My name is William Burroughs - and I am not real. profile picture

My name is William Burroughs - and I am not real.

I don't have the chest to be a transvestite.

About Me

I'll write it on the typewriter and mail it to you tonight.

My Interests

Writing, art, 20th Century literature, films, films, films, and drinking - I guess.

I'd like to meet:

Jesus, Dick Van Dyke, and Bucky O'Hare.

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Music:

The Dandy Warhols; The Brian Jonestown Massacre; Mew; Pulp; Naked Lunch; Buddy Holly; The Cure; New Order; Blind Melon; James Brown; Jazz; Ladytron; Fischerspooner; Tears For Fears; Blondie; Nat King Cole; Frank Sinatra...

Movies:

Brazil; Donnie Darko; Naked Lunch; Coffee And Cigarettes; Frankenstein (with Karloff The Uncanny); Bride Of Frankenstein; O Brother, Where Aret Thou?; Plan 9 From Outer Space; Josie And The Pussycats; Beat; Singing In The Rain; Bride Of The Monster; Teenagers From Outer Space; Super Mario Bros.; Tank Girl; The Mummy (with Boris Karloff); Who Framed Roger Rabbit; Fight Club; Ed Wood; Citizen Kane; Fritz Lang's Metropolis; the odd Charlie Chaplin movie here and there; The Cat's Meow; Barbarella; The Breakfast Club; Dracula (with Bela Lugosi); Nosferatu, Le Voyage Dans La Lune, and... .. Forbidden Zone

Television:

Monkey Dust, The Mighty Boosh, The Powerpuff Girls, Diagnosis Murder, ALF, Quantum Leap, Freakazoid, Mystery Science Theatre 3000 - Hell yeah!

Books:

On The Road (by Jack Kerouac), Big Sur (also by Kerouac) - in fact, anything by Kerouac is bound to be great! Naked Lunch (by William S. Burroughs); Nineteen Eighty-Four (by George Orwell). I'm intelligibibble.

Heroes:

Jack Kerouac, Jools Holland, Batman (he's the coolest superhero of them all - he's just a normal rich man...but he's got LOADS AND LOADS OF TOYS!!! If I were Batman I'd buy loads of cool things like a pool table and a juke box, and then I'd play with them for hours until I see the Bat Signal, and then I'd get into my clothes, hop into my bad-ass automobile, and soar into the night! Brrrrrmmmmm!!!!!!) To the extreme.

My Blog

On The Busses.

Mankind's existence is a poor one. The scene: Today's the day my bus route changed. I was chuffed because it was a big snazzy posh bus, but narked because the price had gone up by a pound. Before me ...
Posted by My name is William Burroughs - and I am not real. on Mon, 19 Feb 2007 11:06:00 PST

Editorial VII

Editorial: May 2005 http://groups.msn.com/HouseOfMan   The gentleman Summer prepares to reside within our welcome arms, and with him imposes the glory of inspiration upon us. We, the purveyo...
Posted by My name is William Burroughs - and I am not real. on Sat, 15 Apr 2006 03:05:00 PST

Editorial VI

Editorial: 10th March 2006 http://groups.msn.com/HouseOfMan   The Exalted Glutton passed through the double door. A dusty red carpet, crusted with dried vomit unravelled at his feet, enteri...
Posted by My name is William Burroughs - and I am not real. on Sat, 11 Mar 2006 02:23:00 PST

Editorial V

Editorial: 7th February 2006 http://groups.msn.com/HouseOfMan   Buddy Lee awoke as the cab entered Moscow city centre. His head was resting upon the clean, pressed, white suit, hearing the a...
Posted by My name is William Burroughs - and I am not real. on Mon, 13 Feb 2006 08:23:00 PST

Shakespeare.

Sonnet To The 'Onnaise   FABIO: Alas, I doth weep for my mayonnaise. Woe, woe betide upon my weary soul, My cherished mayonnaise hath left me now.   Mercushio, thou shalt chariot my cart upo...
Posted by My name is William Burroughs - and I am not real. on Tue, 24 Jan 2006 04:54:00 PST

Editorial IV

Editorial: 11th January 2006 http://groups.msn.com/HouseOfMan   SHE returned the kernel back to the punch bowl and observed over the room with attentive curiosity. Thin, straight, blonde hai...
Posted by My name is William Burroughs - and I am not real. on Sun, 15 Jan 2006 09:33:00 PST

Editorial III

Editorial: 9th December 2005 http://groups.msn.com/HouseOfMan   THE discovery of America. Christmas, New England 1776. He stared around the table. To the left sat Charles Darwin, at the end of th...
Posted by My name is William Burroughs - and I am not real. on Fri, 09 Dec 2005 11:05:00 PST

The Day Of Reckoning.

The enemy army has infiltrated our headquarters. Chances of destruction from the inside is critical. Our investigators must seek out the enemy spies - the antibodies must fight hard - our co...
Posted by My name is William Burroughs - and I am not real. on Sun, 27 Nov 2005 10:46:00 PST

Concideration.

"How's it going Will?!" "No, that's Will," "Oh...How's it going Will?!"
Posted by My name is William Burroughs - and I am not real. on Sat, 19 Nov 2005 08:14:00 PST

Editorial II.

Editorial: 10th November 2005 http://groups.msn.com/HouseOfMan   HOME, sweet, sweet home. Reflecting on the day, as though looking through a mirror, it stared straight back at him. Arriving in th...
Posted by My name is William Burroughs - and I am not real. on Thu, 10 Nov 2005 03:56:00 PST