Beau profile picture

Beau

I'm gonna microwave a bagel and have sex with it.

About Me


I'm all about intelligent conversation and music. I talk a lot about things that most people couldn't give a shit about. My brain is full of junk. I decided to start a blog because at least then I'll have a record of most everything that pops into my head, and just maybe it will entertain someone for a brief moment.
If I say something that offends you, then I can only assume that you have to lighten up a bit. Life is a lot easier if you stop letting things bother you so much. I'm gonna say a lot of things in my blogs that you wouldn't hear others say. If it helps, just know that I'm not trying to cause anyone harm. Words are just words, so get over it.
I'm not very traditional so don't talk to me about gender roles or archaic notions like marriage. I'm not religious and I don't understand why you are, if you are, but I still accept you as you are. You likely don't accept me though.
If you're one of those people who has to make everything they do seem difficult when it's really not, don't waste your time talking to me. And if you can try to stop doing that, you'll likely stop pissing off everyone around you.
I'm trying to simplify my life and that includes the following:
1. Work at a job that I enjoy, in which I can make a impression on others, and in which I can progressively increase my income through increasing productivity. Hopefully I can get to a point soon enough where I'm making enough money to live comfortably and be able to help people who can't help themselves.
2. Constantly work on improving myself by acquiring as much knowledge as I can, and as many new skills as I can handle. FYI - As soon as you stop learning stuff, your job is done so please get off my planet. Thanks.
3. Spend my free time with people who are just easy to be around. I think I've said this a few times, but life is hard enough without having to deal with shit from your friends and family. The older I get the more I realize how much I shouldn't be wasting my time on people and things that are destructive.
That's all for now. Check the blog.

My Interests

Piano, music, technology, the future, funny shit, funny people, nerdy stuff, reading online(no books), learning new languages, making money, new ideas, anything different from the norm

I'd like to meet:

Real people.

Music:

Current Faves: Death Cab for Cutie, Gavin DeGraw, Daniel Powter, Coldplay, Motion City Soundtrack. As a musician(piano player/vocalist) I love anything I can play/sing. All of the piano player artists from the past 40 years including: Bruce Hornsby, Jackson Browne, Billy Joel, Elton John, Ben Folds, Marc Cohn, Marc Jordan, Steely Dan, Chicago, Harry Connick Jr., Journey, Burton Cummings, etc. I also like anything that's good. By good, I mean something that just sounds good to me. Whether it be a guitar riff or a bass line or awesome vocals, it doesn't matter. Genre doesn't matter to me if the song is good. Anything produced by Mutt Lange is good.(From Def Leppard to Backstreet Boys) I think one of the best opening riffs in a song is "Lisa Loeb - I Do". It's like drums and a sliding bass and it just drags you into the song. Another one is "Tonic - Take Me As I Am", just before the last chorus there's this tiny guitar solo break and the part that leads into the chorus is just awesome. I'm a big Rascal Flatts fan, I mean, the vocals are awesome in that band. I could probably talk about every one of the 1800 songs on my computer and point out where I think "that part" of the song is. There's always something that makes you think, "This is a great song." I just noticed I have 5 Moxy Fruvous CDs so I should probably mention them too. It goes on and on and on. I love shows like Classic Albums or Behind the Music. Not a fan of people who put down your taste in music because they don't understand it, or it doesn't fit with their idea of good music. Music is very personal, which is why it's so widespread.

Movies:

I like movies that are intelligent or really stupid. Also anything that is about the future. Like if the whole movie gets crappy ratings but throughout the whole thing the main actor has a robot hand that can turn into things like keys and tools and stuff, I'm fascinated. Not even sure I listen to what the actors are saying, I generally just sit and watch what the robot hand is going to do next. Or like if the main character has special skills. Shawshank, for example, when he starts doing everybody's taxes for special privileges, that's awesome. And when he's really honest and expects the warden to be the same way but the warden fucks him over by throwing him in the hole, then he fucks the warden by escaping and stealing all of his money-that's probably the greatest thing in a movie for me. When an honest person tries to help someone bad, the bad person screws them and then the honest person somehow gets justice. Also funny movies are awesome, ones that just progressively get funnier as the movie goes on - like Old School and Wedding Crashers, or Mean Girls(that's a funny movie, I'm serious), or Groundhog Day.

Television:

Simpsons, Futurama, Family Guy, Conan O'Brien, Sopranos, Six Feet Under, Deadwood, All 700 Law and Order variations, My Name is Earl, All the CSIs, Friends, Chappelle's show(wish it was still on), etc. etc. etc.

Books:

I don't read books recreationally.

Heroes:

Anyone who can say they are truly content. Also people who are able to raise a family, work and be an entirely pleasant person, all at the same time. Also people who dedicate their entire self to helping others fix their crappy lives. Selfless people.

My Blog

Have you had your morning smoke yet?

On my way to work most mornings, I walk by many people smoking outside their respective places of employment. One building had so many people smoking outside of it that I wondered if they worked for ...
Posted by Beau on Sun, 17 Sep 2006 04:08:00 PST

You smell.

Ok, I'm not going to lie to you and tell you that I don't smell bad on occasion. Usually an end of day thing and mostly involving the feet. Easy enough to fix - quick wash of the feet, dry em up, ma...
Posted by Beau on Sun, 26 Mar 2006 06:54:00 PST

J-Roc: Lived, died, wore a dress and sandals mostly

Do you love Jesus? Do you think that all the good things that happen to you happen because Jesus loves you and you love him? Do you love him so much that you just have to share that love with everyo...
Posted by Beau on Mon, 13 Mar 2006 08:46:00 PST

The right way to spit

In Canada, most of our public waste prevention efforts focus on recycling. In many Canadian cities they even have a public composting program to help you "recycle" anything that is biodegradable. I'...
Posted by Beau on Sat, 11 Mar 2006 07:16:00 PST

Never No Time to Play

Just felt like posting the lyrics to this old-school(read early 90s) hip-hop tune that I like. If you like the lyrics download the song, it's good. It's totally old-school. I'm not sure what "moves...
Posted by Beau on Wed, 08 Mar 2006 12:17:00 PST

Travel causes divorce?

"Finally, retirement is here.", you say. Got married.  Raised a family.  Worked your ass off.  Retirement city. "Time to go on that trip we've always wanted to go on, my dear.", you say...
Posted by Beau on Fri, 03 Mar 2006 05:15:00 PST

Lyrical Geniuses!

I don't know who writes all of Simple Plan's songs but it's takes a whole lot of talent to write this line from "Shut Up":"You think you're special...but I know, and I know, and I know, and we know, t...
Posted by Beau on Mon, 27 Feb 2006 07:06:00 PST

"Code Blue, Dr. Jesus to the ER, stat!"

What is wrong with TV evangelists?  Ok, so maybe you didn't do so well in school and you have trouble holding down a paying job.  Maybe you tried to get into medicine but realized you don't ...
Posted by Beau on Sun, 26 Feb 2006 07:21:00 PST

Prince on SNL

Ok, I just saw Prince on SNL and it was the best live performance I've seen in a while. I'm not usually a Prince fan, but it was really good! I didn't know he was also an awesome guitar player! J...
Posted by Beau on Sun, 05 Feb 2006 09:12:00 PST