My name is Jon. Some people know me as different things, which I allow. But my name is Jon, so that's just fine to call me.
I am never content with life. But I still love living. I embrace reality, even though it's often painful, because it makes life feel authentic. I don't like feeling like my life is a show. I like to really live. I don't hide from pain or things that are uncomfortable because there's nothing scary about them when you realize that they are a part of what makes life wonderful. I don't try to get over sadness when I'm sad because I know I will eventually get over it without pretending to be happy. And real happiness is much better.
My emotions make my life. When I care about something, I love it. When I care about someone, I love them. When life is right I notice everyone. I dislike a lot of what people do because people often do things that aren't really them. This includes me. This is most of humanity. I don't like it, but I'm a part of it. I don't like people who don't accept kindness or innocence. I try to be the catcher in the rye. But eventually I look back at myself and realize I'm a phony, too.
Speaking of love, I love love. But I don't know much about it. No one really does. I've thought I did many times. I was convinced many times. But I didn't. Every day my opinion on love changes. That goes for everyone. And everyone has a different perception on what love is. Love is a feeling. Feelings are different for everyone. You might not agree with the reasoning behind certain loves, but love isn't about reason. Love happens. It's beautiful and ugly. It makes people happy and sad. It's a mystery that cannot truly be explained. It's something I care a lot about.
I try not to get stressed out over petty things. It's not accepted to do this in society often times. I don't care about what college I go to. I don't believe my GPA means anything to anyone but the people who want to watch teenagers claw at each other to achieve some kind of phony satisfaction with their lives and then one day realize that it means nothing. I don't like rushing through life. Because when you rush, life just... happens. It's not lived, it occurs. That's not really living. Sometimes it takes a car accident to realize this, but maybe you should just listen to Ferris Bueller.
I don't like preaching and I don't like being preached to. This is just here because it is. I'm not trying to change the world or anyone reading it. I'm just expressing something about myself. If you don't like it, that's fine. Everyone takes things differently. After all, many people hated Spider-man 3, but I felt it was one of the most touching movies of the year. That's life.
That's all.
AIM screenname: onefootedsmurf
www.myspace.com/oldwhiteman
