Lacie

My cat is fairly convinced that he is a dog. I used to own (and sport) a pair of jungle-print parachute pants that I would tight-roll at the bottoms. I hate hate hate gum. HATE! I'm serious, I hate it with an undying passion. I've recently renewed my dancing fool status after a 6-year hiatus. I am and always have been an avid hater of most reality tv shows. Jesus is the center of my universe. I don't live my life perfectly, but I'm covered by grace and amazed daily. I hate that it's become so institutionalized, and I'm out to break the manmade mold wherever I can. I had a diagnosed phobia of vomit that affected my every-day life for 13 years. I wish I knew how to surf. I think I want to try as many extreme activities as I can, but it's possible I may chicken out on the ledge of the plane at 40,000 feet. I have an weird obsession with flying (every year before my 10th birthday I would secretly wish over my candles that one day I could just "up and away" like Superman), and I usually have at least one flying dream a night (which is of course my favorite dream to have). I need to get my pilot's license one day. Also I used to have an unhealthy fascination with tornados. I'm still intrigued by them, and I still become overly excited under green mammatus clouds. I recently got the gift of drawing miraculously and it has not left me yet. I am planning on attending film school in Hawaii next year and then going into documentaries...perhaps in Africa. I once spent an unwarranted weekend alone in jail and was charged with a felony (but I was not at fault and the charge was dismissed). Although I was the punk rock anti-spirit chick all through school, I almost married a male cheerleader in college. I suppose the opposites attract theory is vaguely true. My short-term memory is for crap, but somehow my long-term memory is nearly superb (my earliest memory is from infancy), and I am great at recalling faces. I'm a big fan of stand-up comedy. More specifically: Louis CK, Zach Galifianakis, Pablo Francisco, Eddie Murphy, Mitch Hedberg, Steven Wright, Brian Regan, Dane Cook, and others. I have never traveled further West than New Orleans in the States. I am dying to see the Grand Canyon. As of January 2007 I've finally traveled out of the country (to England and Tanzania), not including the third world country I went to as a child, where I kept my game face on around the starving, diseased and naked beggars in town until I saw the first starving, diseased canine, where I immediately broke down in sobs...which brings me to my next item. I'm sort of one of those animal people. I'm drawn particularly to cats, possibly because there's always been a cat living with me my whole life. Um. I am a big fan of board games and jigsaw puzzles. I am absolutely terrified of roaches...I would more quickly be assaulted by a spider than be touched by a palmetto bug. I once was a member of an elite neighborhood New Kids On The Block fanclub, and I was Joey MacIntyre's 10-year-old female counterpart, pre-determined to be his wife. Joey never replied to my letters or my homemade dedication music video, so I finally threw out my 10" ceramic Joey heart throb button and moved onto Sean Astin (Memphis Belle era). Throughout the years following, my celebrity crushes shifted from Rikki Rockett to Eddie Furlong to Michael Schoeffling to Keanu Reeves to Brad Pitt to Jason London to Billy Joe Armstrong, and finally settled on a contemporary top 5 (minus the creepy reservations, of course). When I get really frightened my eyes water. Most ghost stories make my eyes water, however they fascinate the pants off me. Heh. Pants. There is something so majestic about clear ocean water over white sand, and I got to live the dream and swim in it off the coast of Tanzania (look at my pics, there's on in there). I was the district spelling bee champion for two consecutive years in grade school. Shut up. I used to be a flute virtuoso. SHUT UP! I also got to play violin for Queen Elizabeth (and totally saw Downtown Julie Brown in her infamous black pinstripe suit...cool points redeemed). I cannot swallow pills. In college I finished an entire crossword puzzle book every week (cool points lost). I love childish bodily function humor, and there's not a whole lot I appreciate more than someone who can tell me a funny poop story. I hate the following words for no apparent reason: asbestos, delicious, lipid, & undulate. Take a wild guess what my favorite word is. I have never been stung, and I have never broken a bone nor sprained anything more than a toe. And I am an epitomist dweeb, but by now you already know that.