I CAME CLOSE TO HAVING A LEGITIMATE ACTIVITY WHEN I FELL SICK FOR A WEEK AND WAS FORCED TO BUILD MODEL AIRPLANES TO PASS THE TIME. BUT THEN I GOT BETTER AND REALIZED THAT, ABSENT SOME DEBILITATIING ILLNESS, ANYONE WHO BUILDS MODEL AIRPLANES IN HIS SPARE TIME MIGHT AS WELL CLIMB A CLOCKTOWER SOMEWHERE AND THROW HIMSELF OFF... EARN MY TRUST AND YOU WILL HAVE A FRIEND FOR LIFE. I CAN EITHER BE YOUR BEST FRIEND OR WORST ENEMY. I'LL LEAVE THAT DECISION UP TO YOU. MOST PEOPLE LIKE TO MAKE FRIENDS WITH AS MANY PEOPLE AS POSSIBLE. I LIKE TO MAKE FRIENDS WITH PEOPLE I CAN TRUST WITH MY LIFE. I CAME HOME AFTER SERVING 4 YEARS ON ACTIVE DUTY IN THE MARINE CORPS. I'M IN THE RESERVES NOW SO I'M JUST TRYING TO GET BACK IN TO A NORMAL LIFE.... I'M A BLUE COLLAR TYPE I LIKE WORKING WITH MY HANDS. I'VE BEEN A METS FAN ALL MY LIFE SEEIN AS HOW I'M FROM FLUSHING. MY NATIONALITY IS HALF HUNGARIAN AND HALF PALESTINIAN I'M A PRETTY STRANGE COMBINATION. I HAVE YET TO MEET ANY ONE WHO COULD GUESS WHAT I WAS...The scale:
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: No redeeming qualities. This girl is ugly, usually fat, boring and sucks in just about everyway possible. If you don't know a common-stock pig when you see one, you are destined to spend the rest of your life with one.
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: One redeeming quality, like large breasts, nice ass, cute face, great dick-sucking lips, etc. If you concentrate on that one redeeming physical quality, and you get shit-housed, you're not too upset with yourself waking up next to a respectable pig. Of course, you still make her crawl out the window when she leaves, because you don't want your friends to see her, but at least you don't want to gargle bleach and scrub yourself like a rape victim after she leaves.
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Acceptable to be seen with in public. She is average when sober, but looks MUCH better after only about three beers. You'll admit to your friends that you're fucking her, but you still make fun of her behind her back, and tell them lies about her sexual prowess and bi-sexual tendencies to justify your dealings with her. She's not bad overall, and will do if nothing better comes along, but could be left in a heartbeat if the opportunity for a hot chick comes along. Sadly, most guys end up having to settle for a 3-star, as these are the most prevalent type of women.
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: This is the girl that is very attractive, but not super hot. You will be seen with her in public at any point in the day, even before drinking. You think twice before ditching this girl for a hot chick, especially if she has special powers (tongue ring, double jointed, etc.). Ascension to the 4-star level can only be attained through use of a petition. The candidate must secure 75% of the vote from those polled. (NOTE: Bonus points only make a candidate petition eligible. She still must garner 75% of the vote)
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This is the hot chick. Hopefully no further explanation is necessary. It's kind of like the Hall of Fame. VERY FEW WOMEN ARE 5-STARS, about 5-10% of the population. A declaration that someone is hot is assumed to be true, but can be rebuked if 25% of those polled vote against her 5-star placement.
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The lowest of the low. A 1-star (common-stock pig) with a terrible personality qualifies as a Wildebeast. They should all be put to sleep. This is that loud, disgusting fat girl in the bar that smokes, orders complicated drinks and then spills them on everyone, and is generally just so annoying that you have to actively restrain yourself from kicking her in the crotch and stomping on her throat until she drowns on her own blood. There is no insult too mean or crude for her, and basic human rights do not apply to her.
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Number One
CONFORMITY IS THE JAILOR OF FREEDOM AND THE ENEMY OF GROWTH. -JOHN F KENNEDY.
Number Two
THOSE WHO AIM AT GREAT DEEDS MUST ALSO SUFFER GREATLY. -PLUTACH.
Number Three
SHOW ME A GUY WHO HAS FEELINGS, AND ILL SHOW YOU A SUCKER. -FRANK SINATRA.
Number Four
GOD GIVES EVERY BIRD HIS WORM, BUT HE DOES NOT THROW IT INTO THE NEST. -P.D JAMES
Number Five
BUT I, BEING POOR... HAVE ONLY MY DREAMS. I HAVE SPREAD MY DREAMS UNDER YOUR FEET. TREAD SOFTLY... BECAUSE YOU TREAD ON MY DREAMS. -???
Number Six
THE ONLY MEN FIT TO LIVE ARE THOSE MEN WHO ARE NOT AFRAID TO DIE-???MAY-
STUBBORN AND HARD-HEARTED. STRONG-WILLED AND HIGHLY MOTIVATED. SHARP THOUGHTS. EASILY ANGERED. ATTRACTS OTHERS AND LOVES ATTENTION. DEEP FEELINGS. BEAUTIFUL PHYSICALLY AND MENTALLY. FIRM STANDPOINT. NEEDS NO MOTIVATION. EASILY CONSOLED. SYSTEMATIC (LEFT BRAIN). LOVES TO DREAM. STRONG CLAIRVOYANCE. UNDERSTANDING. GOOD IMAGINATION. GOOD PHYSICAL. WEAK BREATHING. LOVES LITERATURE AND THE ARTS. LOVES TRAVELING. DISLIKE BEING AT HOME. RESTLESS.NOT HAVING MANY CHILDREN. HARDWORKING. HIGH SPIRITED. SPENDTHRIFT.
