JESSUCKAAAA!

Sometimes in the morning I am petrified and can't move, awake but cannot open my eyes. And the weight is crashing down on my lungs, I know I can't breathe and hope someone will save me this time.And your mothers's still calling you, insane and high. swearing it's different this time, And you tell her to give into the demons that possess her, that god never blessed her insides. And you hang up the phone and feel badly for upsetting things, crawl back into bed to dream of a time when your heart was open wide and you loved things just because, like the sick and the dying.And sometimes when you're on, you're really fuckin on, and your friends they sing along and they love you. But the lows are so extreme that the good seems fuckin cheap, and it teases you for weeks in it's absence. But you'll fight it and you'll make it through. You'll fake it if you have to and you'll show up for work with a smile. You'll be better and you'll be smarter, and more grown up and a better daughter or son and a REAL good friend. You'll be awake, you'll be alert, you'll be positive though it hurts, and you'll laugh and embrace all your friends. You'll be a real good listener. You'll be honest you'll be brave. You'll be handsome and youll be beautiful.You'll be happy.