-Music -DVD Piracy -1970's Motorcycles and a few early '80s -Film (Not movies!!! FILM!!) -Foreign Currency Exchange -Using buzzwords as a pretension of knowledge...e.g. Greenspan, Proposition 72, Telomeres, and porn terms like DP or ATP and creampies.
I could use more riding buds. Preferably ones with tools I can't afford. In the romance department, I'm happily married, but flirt with me so I can feel like I still have some appeal, I won't flirt back, but I'll be nice...I'm desperately trying to get back into my music so jazz musicians, hit me up...1.2.3.4.5...heh heh...jazz joke..Also anyone who has an absolute psychotic hatred for any or all of the following companies: AOL, APPLE, KIA, HARLEY-DAVIDSON (or at least their asshole riders, some are cool i guess...), Any company that uses SPAM as a marketing method, AOL-Because they deserve to be hated even more, SIT AND SLEEP/ROBBINS BROTHERS/AL GREENWOOD'S BEDSPREAD KINGDOM/CRAZY GIDEON/THE GENERAL AUTO INSURANCE--you probably already know why...And if not them, at least their fucking advertising agencies.
Whatever Jack plays. and Jack plays whatever they want...(Secretly, don't tell anyone this, I don't want anybody knowing but uhh... I like Styx...)I want to be the first Elvis impersonator...(that's Costello) and nothing beats the jazz giants, but a few classical guys (Liszt, Wolfie, Paganini,) come close...I love you Cab Calloway! I'm writing this on the 11th anniversary of your death :( I hate karaoke, but i'm good at it and host it Fridays at the Prospector sometimes...
ooooohhhh...don't get me started about movies...here's my reader's digest condensed version of opinion on movies...Hollywood, you've been sucking since somewhere around the early 80's...I've switched to watching primarily Indies and Foreign....Same goes for you San Fernando Valley, you haven't put out any good porn since about '88....shame on you both!!! I'll be hanging out at the Indie, Foreign, Documentary, Anime, and Spirit Award winners sections of NETFLIX!!!!
pull the plug...plug it back in for half an hour while "Family Guy" is on...then unplug it again...I miss you Tiny toons, Babs Bunny, I want make love to your 2-D form over and over again!! Why hasn't anyone killed Geraldo yet??
Te Tao Ching, Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance, Ancient Art of War, Letters from a Nut, California Drivers Handbook --DON'T WAIT FOR THE MOVIE!!, TV Guide (circa 1977-79), Books on tapeworm...Book of Life (They don't really let me see that one...) The Joy of Cooking, The Joy of Sex, The Joy of Cooking while Having Sex, The great pamphlet that came with my penis enlarger pump which somehow still discriminates against Filipinos, the Santa Cruz Operations UNIX operating system manual volumes 1 through 376, Reading Books for Dummies, Fish Identification Guide, and, of course, See Dick Run (my first publications about STDs)....
Socrates, he died for my ability to think a few centuries before Chist died for my sins...The band "Better than Ezra", for giving me the insight on how I DON'T WANT TO SOUND LIKE...as a matter of fact, my new band will be called "Better than Better than Ezra"... Rosa Parks, thanks hon...I bet they still made you ride in the back of the hearse, though...Ghandi, quite possibly the most brilliant misogynist ever...NASA, without you, I wouldn't have TANG and the ballpoint pen...Superheroes: Aquaman, thank you for gathering fish, I'm filipino...Wonderwoman, It's for you why I joined the Navy (that, and i THOUGHT i was going to sing sea shanties in a huge chorus while happily scrubbing the decks) The Wondertwins, without you, who was gonna watch the all important Justice League while the others were busy doing real work? You can't use a temp agency for that you know....Bette Midler, Did you ever know that you're my hero, and everything I would like to be? ... for you are the wind beneath my sheets....