Bastard Stepchild profile picture

Bastard Stepchild

Keep your enemies distant, and a howitzer close by

About Me

ABOUT ME:1. I hate pimps. 2. I hate crack dealers. 3. I don't give two fucks about swagger. 4. I worship Xenu. If any of the above-mentioned are things which you hold dear, please do not waste my time and yours, and leave this page at once, as we will have no common ground, and I will most likely only antagonize you. Best regards, Rich Grant AKA Bastard Stepchild . . .P.S.- I, too, am a devout worshipper and follower of the evil Lord Xenu. HAIL XENU!!!

My Interests

Music:

Member Since: 9/12/2006
Band Website: druglabrecords.com
Band Members: Bastard Stepchild (Rich Grant)- Vocals, lyrics, drum machines, synthesizers, samplers, bass, turntables, REX, coffee, guitar// J-Lo Biafra (Rich Grant)- Fur coats, diamond-crusted Anarchy medallions, gay vocals, champagne, Vietnamese strippers// Crazy Rich (Rich Grant)- Game show host vocals, accordion, banjo, dead cat, corny hype-man, tuba, pot, bagpipes, ukelele, banjo Chrysler Gook (Rich Grant)- Fake gangster-thug vocals
Influences: Caffeine, life, alcohol, pot, war, math, Jesus. When these things don't help me find inspiration, I smoke crack . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .PEOPLE: Trey Parker and Matt Stone, Terry Gilliam, Sergeant Major Francisco D. Cortez, First Sergeant Byron McCracklin, Joanne Kaawaloa, Colonel David Hackworth, Terry Jones, Jim Gavin, Michael Palin, Graham Chapman, John Cleese, Eric Idle, Jason McHugh, Malcolm X, Carl Sagan, Bugs Bunny, the 442nd Infantry Regiment (GO FOR BROKE), Gary Larson, Ho Chi Minh, Stephan M. Pastis, Richard Pryor, Eddie Izzard, Jello Biafra, Dave Chapelle, Jon Stewart, Ron White, Penn and Teller, Ron Paul, Lewis Black, Bill Maher, Chris Rock, Stephen Colbert, George Jones AKA Elmo Tociclista . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . MUSIC: Digital Underground, Meat Beat Manifesto, Redman, 2pac, the Fu-Schnickens, Das Efx, Mike Oldfield, Weird Al Yankovic, Guttermouth, Johnny Cash, A Tribe Called Quest, King Tee, tha Alkaholiks, N.W.A., Ice-T, Public Enemy, Kool Moe Dee, 311, Primus, the Dead Milkmen, D.V.D.A., Technotronic, Ed OG and the Bulldogs, 3rd Bass, 2 Live Crew, A.M.G., the Beastie Boys, RUN! D.M.C., Black Sheep, the Roots, E.P.M.D., Eric B. and Rakim, Funkdoobiest, Gang Starr, Ice Cube, Wu Tang Clan, Jeru the Damaja, Kam, LL Cool J, Outkast, Newcleus, the Clash, Dead Kennedys, DMX, Bad Religion, Carl Stalling, Prince, the Sneaker Pimps, Ministry, the Bloodhound Gang, Sheila E, Prince, Electric Six, Kool Keith, the U.M.C.s, Fatboy Slim, Toddy Walters, Nas, Tom Waits, NYOIL, Y.Y. Merks, Nofx, Jimi Hendrix, the Doors, George Clinton and Parliament Funkadelic, Morris Day and the Time, Threat . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .BOOKS: About Face, the Art of War, the Hitchhiker's Guide series, Freakonomics, the Autobiography of Malcolm X, LIES and the Lying Liars Who Tell Them, Private Parts, Thidwick the Big-Hearted Moose, I am America (and so Can You!), All You Need to know About the Music Business . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . COMICS: Pearls Before Swine, the Far Side, the Boondocks, Calvin and Hobbes, Get Fuzzy, Edible Dirt . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ART: M.C. Escher . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .MOVIES: Monty Python and the Holy Grail, CANNIBAL! the Musical, Idiocracy, Shaun of the Dead, South Park: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut, Jabberwocky, Orgazmo, the Life of Brian, Zoolander, SLC Punk, Team America World Police, Harold and Kumar go to White Castle, the Bourne series, O Brother, Where Art Thou?, L.A. Story, the Emperor's New Groove, Monty Python's the Meaning of Life, Swordfish, As Good as it Gets, Dirty Rotten Scoundrels, Baseketball, Half-Baked, Ice Age, Fight Club, Deep Cover, 28 Days Later, the Blair Witch Project, Boyz N the Hood, Patton, Hot Fuzz, Indiana Jones, the original 3 Star Wars, Full Metal Jacket, Unforgiven . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . TV: South Park, the Daily Show, Monty Python's Flying Circus, the Colbert Report, BULLSHIT!, Beavis and Butthead, Chapelle's Show, Survivorman, Planet Earth as You've Never Seen it Before, Aqua Teen Hunger Force, That's My Bush!, Wonder Showzen, Fawlty Towers, MXC, Lewis Black's Root of All Evil
Sounds Like: Someone who drinks a lot of caffeine and is severely dismayed by the current state of hip-hop and America. Rage Against the Machine meets the Bloodhound Gang meets Digital Underground meets Public Enemy meets Monty Python's Flying Circus.
Record Label: DrugLab Records
Type of Label: Indie

My Blog

Trey Parker & Matt Stone - Time Warped pt 1/3

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2b00c2EDo4A ...
Posted by Bastard Stepchild on Tue, 15 Jul 2008 05:19:00 PST

Psychics . . . are . . . BULLSHIT!!!

I . . . am Bastard Stepchild. I am . . . flypaper for the walking-wounded and mentally unstable. That being said, I was having this off and on relationship with this really kooky chick, because that's...
Posted by Bastard Stepchild on Thu, 03 Jul 2008 05:04:00 PST

No Sympathy.

What with writing several projects, studying my ass off, and working a new job, its been a while since I've put up a blog of any importance, whatsoever. Therefore, tonight I bring you all the most imp...
Posted by Bastard Stepchild on Fri, 06 Jun 2008 10:51:00 PST

Where do breakdancing bears come from?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pkjTM4AfYdU Jurassic 5, of course!...
Posted by Bastard Stepchild on Sat, 31 May 2008 12:58:00 PST

Thrall's Crib - World of Warcraft Parody

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qUOcXCHf5jI ...
Posted by Bastard Stepchild on Sun, 18 May 2008 06:10:00 PST

Even More Silly

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eXH1g7EvS0E ...
Posted by Bastard Stepchild on Sat, 10 May 2008 03:40:00 PST

More Silly

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pnoaj8b2bGM This is why I love the internet. This is the coolest song I have ever heard. Its as if the Swedish Chef decided to make reggaeton....
Posted by Bastard Stepchild on Fri, 09 May 2008 05:25:00 PST

Silly

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lv-v_B7K-Po ...
Posted by Bastard Stepchild on Wed, 07 May 2008 01:41:00 PST

Fun at the Expense of Others

Anyone who knows me knows that I love to play jokes on people, its just my nature. Well, this year, April Fool’s Day came and went, and I couldn’t pull my prank on everyone. Damn fucking s...
Posted by Bastard Stepchild on Wed, 02 Apr 2008 11:24:00 PST

Cristal.

Recently, I had to choose a wine to write an essay on. I chose Cristal. Enjoy.Cristal ChampagneAn essay by "Crazy Rich" Grant AKA Bastard StepchildDespite incendiary, possibly racially charged (as per...
Posted by Bastard Stepchild on Sat, 19 Jan 2008 01:59:00 PST