Da SailorMon

Hey there!
Buenos Dias . . good morning, or afternoon, or evening
whatever. . .
Que tal?
Here's the short story . . .
I gotta be honest and tell ya'll,
that unless you're a boat bum, or a beach bum,
a U.S. Marine, a cultural anthropologist,
a lover of good books, good booze, sailboats, and fast cars,
blues guitar, animals,and sexy ladies,
or you are just a happy soul with hair half way down your back
and legs up to your armpits
who is also intelligent
You may not be in the right place afterall . . .
And (PAY ATTENTION HERE). . . you are probably not looking for me
And for my religious and political friends . . . I’ve decided to add that I am not a Christian, a Jew, a Muslim, a Hindu, a Buddhist, a Republican, or a Democrat. Nor am I a Conservative or a Liberal, but merely a simple man who tries to think for himself. That usually will translate to the fact that in most cases we can find something on these levels to disagree about if we try a little. LOL
And now for the back story . . .
Impertinent details follow:
Okay okay . . I have been asked for particulars. Being somewhat of a secretive sort I hesitate, for this strikes me as being very much akin to going to a damn AA meeting, or one of those group therapy sessions where people tell everyone what really wonderful twerps they are and then gets hugs from all the other really wonderful twerps . . . not that I know anything about this sort of thing. Then again, maybe it is going to feel more like going to confession. Wow, ya think? I've always admired this process. Kind of like getting a bus transfer. It's free and you get to go where you want to go. Neat huh?
Anyway, here ya go . . . a few off the top like a blah blah stream of consciousness . . .
I have been known to ride horses and whores will flair and abandon, and I got the bruises to prove it. Oh yeah! Ha!
Hey! That was a good beginning, right?
I'm a happy soul and I wake up ever morning that way . . . always have. (Near death times, suffering from painful hangovers don't count) I'm an expert shot with a rifle and a pistol. (got the medals to prove it) I hate jungles and don't like New York or Chicago all that much either. I think it's a language/image problem. (people there are so damn civilized) I do like kids and animals though. Usually it's instant bonding. Hand me a crying baby and nine times out of ten both the baby and I will fall asleep in minutes. (I have no idea why that happens) I'm a good cook, more or less well traveled, more or less educated, and can hold my own at black tie, sit down dinners and cocktail parties, although admittedly these have always been a bit of a strain. (basically some people really bore me and often they're the kind of people you meet at functions like this. But the food is usually free and I don't have to do the dishes) I meditate and consider myself spiritual. I also learn from my mistakes, or at least I try. (I've got a long list to refer to around here somewhere, but always seem to have trouble finding it) I can laugh at myself, and often do, even without help or encouragement. What's more I enjoy making others smile and laugh. I believe laughter is the paramount positive human characteristic, which belies my anthropological training, but I'm sticking to it. (No I won't debate this) I've carried crickets and spiders outside to free them, and I've planted trees with the express idea of eventually sitting under them. (Makes sense to me) I like animals, but I don't like snakes. Did I mention I don't like jungles? I'm a good friend and a bad enemy. (I allow people to take their pick) I have worked on a dude ranch, been dead broke, driven 18 wheelers across country, (Ca to NYC and back) taught dancing, sold jewelry, clothes, and even encyclopedias, broken a few bones, been dead broke several more times, worn a tie, played the corporate management game, owned a couple of businesses, and done quite a few things I shouldn't have. (I've gotten away with most of it) Yes, I inhaled. I'm a Sagittarian, with Gemini rising, a Tiger according to the Chinese, and a bastard according to an ex-wife. (All of which probably explains something) I'm a superior procrastinator and can sit doing nothing better than anyone I know. (Such skill takes years of practice I want ya should know) My favorite places to be are on a boat, on a beach, in the mountains or desert, or on a bar stool. (I should probably confess I've never made love on a bar stool . . . yeah it's true, honest)
Enough already. Confessions are as exhausting to make as they are to read, although I will point out, if you really read all this, it's your own fault.
LOL
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Damn! That fits!
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