ATTENTION BANDS/MUSICIANS:
If you want me to check out your music, DO NOT SEND A MESSAGE OR FRIEND REQUEST TO THIS PROFILE. Send it to this one . It's much easier for me to keep track of shit that way. I'm more than willing to give your shit a spin if you shoot a message or friend request to that account, but anything that goes to this account will be DOA, I promise you.
My name is Ryan. I'm a reformed juvenile sexual offender, and I would love to strike up a relationship with your daughter or younger sister. Or maybe even you, as long as you're under the age of 18 and/or not a law enforcement officer. For contact information and pictures of my penis, feel free to message me. We can trade!
Sarcastic . Sardonic . Cynical . Intelligent . Impassioned . Affectionate . Loyal . Good-natured . Good-humoured . Well-intentioned . Well-endowed
And then some...
I've been a vegetarian for about eight years. Just my opinion. I don't force my beliefs on others, if for no other reason than it being a horrendous waste of my valuable time to try and enlighten you murderers. Do what you will, and I'll do what I will. I just won't be spending my eternity in Hell for destroying God's beautiful creatures. You sinners.
Random Fact Sheet:
- I'm heavily motivated and inspired by creativity. Music, Art and Literature cause me to be. I'm intrigued by theology and religious discussion, but I don't forsee myself ever believing in God again. You're welcome to try though. I'm violently against sexism, homophobia and racism, with the obvious exception of the Amish. Those pious assholes deserve whatever is coming to them. I'm open-minded enough to listen to your opinions and worldviews all the way through before deconstructing them and showing you why you're wrong. I'm not much into beer, but whenever I drink, I always kick off the night with a Vodka/Sprite. Or afternoon, as the case may be. I am a GOD to the homeless people of London, Ontario. I cannot wait to be old so I can finally put action to all the ethically questionable shit in my head, and blame it on senility. My greatest goal in life is to be engaged in a high-speed car chase... while driving a stolen police vehicle. My favorite place in this world is on my couch, eating pasta, and watching It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia. I love to travel and am making it a personal goal to visit every single US State/Territory and every single country at least once before I die. I give tremendous hugs. Anyone that I truly consider a "friend" is as good as blood. I don't sever ties very easily, unless absolutely necessary. I genuinely enjoy NSync's album "No Strings Attached". Fuck you. I survive on far less sleep than any normal person should. I've recently discovered that I am not in fact, superhuman. I'm just a regular guy with a retarded sleep schedule. When I was younger, I used to have nightmares because of Freddy Krueger. Now, I have nightmares because of 1 Night In Chyna. I'm the only person that I know, that's been able to figure out an international calling card while black-out drunk. Apparantly, I used it to call my mom at 4am from Ontario. If you were born in and/or were raised in and/or currently live in the city of Houston, TX I want nothing to do with you. Seriously. Die. Unless you work at Jack In The Box or you oversee highway construction for the city. Then triple-die. Half of what I say is delivered with a sarcastic bullet. The other half is straight-out bullshit.
This is what I've been rocking to this week. This is what makes me whole.
Most recently played tracks:
As God as my witness, these guys will own the world shortly. Give it a little bit of time America; pretty soon, they'll have you by the balls. Or at least Kevin will. I think that's how he likes it.