Baronvonnmonkey profile picture

Baronvonnmonkey

I don't speak any english, just American without tears.

About Me

I hate these about me pages. How does one tell you about me in a couple of paragraphs? Well I guess no one will know if it's really about me or not so here goes... I have a tail. I was Elvis Presley's still born twin risen from the card board box I was buried in. I play with dolls and can fly. I have a porcupine quill surgically implanted in my arm which has gotten me out of many a tight spot. I've never worshiped the devil but think his music is pretty good. I prefer mints over chocolate and someday hope to become a better trumpet player. Enough about me, how was your day? a

My Interests

Vintage toys (MEGO and MARX) and vintage cars. Also music, movies, books, and working on my art and my house(Which often overlap). Puppets and other puppeteers, I like 'em. Here's a sampling of some of my artwork which you will be able to view at baronvonnmonkey.com as soon as I get off of my lazy ass and finish painting my icons(sorry Ben)!

I'd like to meet:

I'm looking for people who can preform any sideshow/circus arts, expertly or as a novice. The only requirement is you have to be willing to do it and not be afraid to look like an ass! Hula hoops, jugglers, magicians, sword swallowers and the lot! Anyone who can present an idea, even if it's an unpopular one, in an entertaining and/or interesting manner. Puppeters. B-movie and monster movie lovers especially zombie movies. Or monkeys that can type really well.Please send me an e-mail before you send me a friend request, it's polite and I will be ever so impressed by your good manors as well as your smart looks! If you are a band 9 out of 10 times you can fuck off, I won't add your shitty ass band because you suck. If you actually have taken the time to read what I like and think I may like your music, then send me an e-mail first and I will give you a fair shake. When I click on a profile and see that music banner odds are I will deny you before the music has a chance to start, so please, take a minute and tell me what you're about and let me decide If I want to add you. Thanks!

Music:

I'm an oldschool punk, so you know I have a weakness for the old SST, Alternative Tentacles and such. I love rockabilly, shockabilly, trashabilly, psychobilly and all the other variations of this genre'. I listen to lots of old country music, jazz, no-wave and straight up noise. I swing dance and am no longer trying to learn bagpipes as it is hard and I am really lazy.

Movies:

My favorite movies are the Living dead trilogy as well as most of the zombie stuff, "28 days later", "Evil dead" etc. (I loves me some zombies!) I am a huge fan of the old universal monsters and most b-movies. I just watched the b-classic "Spiderbaby" everyone should go see it tomorrow, it rules! Some of my other favorites are "The Big lebowski", "Withnail and I" and the "I Claudius" mini series from the 70's. The movies I've seen most recently that I loved has to be "The Ring" and "Battle Royale". Last seen in the theater was There Will be Blood, great fucking movie that was! I think I could go on and on here.."Rushmore", "The royal tennembaums", "Barfly", True Stories"and on and on and on........

Television:

I must confess, I love Star Trek. There, I said it, I feel so much better now! I also love Six feet under, Carnivale', and most of the older sci-fi shows such as twilight zone and Lost in space and of course the Adam West Batman. I watch Zorro whenever I have the chance, it was pointed out to me recently, that my love for zorro might be more than just a little gay. But hey, I never liked asparagus before either. Besides, Guy Williams is easy on the eyes and looks great in that outfit! Get me a shovel, I'm in love! I also sign up for all of those dry english shows, The Black Adder, Dr. Who, The Red Dwarf, Monty python as well as the north american counterparts, The kids in the hall, Mr. Show, Sifl and Olly, and more t.v. than I care to think about!

Books:

Here's a list of my favorite books in no paticular order; "American Gods"Neil Gaiman, "Geek Love"Kathrine Dunn, "A Confederacy of Dunces" John Kennedy O'Toole, "Kitchen Confidential" Anthony Bourdain, Everything written by David Sedaris, "High Fidelity" Nick Hornsby, "Down and out in Paris and London" George Orwell, Most works by Dylan Thomas, "Everything that rises must converge" Flannery O'Conner, "Mr. Vertigo"by Paul auster, Harlan Ellison, Phillip K. Dick... I could probably go on all night with this list, I love to read, but all of these people and books I've read more than once, there are more, but I'm drawing a blank right now.

Heroes:

Gordon Parks and Johnny Cash. I'm inspired by alot of people all of the time, but these two are forces of nature that trancended the box they were cast in and constantly reinvented themselves. If I'm anything at all like either of these men then I feel like I've done something right with my life.

My Blog

When it comes to love.

When it comes to love, especially the romantic kind, I was completely blocked emotionally, I could not let receive it and would find myself kind of awkward and uncomfortable like a kid in a holiday pa...
Posted by Baronvonnmonkey on Wed, 25 Jun 2008 04:10:00 PST

I just Love Meghan!

I love Meghan! Let me tell you about it. Sometimes she can be a complete bitch, she's often seems cold and distant. Not a person that is worthy of such adoration you might think but that's where you ...
Posted by Baronvonnmonkey on Sun, 15 Jun 2008 05:22:00 PST

Pursuit of Passion

I'm attracted to passion.The more I think about it the more I see a pattern. I sometimes think I'm in love with love. Not the real thing per say, just the concept. I feel terrible, a failure when the ...
Posted by Baronvonnmonkey on Sat, 07 Jun 2008 02:35:00 PST

Mean nasty rant, ggrrrrrrrrrr

Sartre had it right. Hell really is other people.   It's hard enough just dealing with the minor bullshit that is life, but when you compound that with the thoughtless self centeredness of p...
Posted by Baronvonnmonkey on Sat, 07 Jun 2008 02:31:00 PST

I need a hobby, seriously.

 When you're in it, time seems to be vast and almost never ending. If you stop and think about it there is such a small amount allotted to us and it's really not much to accomplish anything in ex...
Posted by Baronvonnmonkey on Sat, 07 Jun 2008 04:36:00 PST

I am a Werewolf

I wrote most of this last year, I'm posting it at the request of a couple of friends who wanted to read it, please forgive the disjointed rambling, it's a philosophy in progress.    I am a w...
Posted by Baronvonnmonkey on Sat, 07 Jun 2008 04:31:00 PST

Sideshow preformers wanted!

I'm trying to put together a small troupe to preform around the country at conventions, venues, fairs and the like. Jugglers, magicians, sword swallowers, hula hooping, tight rope walking etc.Contact ...
Posted by Baronvonnmonkey on Wed, 07 May 2008 10:59:00 PST

Life on the road and fake dookie!

Well I'm on the road again with a whole new bout of shows. We just finished Dallas Frightmare weekend. and are spending a couple of days here before driving to Detroit for a tattoo Convention.  A...
Posted by Baronvonnmonkey on Mon, 25 Feb 2008 11:08:00 PST

The 13th Annual Motor City Tattoo

I'll be in Detroit this upcoming weekend for the The 13th Annual Motor City Tattoo Expo. Come on out and see my stuff, hang out and be groovy! I'll be set up next to Evil Brand Clothing and Lost Video...
Posted by Baronvonnmonkey on Mon, 25 Feb 2008 10:37:00 PST

Dallas

Is where I'll be!...
Posted by Baronvonnmonkey on Thu, 21 Feb 2008 10:07:00 PST