MARK AMPARO

i like to party hard....-I'm mexican or live next door to one -Our chicks & dudes are WAYYYY hotter than yours - I say "like" and "for sure" and "right on" and "dude" and "totally" and "peace out" and "chill" and "tight" and I say them often - I know what real cheese & avocadoes taste like -All the porn you watch is made here, cause we fuck better and thats how it is - I don't get snowdays off because theres only snow in Mammoth, Tahoe and Big Bear - I can wear sandals all year long - I go to the Beach - not "down to the shore" - I know 65 mph really means 80 - When someone cuts me off, they get the horn and the finger and they accept it and give it back, because that's the California way - The drinking age is 21 but everyone starts at 14 (legally 18 if you live close enough to the border) (woohoo "Avenida Revolucion") - My governor can kick your governors ass - I can go out at midnight -When asked where you're from, you give your area code -You judge people based on what area code they live in - I might get looked at funny by locals when I'm on vacation in their state, but when they find out I'm from California I turn into a Greek GOD - We don't stop at stop signs... we do a "california roll" No cop no stop baby! - I can get fresh and REAL Mexican food 24 hours a day - All the TV shows you "other" states watch get filmed here - We have In-N-Out (Arizona and Vegas are lucky we share that with them) - I have the most representation in the House of Representatives, which means MY opinion means more than yours, which means I'm better than you %D%A