Working through the pain sooner rather than later can help reduce symptoms like nightmares and flashbacks. It can also help people avoid potentially harmful behaviors and emotions, like major depression or self-injury.Hope , Healing and Beyond In knowledge there is power, and empowerment for the incest survivors to overcome the effect of there victimization. I hope that my testimony serves as a motivational analysis of the consequences and affter effects of what you may feel. I hope in here I help yourself, your love ones and other women who are in this situation. I hope this page touches an individual life to the extent to know that there not alone and think of your life in a diffrent way not only about incest, but also about other human experiences such as Child abuse and domestic violence. Reading my page pehaps will not change a person's life. No problem as traumatic in its effects and as deeply wounded as incest can be resolved with only words of inspiration.Even though I dearly hope that it can. The survivor can pursue this painful and challenging journey in many ways. Some involve working with a therapist; some do not. Many survivors find that psycotherapy in combination with self help groups is more productive than one indiviadually. Other activities may also enhace recovery to a more peaceful and accepting life. Certain affter effects clearly on incest or another type of abuse.* Blocking out some period of early years or person. * Night terror Alienation from body Intolerance to being touched Self inflicting, self injury A desire of acting promicuos, or sexual incapacity Difficulty with water Desire to change name Gag reflex ( incest victims) may suffer this sensation. Innapropiate clothing. Dark baggy and very conservative. uncomfortable using public bathrooms A pattern an relationship with older and more powerful partners Alcohol, addictive disorders.After effects 1-2-5-9-12- 13 were very true in my life. I underwent all of these effects and continue to have night terror. I remember as child being scared of the night because I knew I was soon going to be attacked. Darkness scared me. I remember the ticking of the clock and me curling up in my bed awaiting for the monster to come in and kill my innocence over and over again. If you are troubled with any of the after effects in the list or you or a loved one may have been subjected to any type of abuse and is living in silence and encountering these side effect (please seek help imediately) In therapeutic services, workshop, writing and other activities. Recovery services help survivors change there auto destructive behaviors and heal from a violated and bruised childhood.Empowerment to heal by healing other lives.Many times I've been faced with questions that can be hurting even perhaps disrespecful. Like such.... Why are you doing this? Is it for the money? No its not. I don't ask anyone for monetary contributions. Money is not going going to put together my fractured self. Money will not give me back my childhood, my father and every dream that was broken with this attack. You know what will fufill me? Knowing I made a difference in someone's life. A tiny remote difference gives me happiness. I'm a simple person who struggles with life adversities. I work, have a family and comfront pretty much the things a regular human being has to comfront. I do this on my own time yes I would like to dedicate my everything to this cause but unfourtanately it will take time before my contribution will entirely shine all the way. It takes many bricks to construct a path the last one will be when I see less molestation, less rape cases and more awareness. So I believe I have a long journey to walk. But my faith will never stop. That is why I encourage you not break down. You made it this far already, survive to live, live to survive well.