Kirk profile picture

Kirk

Desire is both our Existence and our Curse...

About Me

Favorite Quote:

"You disbelieve in Ghosts and God - because you have not seen them? What! You have never seen the mocking ghosts of your beliefs?- the Laughing Bedlam of your humility or Mammon - your grotesque Ideas of "self"? Yeah, your most courageous Lies are Gods! Who is the Slayer of your Gods - but a God!" ~ Austin Osman Spare

Dreams in Life :

Just wanted to say hi to all my Myspace friends!!! ^_^ Hehe, well lets see I haven't really done anything spectacular yet in my life but I have set goals for it in the future, haha.

My dream goal or job in life is to own successful clubs and theatres and to revive the occult/spiritualism in modern society. I find my influences evolve around the "original" Order of the Golden Dawn and how they performed some of their esoteric rituals through theatre performances. I also find inspiration through adapts like Austin Osman Spare who opened new ideas within the occult community by blending occult spirituality with art.

I hope to someday to heighten the status of spirituality in this world some day and to bring back old teachings, and help bring about more unbelievable adapts like Aleister Crowley, Austin Spare, Andrew Chumbley, Kenneth Grant, etc. as we need more adapts like them in this world.

This is what I feel I was put in this world to do and because it is my dream I will put my whole being into making this happen! ^_^

I know, its pretty weird for a child to want this but I always wanted to revive spirituality or at least spiritual thinking; to make people realize that they are spiritual creatures and not some social/religious sheep.

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TELL ME ABOUT YOURSELF - The Survey
Name: Kirk (Not telling my last) :P
Birthday: September 26, 1988 (I'm born in the year of the dragon.) :D
Birthplace: Hawaii and all over the place
Current Location: It won't be so current when this year is up.
Eye Color: Beautiful Brown Eyes
Hair Color: Black
Height: 5'8", but I'm still growing, lol
Right Handed or Left Handed: Right Handed, but I try using my left
Your Heritage: My blood is this world's blood, my race is the mixture of other people's race, but if any you can say Inca is my family's origin
The Shoes You Wore Today: What shoes, I like to go barefoot. I like the feel of the grass between my toes.
Your Weakness: Wouldn't you like to know
Your Fears: You don't need to know that...
Your Perfect Pizza: Hmm, I don't really eat pizza all that much...
Goal You Would Like To Achieve This Year: Ohh, I know; not killing myself in this stupid state
Your Most Overused Phrase On an instant messenger: If anything, I just say bye
Thoughts First Waking Up: Ahh, damn not again
Your Best Physical Feature: My eyes
Your Bedtime: Its hard for me to sleep, but I usually just go whenever
Your Most Missed Memory: I don't have any missed memory, I have a pretty bad memory block
Pepsi or Coke: I can't really tell the difference...
MacDonalds or Burger King: I don't like MacDonalds or Burger King, but I guess I'll go with Burger King
Single or Group Dates: Single, I think group dates are weird
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Umm, I guess both...
Chocolate or Vanilla: Vanilla, to much chocolate makes me sick. :(
Cappuccino or Coffee: Both :)
Do you Smoke: Now, no
Do you Swear: I'm trying to stop, but people keep pissing me off. :(
Do you Sing: Privatley, not even my most closest friend has heard me sing, and I'll keep it at that.
Do you Shower Daily: Of course!
Have you Been in Love: That's funny, I don't believe in love
Do you want to go to College: I don't know, I just want to leave...
Do you want to get Married: Also don't know...
Do you belive in yourself: Sometimes, but people keep hurting me
Do you get Motion Sickness: Lol, of course not. :D
Do you think you are Attractive: I'm whatever you want me to be... ;)
Are you a Health Freak: Somewhat, but I don't think I'm a health freak, I just eat healthy
Do you get along with your Parents: Sometimes...
Do you like Thunderstorms: Yes, thunderstorms are like voices from the heavens whispering for me to come out side.
Do you play an Instrument: No, not yet
In the past month have you Drank Alcohol: yeah, I need to slow down
In the past month have you Smoked: nope, or maybe???
In the past month have you been on Drugs: yep, but it was for astral work
In the past month have you gone on a Date: No, and I'm glad because I always end up dating the wrong type of person, you know the girl who looks all pretty and then after awhile she seems to go crazy.
In the past month have you gone to a Mall: Yep, and my money is all gone :(
In the past month have you eaten a box of Oreos: No, but I'm wanting some right now.
In the past month have you eaten Sushi: Yep, I love sushi and seafood
In the past month have you been on Stage: No, I get stage fright so easily... :P
In the past month have you been Dumped: Ha no, I do the dumping
In the past month have you gone Skinny Dipping: Ahh no, but thinking about it some day.
In the past month have you Stolen Anything: Yes, your heart, I'm just that sneaky
Ever been Drunk: Yeah, so many times, I need to
Ever been called a Tease: yeah
Ever been Beaten up: Lol, no
Ever Shoplifted: Only when I feel bored and just want to stick it to the man.
How do you want to Die: Oh, I want to die in a glorious way.
What do you want to be when you Grow Up: I want to be happy
What country would you most like to Visit: I'll like to see Egypt or Italy
In a Boy/Girl..
Favourite Eye Color: Jade Green, but it doesn't matter; Your expression and emotion that comes from your eyes is all that means something.
Favourite Hair Color: Black, but I don't really care
Short or Long Hair: It doesn't matter
Height: A littler smaller than me or I'm okay if a little taller, haha
Weight: Average
Best Clothing Style: Something exotic/alluring
Number of Drugs I have taken: Hmm, trying to remember
Number of CDs I own: A lot
Number of Piercings: Zero
Number of Tattoos: Ohh, I'm planning on having one soon, its going to look beautiful on my back
Number of things in my Past I Regret: Some, but we can't change whatever has happened in the past, you're just going to have to deal with it day by day.
CREATE YOUR OWN! - or - GET PAID TO TAKE SURVEYS!
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My Interests


