Dayna

dayna smith is one of the most influential people of this age. donned in corsets and floral prints, she makes her way to and from her place of work, wherein she is the vice president of sales of a major retail corporation. in her free time, she keeps busy by trying to break the world record for consecutive ringers in one game of horseshoes and working on the final touches of her time machine. dayna loves gnomes, rainbow colored coffee mugs, and bob seger. but don't let dayna's commonplace appearance fool you. she could kill you in an instant with her lisa frank box cutter if provoked. dayna smith is a legend. if you ever asked dayna to tell her story, one could assume she might say," I had a dream Hitler was time traveling in space, coming to destroy our future utopia and infect us with zombie disease." Greatest idea ever for retailers every where: lifetime coupons, which would be tattooed on the customers forearm for all eternity for the simple price of their dignity. Never again will little sales girls have to deal with whining clients about forgotten coupons, instead just suggest the ultimate alternative. Now you'll know who your true customers really are.