life is so beautiful and i couldn't be more thankful. i love animals. a lot. i dont kill anything on purpose. i really like late nights. i'm far from perfect and full of love. I'm old fashioned not naive. i'm drawn to anything graceful and romantic. charming and honest. sincere and simple.
i do this thing with my feet when i can't sleep where i rub them back and forth on the covers on top of them or against each other. i dont wash my hair everyday. i have two cats and a hamster that have more life experience than most people i've met. they teach me everyday about resilience, love, patience, and honesty. long story short griffen has 3 legs and lucy has no teeth (if you care to hear the story ask away...but be warned if you get me started about animals you're in for an earfull). like to have the tv on when im trying to fall asleep. i'll turn away from it and be laying there dead tired but if its not programmed to a show i like i just cant pass out. its sort of annoying. i'm living alone for the first time in my life and i couldn't be happier. who thought i could actually pull off this whole adult thing? i walk down the street just about everyday smiling and laughing to myself. i love the way the sun feels on my shoulders. i can't wear enough dresses. i live in tights and a leotard and that really bothers caroline for some reason haha. i go to musical theatre school and its where my heart and my head lie at the moment. i spend anywhere between 8-12hours a day there during the week and then my entire weekend doing homework and sleeping to recover from the week. i love to read. my ipod tends to dictate my mood for the day. not that im nutty and unstable but it just influences me so. i love the idea of travel yet i've been hardly anywhere. im incredibly driven and yet a lazy bum at the same time. i try to stay as far away from politics as possible. i tend to come off brattier than i really am. born and raised in california and missing it, family and friends, everyday. no one cares enough to actually read this. if anyone is actually reading this just send me a message that says macaroni. thats all it has to say...macaroni. (im being totally serious right now but if you know what im referencing i will love you instantly). i laugh at damn near everything. i believe in appreciating people completely or not. so either you love the things that make them insane or you move on to the next crazy person. im vulnerable but not weak. im open to whatever comes my way but im not stupid when it comes to making choices. im terrified of just about everything but i will always jump. i will never hurt you intentionally.
im not trying to figure myself out because i feel like its coming to me more and more everyday and the anticipation of that understanding is lovely in itself. im sorry but i have no idea whats going on most of the time. why i say the things i do, why i do the things i say. im lost and upside down and i dont know what my next step is but im stepping anyways. i'll watch where i walk but im always moving. im trying. im giving. there is nothing more i can do in this life than to do just that. i may go in the absolute wrong direction but at least im moving in a direction at all. if i have to turn around ok. if i have to start again i will. there are people in my life that love me no matter what stupid things i do and thats all i need to know.