Likes :
- Occult Antiquity
- Books (On various subjects)
- Theology
- Philosophy
- Electronics & Gadgets
- Internet
- Music (anything that's good)
- Movies (Drama, Action, Horror, Mystery, Comedy)
- Nice People ^_^
- Food (Especially Thai Food)
- Traveling
- Money
- Clothes (CyberDog, Godemperor23, Sean John, etc.)
- Animals
- Health Foods
- Raves
- Night Clubs
- Myspace

Dislikes :
- Hammond High School
- Beats (the vegetable)
- Most punk bands on MTV
- Reality shows with stupid people in them
- Ignorant people/Stupid people
- Greasy Foods
- People who mistreat animals
- Awkward Conversations

Meg's Poem :

Ashes Ashes
Rust to rust
A thorn I thrust
Inside you
I ruin and despise
Everything beautiful
You are inside

The music of crushing bones
Breaking teeth
Symphony of the taste you left behind
Breaking away

This resurection of mine
Cursed
Blood black evil
Naked china bone white
Tangled in knives
A prison cell within
Everytime I touch you
Slicing a little bit deeper

The distance that has become alive
Dies
I echo the sound of panic thickening in the night air
I repair
Stitching petals of innocence
Pink tender glaze
A delicacy within

Heavens only tears
Quietly draining, I feed
Waiting for the hum to subside
I watch you bleed.

Jezebel.2005

This poem is from a caring friend of mine; beautiful inside and out. My youthful heart will always remain close to the beautiful words of my Jezebel.
Will always remain in love with this woman's heart... ~ Kirk

Poem by Meg :

Wandering clouds circle her
waiting for the night to reflect in her eyes
home is in the darkness of her midnight
her pupils dilate
her voice crackles in the cold
stinging her tongue
gray gray sky....why do you follow me tonight?
she remembers every wish he has forgotten
the sky replies
look beyond the sea of sleeping minds
past the crescent moon of howling wolves
see the flowers of a thousand hearts bloom
it seems to be raining as far as she can see
not a crack of light glowing
upon the thunderous seas
she hears a song deep within
it is the voice of the sun
he sings so clear
:::open your eyes little one:::
she inhales the dreams of sunsets past
she sings with him radiantly
remembering his song
together they banish the night
from the shadows
she is reborn.

"If you cannot understand this primal script of magick - swallow the whole damn book: then you will obtain astonishing results." Austin Osman Spare

"...there are beings of intelligence and power of a far higher quality than anything we can conceive of as human; that they are not necessarily based on the cerebral and nervous structures that we know, and that the one and only chance for mankind to advance as a whole is for individuals to make contact with such Beings."~ Aleister Crowley

I'd like to meet:

OccultForums/Myspace

- Lady Hydralisk (Naomi)
- Tengu (Greg)
- Rin Daemoko (Ryan)
- Meg (Myspace)
- Laura (Myspace)
- Elizabeth (Myspace)
- Ashnook
- Whimsy
- Lynne
- Nanamin

But, I would like to see all my myspace friends!!!

