El Ib-Raden profile picture

El Ib-Raden

pork ... the other white slang term for sex

About Me

You can learn pretty much all you need to know about me by watching season 3 of "Moonlighting" in it's entirety while brushing your teeth with Hershey chocolate syrup ... I have a black belt in rape ... I was kicked out of MENSA for pooping on the floor ... Kittens in leotards get me strangely excited ...

My Interests

Tsao's Chicken

I'd like to meet:

Arthur Rimbaud, The 1979 Minnesota Vikings, fundamentalist Muslims, Lou Diamond Phillips, a decent plumber, Kool Moe Dee, the cast of "The Courtship of Eddie's Father", Julian Lennon, Christian singles in my area, cokeheads

Music:

I like the 2 best songs on every album ever made ...

Movies:

"Not Another Porn Movie", "Must Love Dogs"

Television:

I like most of the 1/4 of TV channels in Los Angeles that broadcast in English ...

Books:

the Yellow Pages, pamphlets, the Bible, "The Rules"

Heroes:

Quentin Tarantino, Madonna, Hunter S. Thompson, Jack Black, Camille Paglia, Jesus (not the "God's son" dude, just this guy who sells me weed in Echo Park), Sinatra, anybody who died before they started making shitty albums