I'd like to meet:
cleaver
Music:
classic rock, mostly from the 60's & 70's, also mostly British, these are not requirements, but nobody's perfect. almost all music that has been released since the creation of the music video sucks, there are some exceptions but not nearly enough
Movies:
comedies, or any movie that has a decent plot line
Television:
any show with fake laughter or lights telling the audience how to react should cause the producers, actors and supporters to be shot, several times
Books:
The Dictionary
Heroes:
Alexander the Great, Archimedes, Aristotle, George Carlin, Julius Ceaser, Steven Colbert, Rodney Dangerfield, Euler, Guy Fawkes, Benjamin Franklin, Che Guevara, Mitch Hedberg, Heron of Alexandria, Leonidas, Tom Mabe, Maddox, Steve Martin, Karl Marx, Carlos Mecia, Plato, Pythagoras, Socrates, Sun Tzu, William Wallace, Steven Wright, Frank Zappa