Cain and Abel: Oil on canvas, 198 x 147 cm Galleria Nazionale d'Arte Antica, Rome

Music:

My favorite bands and artists are :

    Fields of the Nephilim Psychonaut 75 Black Funeral Mos Def DJ Honda The Roots Pink Floyd The Cult Blue Oyster Cult KHZ Grendel Analog Missionary Nine Inch Nails Ladytron Depeche Mode Skinny Puppy Hocico Suicide Commando Conjure One Decoded Feedback The Cure Cocteau Twins Seer Dismantled Razed In Black Violent Entity Karma Bomb The Azoic LunarClick Black Sabbath Paul Oakenfold Ilion Conflict Level 2.0 Nirvana Eric Clapton CombiChrist Debris Common Kanye West Fleetwood Mac Mary Gauthier Tactical Sekt Nas Satyr Gackt KMFDM Dawn of Ashes Carly Simon Johnny Cash Robert Johnson Garten Der Asche Supreme Court Sade Shakira Santana Project 12:01 Brandi Winks Minga Morisson Poe Korn Lil John Notorious B.I.G Bob Marley Wynonie Harris Ma Rainey Psyclon Nine Morrissey TupacMary J. Blige Missy Elliot Beyonce 36 MafiaVastSting Al Stewart

These are a few artists that I like but I enjoy many different bands in various genres. ^_^

Movies:



Badlands 1973 (An old favorite)Terrence Malick's startlingly accomplished debut feature was inspired by the Charles Starkweather and Caril-Ann Fugate murders of the late-1950s. Martin Sheen plays Kit, a 25-year-old trash man who walks with a James Dean swagger. When he first meets the innocent 15-year-old Holly (Sissy Spacek), he falls head over heels in love with her. Her father (Warren Oates), an overprotective widower, will not allow the relationship to blossom, even after Kit informs him of his decent intentions. This refusal sparks Kit into action, triggering a brutal killing spree across the Midwest. All the while, Holly is there by Kit's side, to witness the senseless crimes and ponder her uncertain future.

OLD BOY

Television:



What's better than to watch a television show that goes into the view of psychology and the perversion of beauty. ^_^

Books:



Of course Lives of the Mayfair Witches are one of my top favorite books ever.

Desert Sin: "Desert Sin's objective is to weave narratives through movement while embracing the beautiful & grotesque within ourselves, drawing every witness deep into the spectacle of the worlds we reveal." ~ Philosophy of Sin

Heroes:

Narcissus was the son of the river god Cephisus and the nymph Liriope . When Narcissus was born, Tiresias (a seer ) was asked if the child would live a long life. Tiresias replied "If he never knows himself".

As a handsome youth he left a trail of broken hearts from rejected lovers of both sexes. Narcissus wanted nothing to do with falling in love from anyone and rebuffed all attempts at romance.

His cruelty to Echo was not the only instance. Finally, the nymphs offered a prayer that he might feel what it was to love and meet no return of affection.

"So may he himself love, and not gain the thing he loves"

Narcissus, upon finding an image of himself in a pool then fell in love with himself and, not being able to find consolation, he died of thirst at the pool, for if Narcissus had reached to take a drink, he would have shattered his own image into thousands of pieces.

It is said that Narcissus still keeps gazing on his image in the waters of the river Styx . [4]

An alternate story claims that it is silly for a man to fall in love with his own reflection. Instead, it asserts that Narcissus had a twin sister who was exactly alike in appearance. When she died, he used to go to the spring, and knowing that it was his reflection that he saw. There he found some relief for his love, because the image reminded him of his sister. [5]

The flower that Narcissus turned into later was used when Hades abducted Persephone as "a snare for the bloom-like girl". Persephone was attracted by the sweet scent of the narcissus, and gathered the flowers.



