he ain't shit profile picture

he ain't shit

My first name must be he ain't shit! Cuz when I'm riding in the car bitchez be like he ain't shit! .

About Me

My real name is Joe, but my good friends and family have been calling me "Oli" for as long as I can remember. I basically grew up in Bradenton, FL where I had some of the best times of my life causing trouble with good friends. I'm a pretty mellow person and I don't get noticibly stressed out very easily. I've been bartending for the last couple of years. Bartending can very easily be the best job in the world and the worst job in the world, usually depending on the age of your patrons. In other words, when you have a young crowd it can be fun, when you have an older crowd of lifetime wife-cheating-on, "never went nowhere" old bastards it makes you want to swear off drinking forever. I totally bullshitted my way all through highschool. I thought college would be just as easy, but I'm finding that it actually takes a bit of effort. I'll be at UF in the spring, so I guess I'll be a Florida Gator. They have a great football team, although that really has nothing to do with my decision to attend this particualar school. I spend most of my free time playing guitar or practicing my bass. I've actually been playing bass and singing in a band ( Towering Inferno, ) for like 5 years. I think we have a great deal of talent and potential so there's a good chance you might actually hear about us one day.Oh yeah, and I speak Spanish.
Ok tell you what...
If you can be just as loyal, loving, and fun as this dog while also having soft shiny hair to boot then you can take her place in this picture!
In return, I will pet you, shower you with attention and let you lick my face.

My Interests

ROCKIN' OUT!
WRESTLING CHAIRS
(INTERESTS I DON'T HAVE PICTURES FOR.)
Playing bass/guitars, writing songs, music in general, good movies, cars, parties, beaches/beers, interesting conversations, working out, meeting people, Bonefish Grill, hot tubs and warm swimming pools after hours . Girls. I like really trashy nasty girls but even if you are just a super hott normal girl that wants to chill we can probably still work that out. (just kidding about the really trashy nasty girls - they need not apply.)

EATING FOOD!
ROBBING THE BANK!

I'd like to meet:

Two Face!

"Shakira, Shakira."

Petra.

You! Especially if you actually look like this!

and finally...

Towering Inferno.


(They're great.)

Music:

These guys,Along with, +100GB Give or take.
...and on the 6th day God created Towering Inferno.

Movies:

For a movie to make the list it usually either has something to do with soldiers or gangsters and usually does not have an emotional woman ruining shit. There are a very few notable exceptions. I am not a cold hearted monster.
Ok some movies on my shelf plus whatever comes to mind at the moment:
Gladiator
Requiem for a Dream
Godfather Duology (3 guesses to figure out which one didn't make the cut...I hope you don't fuck this up
Goodfellas
Scarface
Saving Private Ryan
Shindler's List
The Pianist
Blackhawk Down
Tigerland
A Mighty Wind
City of God
Hotel Rwanda
Blow
Enemy at the Gates
Memento
Snatch
Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels
JFK
Boiler Room
American Physco
Braveheart
Monty Python's Quest for the Holy Grail
Milo and Otis (for real, bitch!)
A Scanner Darkly
Dawn of the Dead and stuff like that
etc.

Television:


Heroes:

But it's kind of like that xbox game "Fable" where a hero can be evil.

My Blog

Bar Story

So this old man came up to my bar yesterday and asked for a Tanqueray Martini straight up with an olive. I knew he was going to be trouble the second I saw him. Something about his disheveled appearan...
Posted by he ain't shit on Mon, 25 Sep 2006 07:20:00 PST

Story of my life

Ok, read the blog about the car then replace the word "car" with "girlfriend" then replace any reference to a car part with either food, jewelry, clothes, trips to wherever, "anything she ever wanted,...
Posted by he ain't shit on Sat, 23 Sep 2006 01:06:00 PST

I worry that she let's other men drive her.

So I bought my Integra like 2 or 3 years ago and it was basically love at first sight. She was fast and smooth and she had a nice big hatch for all my equipment. And she didn't give me no lip. I used ...
Posted by he ain't shit on Sat, 23 Sep 2006 01:00:00 PST

Sugar mama?

So I'm now a bartender at an Applebee's in northern Fulton County, Georgia. A lot of rich people live here because its a suburb of Atlanta which gets them just barely far enough away from the bad area...
Posted by he ain't shit on Tue, 05 Sep 2006 11:35:00 PST

New Plans

January 2007 New Years resolution: Move to Gainesville, Florida with (at least) two of my best friends and bandmates and have the time of my life. Finish up my AA degree in one semester then transfer ...
Posted by he ain't shit on Tue, 05 Sep 2006 11:21:00 PST