tony

Contrary to what you may have read I was born in the year 4AD in the month you would now call March.I lived a quiet simple life with my parents until one day in my early teens a voice told me I was put on earth for a reason,and that reason was to spread the word of love as explained to me by Himself (my old man) and put people on the right track toward an eternity of bliss.I learnt a few tricks and had a particularly high IQ in comparison with the folk around me,and armed with the ideals my father had pressed on me I began spreading the word you now know as "the word of God"With my friends I gathered quite a following and just as it was all about to come to fruition I was told (again by pa) that I had to leave this place and let mankind finish the journey themselves.So an elaborate story was hatched and that is what you call "the crucifixion" during which I died,apparently for your sins.That didn't actually happen.The bit on the mount where I descended to heaven?? That DID happen.In the intevening 2000ish years I've kept busy.A lot of paperwork,I try to watch the football when I've time,keeping the Morning Star at bay....all stuff you would expect from the Son of Man.Now though,I am back,I have a good deal set up with Microsoft and Nike and HBO will be making six feature length docs capturing the Second Coming from the beginning right down to the apocolypse (I know how it ends but won't spoil it) HBO didn't have the foresight to realize that regardless of the outcome no one will be around to watch the show but...hey...they're the experts right??So join me now fellow man and woman as we go forth into the beginning of the end.Have your tickets ready.