Naomi: I love this woman and her family so much; she really helped me along the way in the occult that I don't even believe I could repay her for her kindness. I truly believe it was destiny that I found you Naomi. What a beautiful adapt that she has become and still untainted by the uglyness of this world.
Laura: Simply beautiful in every sense of the word, I'm so lucky that I was able to find you. I truly believe that you made me a better person. Me and you will always stay close.
Lisa Lashes, Queen of Hard House is personally one of my fav. DJ, also an inspiration to my love of Hard House! ^_^ You'll probably see me at school listening on my walkman or shoving my headphone on a friend and it's almost 70% of the time it'll be Lisa Lashes. Wished I had her talent on the breaks. ^_^
Cally Cage, Princess of Hard House and the name couldn't be anymore clearer. She got the talents and breaks to make anyone start dancin in the middle of the floor.
Andy Whitby, personally one my top fav. male DJs. Listening to his mixes has inspired me to buy a deck of my very own. ^_^ Come on if you haven't listened to him as of yet, then go and listen to him now! After you listen to him, believe me you'll think of him as the true Saviour of the Dance Floor.
Actually one of the first Hard Dance cds I've bought was by DJ Yoji Biomehanika and I loved it! ^_^ Still personally one of my favorite DJs of all time.
Global Deejays: DJ Taylor, Mikkel, FLOw
If anybody loves pure House music then they'll love Global Deejays; a type of style will make the retro into something so much more! ^_^
DJ Keoki, one of my favorite Club Kids and DJ; personally one of my favorite tracks is Jealousy that he did. ^_^

DJ Steve Hill, also one of my personal favorite DJs of all time. ^_^ Love all his tracks and always puts me into a state of euphoria. ^_^
THE WILD HUNT
Samhain Full Moon Sabbat 18th Oct. 2002, Leytonstone London
"Saul and the Witch of Endor" (1526)
Oil on panel, 88,3 x 123 cm
Rijksmuseum, Amsterdam ..

My Blog

Bootcamp

Okay so I just talked to my recruiter yesterday and she told me that I'll be leaving around September 9 for bootcamp. So, I am so glad that I won't be going to Texas during the summer as its so damn h...
Posted by Kirk on Thu, 22 May 2008 06:09:00 PST

Banishing and Witchcraft

It's funny, I can't seem to remove this banishing on this girl that I put on or maybe its that I can't decide that I truley want to get rid of it. Its funny she doesn't even know its on her. But I kno...
Posted by Kirk on Tue, 11 Mar 2008 01:56:00 PST

Out of the House

I got kicked out of the house today. If you want to reach me call my cell and not my house phone. Im survivine everybody, lol. I guess I just have to concentrate on the here and now.
Posted by Kirk on Thu, 01 Nov 2007 08:58:00 PST

Tracks I need to Find (Just a self note for me)

01 Armin Van Buuren - Birth Of An Angel 02 Armin Van Buuren - Communication part 3 (XDR Reconstruction) 03 BT Feat. JC Chasez - Force Of Gravity (Ferry Corsten Remix) 04 Rank 1 - Beats @ Rank 1 ...
Posted by Kirk on Thu, 13 Jul 2006 10:53:00 PST

Blood and Gold (Alchemy)

Blood and Gold By Michelle Emerson Has anyone looked at our incredible blood under a microscope? What color was it? GOLD . . . sparkling, shiny beautiful GOLD. If you have not witnessed this t...
Posted by Kirk on Sat, 24 Sep 2005 07:05:00 PST

Emergence of the Feather'd Ka of I

This image shows lines of cognition in oblique and willful disconjunction. One utilises oppositional feelings, thoughts, attitudes, moral perspectives, off-beats of musick and dance, stillness and m...
Posted by Kirk on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

No Love

How I wished for my emotions to end, I never wanted to feel emotions like lust, desire, nor the feeling of love. Feelings like these emotions brings confusion and foolishness, I never wanted to experi...
Posted by Kirk on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

Future?

What's going on with my life, I don't what I should do, I'm scared; I'm scared of the future, I'm so sad and confused and I don't know what to do. Today I went with my friend Heather to the mall; she ...
Posted by Kirk on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

Spring Break

Ahh, I'm so happy that spring break started today for us! I wonder what I'll do for tomorrow; one thing I should do is go over to my friend's house for that special surprise I'm going to get, hehe. Bu...
Posted by Kirk on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST

The Meeting

Ahh, I'm so energetic today, I haven't been so happy and relaxed in awhile. The sky is so beautiful today and the weather is perfect. I ended up lighting some incense for Hagith today and gave her a s...
Posted by Kirk on Mon, 01 Jan 1900 12:00:00 PST