Moogleson The Grand - ProfilesArchive

About Me

3 eyes of newt, 2 feathers of quail, 1 heart of gecko, to the Terrestrial Goddess I hail. Blood of pigeon, mane of lion, claws of raven, catch Orion. By the moon on winter's night, the King and Queen will unite! Corndogs? Corn dogs? I was once known as very fertile. I was once known as very ripe. If you try to test my instincts I will have to dark you. I'm the type of guy who drives a hard bargain. And that ain't no fuckin joke. My maid thinks I'm swell. I think she's really neat herself. I refuse to walk through puddles of mud. One guy tried to take me through one and I shortened his left forearm. If you cross me or stab me in the back I will go behind a tree and whimper. My gymnastics coach said I'm the best at handstands. And that ain't no fuckin joke either. I can stand with the best of them. I like to think of myself as very friendly but all you mothercockdickbitches must remember that I know 17 different spells to dark you!!

My Interests

Invoking the spirit of Osiris. Hot air baloons, Ice cream socials, green pastures, the smell of boiling water, the french language, ol' pop bottles, ceramic snow babies, upkept lawns, feather dusters, Cole Wynn, Arch Duke Ferdinand, doll houses, wands, devil sticks, wind socks, pinwheels, dracula, sand art, 7, floral arrangements, art deco, women of the Renaissance, poachers, and baby seals.

I'd like to meet:

old people with broken hips, Midgets, John Tesh, elderly amputees, winter princesses, three horns and long necks, white dudes with doo rags.

Music:

ZACK ATTACK

Movies:

Mean girls, loser, fried green tomatoes, how stella got her groove back, Notting Hill, Debbie Does Dallas, Gummo, Pink Flamingo, Julian Donkeyboy

Television:

My Three Sons, Patty Duke, Viking Quest, Golden Girls, Fox News, Reading Rainbow

Books:

Jorge Curioso, everybody poops, the gas we pass, tortilla surprise, the art of the male figure, lust in louisiana, how to win friends and influence people, how to learn the amazing "venus butterfly" technique, 10 ways to empowerment

Heroes:

Michael Nott, Michael J. Fox, Michael Jackson, Michael Maclamore, Michael Tyson, Michael Madson, Michael Moore, Michael Savage, Michael Jordan, Michael Stipe, Michael Bolton, Michael D, Michael Gordon, Michael Jones, Michael Sammons, Raton Miguelito, and Jordan Catalano.