Army Chris profile picture

Army Chris

I have been accused of being a morally bankrupt individual. This is not true… I just have differen

About Me

I have been accused of being a morally bankrupt individual. This is not true… I just have different stock options. Most people would describe me as an anti-social megalomaniac with grand delusions of mediocrity. I tell them they don’t know what that means. Ok that takes care of my self important ego boosting, try to sound like an individual, criteria. I use to be in the Army. hence the name. There are too many Chris’s in the world. We breed like rabbits. I love “The Rocky Horror Picture Show” although it has been a few years since I saw it in theater. I like the Maryland Renaissance Festival, Darkon, music and gaming. All the usual stuff. I believe that life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, stake in one hand, Jack in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out & screaming "WOO HOO what a ride!"

My Interests

ObituaryDied 24/7/365 in America's Heart, USAToday we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend by the name of Common Sense who has been with us for many years No one knows for sure how old he was since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm and that life isn't always fair.Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn) and reliable parenting strategies (adults, not kids, are in charge). His health began to rapidly deteriorate when well intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place.Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition. It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer aspirin to a student; however they could not inform the parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims.Common Sense finally gave up the ghost after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot, she spilled a bit in her lap, and was awarded a huge settlement.Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust, his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason.He is survived by two stepbrothers; My Rights and Ima WhinerNot many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone, or recognized the name!If you still know him pass this on, if not join the majority and do nothing.

I'd like to meet:

It's hard to come up with something original when people write the same stuff in their profile. My self included. Every one loves music, hanging out with friends and having fun. No one likes, fakes, stuck up people or liars. Just once I would like to meet someone that likes being lied too.

Music:

Marilyn Manson, Alice Cooper, GWAR, Pantara, Pain, NVN Nation, NIN, Trans Siberian Orchestra, Type O-Negative Stephen Lynch... Rock, Hard Rock, Punk Rock, Classic Rock, Rock-A-Billy, Psycho Billy, Metal, Heavy Metal, Black Metal, Death Metal

Movies:

Horror (My Favorite): Saw 1 & 2 (I’m sure I will add Saw 3 to this list), Hellraiser (all of them), House of a 1000 Corpses, Living dead series, to name a fewHistoric: Braveheart, Master and Commander, Fly Boys, Glory, Memphis Bell, Gladiator,Comedy:Dodgeball, Six string Samurai, Big Trouble in Little China, All Kevin Smith films (Clerks), All Troma films, Snatch (never trust a man with a pig farm), Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels, Shawn of the Dead, Rockey Horror Picture ShowKung Fu Theater: Crank, Hero, Gojo Bridge, Jackie Chan, Tony Jaa, Transporter 1& 2, ZatoIchiSuspense and Drama: The Usual Suspects, the Sixth Sense, the Departed, Casino, Rounders, Good Fellas, the GodfatherAnime: Hellsing, Akiera, Berserk, Irresponsible Caption Tyler, Vampire Hunter D

Television:

Rome, Carnivale, Deadwood, Count Duckula, Profit (must see) Penn and Tellers’ Bullshit, History Chanel, Red Dwarf, Black Adder, Monty Python’s Flying Circus, Are You Being Served?,

Books:

Master and Commander (Aubrey-Maturin Series) by Patrick O'Brian Angels and Daemons, Digital Fortress and The Da Vinci code by Dan Brown Harry Potter series by J.K. Rowling The Prince by Niccolo Machiavelli

Heroes:

Anton LaVay

My Blog

Sexy Friends Request

  Now, I'm all for porn. I love porn. However I am getting tired of all the Friends request that I'm getting on myspace. Over the past few days, I have been getting bombarded by all the "look at ...
Posted by Army Chris on Tue, 15 Jan 2008 09:34:00 PST

Vegas was awsome

Las Vegas was awesome!!!!   Most of what I did was see shows and eat. Oh, how did I eat. First, the food.   There was a Brazilian buffet where you had a cold salad bar but they brought o...
Posted by Army Chris on Mon, 10 Dec 2007 11:06:00 PST

Orphers

I went back to Orpheus a few weeks ago. I went of a Friday witch I think was a mistake. Not because the club was dead or anything but the music is more goth than industrial. The slower and more & emot...
Posted by Army Chris on Mon, 19 Nov 2007 12:42:00 PST

Rocky! Rocky! Ra! Ra! Ra!

I just went to Rocky Horror Picture Show for the first time in a long time in Fairfax. It has been to long since I have done Rocky. There was some nice eye candy and it was just a good atmosphere. I n...
Posted by Army Chris on Sun, 05 Aug 2007 01:37:00 PST

Aggressive

Between no food in my stomach and stress at work, the two rum and cokes hit me hard. I started to feel aggressive, real aggressive. I went to Bound tonight. I don't think I will go back, it's a small ...
Posted by Army Chris on Sat, 04 Aug 2007 12:25:00 PST

Death by Deathly Hallows.

For those that might not know, I work at UPS. So to day at work, I unloaded two Simi trucks of nothing but Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. Each box had 8 hard cover books in it. They stack them ...
Posted by Army Chris on Tue, 17 Jul 2007 10:56:00 PST

Just some more things I dont understand. Cartoon Version

When you here someone say their name is Bambi, the first thing that comes to mind is female white trash or a female prostitute.Why is this a stereotypical common name for prostitutes and trailer tras...
Posted by Army Chris on Mon, 16 Jul 2007 10:18:00 PST

So, this is Love?

So, this is Love? So, this is love? Well, it fucking sucks. I finally found someone that I love. She's perfect in almost every way and everything I wanted. I know the difference between love and lust....
Posted by Army Chris on Mon, 18 Jun 2007 11:03:00 PST

Jerry Falwell is dead!

Jerry Falwell is dead! And the Angels sang out in immaculate course. A light shun across the land and God said, "I don't want him. He's an asshole."   Now we just need Fred Phelps and Pat R...
Posted by Army Chris on Tue, 15 May 2007 12:56:00 PST

Religions of the World

RELIGIONS OF THE WORLD Taoism:   Shit Happens. Hare Krishna:   Shit Happens Rama Rama Ding Ding. Hinduism:   This Shit Happened Before. Islam:   If Shit Happens...
Posted by Army Chris on Mon, 07 May 2007 07:12:00 PST